A Love So Deep (38 page)

I
t
was a warm day in December. Twenty-five more days until Christmas. In another few short months, a year would have passed, marking the first anniversary of Amanda’s death. Graham shook the thought from his mind and tried to replace it with something more upbeat.

Graham could see the tail end of his Buick Regal in the parking lot. It desperately needed a bath. There was nothing worse than driving around in a dusty, dirty, black car. Graham had been under the weather with being out in the night air so much—seeing after Martha and making sure Dad was all right. He would take it to a car wash before he drove to Rita’s. He couldn’t have his baby sitting up in a dirty car.

Signs of Christmas were everywhere. Lampposts were decorated with Christmas lights and garland and billboards advertising the hot-pick item for Christmas loomed from every corner.

Graham drove on until he got to Charlie’s street. He hooked a sharp left and two rights before he came upon what Charlie called his one-room bungalow. It was a small, two-bedroom starter house that was built in the early sixties. Charlie led an easy life and purchasing anything beyond this modest A-frame house would have been a waste.

Although in need of a little paint, the mint-green stucco house had stood unceremoniously at attention for the past thirty-eight years and had served Charlie well. If the walls could talk, there would be enough volumes to fill the Library of Congress. A stray cat walked lazily across the lawn, a local homesteader without exemptions and looking for the few morsels Charlie took the liberty to leave it every now and then.

Graham got out of the car and used his key to get in. It was neat inside—everything placed just so and not a dish left in the sink or dishwasher. The blinds in the house were partially open and a fourth of a bottle of Chivas sat on the kitchen table next to an empty glass.

The mere sight of the liquor got Graham’s adrenaline going. He tapped lightly on the table until the drumming became loud enough to hear next door. Graham picked up the bottle and threw it across the room, hitting the stove and finally crashing to the floor. And the glass was next. Now Graham had a mess to clean up, but it made him feel better.

He cleaned up his mess and walked into the living room. There were pictures of his family…Amanda, Deborah, Liz, Martha, Elroy, Graham. Not just one but dozens. There was a picture of Uncle Roc. He was a good man but died too early from drinking and women.

Graham was done sightseeing. He was ready to get out of the house. The bedroom was next to the kitchen and Graham went about retrieving the items Charlie wanted.

More pictures cluttered the dresser top, and once again, they were pictures of Graham’s family. He opened the top left drawer as instructed and thumbed through the papers until he found what looked like Charlie’s insurance information. Just under it was Charlie’s birth certificate.

Graham pulled the birth certificate from between the other papers and brought it out into the light so he could read it. He began to read and stopped short, not believing what was printed on the certificate. He coughed, then grabbed at his chest, bracing at the revelation that promised to change people’s lives once again. Mother: Eula Mae Perry Father: Harvey Ford. Mother: Eula Mae Perry. Mother: Eula Mae Perry. His mother’s name was Eula Mae Perry Peters.

Graham sat on the floor and began to cry out loud. “He’s my damn brother. He wanted me to find this. Ohhh, God. All this time and he didn’t say a word, not one freakin’ word. Kept it all bottled up inside until one day the cork could no longer contain its contents. And the anger and rage pours out, venting hostilities where it might hurt me the most. I’ll be damned,” he said, the paper in his hands now crumpled. “But now I understand.”

The front of his shirt was wet. Graham sighed and looked once again at the piece of paper that was more than sixty years old. He held it there, staring at the name of his mother unable to take his eyes away. Why had he not been told? More tears like raindrops fell. He wasn’t sure whether he should be mad at his mother or Charlie.

He remained in a heap on the floor another fifteen minutes. Slowly lifting himself to an upright position, Graham tucked the piece of paper back in the drawer but not before taking a last photographic picture of the text. He developed the image in his mind and ran it through the rinse until he could see all parts clearly. “EULA MAE PERRY” blinked at him like a yellow traffic light, warning him not to go there or at least proceed with caution.

Turning toward the nightstand, Graham picked up the telephone and began to dial out. He wasn’t sure he remembered the number—it had been quite some time since he used it last. But as his fingers tickled the illuminated buttons, the numbers quickly came to him, and he drummed them out on the phone pad.

“Hello,” said the tiny, feeble voice.

“Aunt Rubye?”

“Yes. Ya gonna have ta speak up so I can hear you.”

“Aunt Rubye, this is your nephew, Graham Peters.”

“Who?”

“GRAHAM,” he shouted.

“You mean Eula Mae’s boy?”

“Yes, auntie.”

“My, my, my. It’s been a long time since I heard ya voice. Yo sisters told me Amanda died. Lord, so much happening in deh world. How ya doin’?”

“Fine, doing just fine. Look, Aunt Rubye, I need to ask you a question about something that happened a long time ago. I hope you can remember. It would be very important to me if you could.”

“Now, I hope I can too, son.” A high-pitched cackle came from somewhere deep in Aunt Rubye’s nostrils. “I don’t ‘member too much these days.”

“It’s about my momma, your sister.”

“Oh, I see.”

“This is hard for me, but I guess I’ll just come out and ask. Did Momma have another child before me? A baby boy?”

There was a long silence. Graham wasn’t sure if Aunt Rubye had been caught up in the rapture or the cat had her tongue.

“Are you still there, Aunt Rubye?”

“Yes, dear. I…I’m still here. Now what you knowed about Eula Mae havin’ a baby boy?”

“Remember my best friend, Charlie?”

“Yeah, it’s been so many years ago. But, I ‘member that tall, slick-talkin’ fella that couldn’t keep his hands off the gals and kept you in trouble.”

“We’ve been best friends, Aunt Rubye, since we were in junior high school. Well, he’s sick and in the hospital. He asked me to pick up some records from his house, and in doing so, I stumbled upon his birth certificate. Imagine seeing Momma’s name on his birth certificate—Eula Mae Perry; place of birth: St. Louis, Missouri; hospital: Parklane General. And all of this a year before I was born in the same city, in the same hospital, to a woman with the same name. Uncanny?”

“Un-who?”

“That’s all right, Aunt Rubye. I just need to know if you know something.”

“Well, since ya put it like dat…yo momma was pregnant by this good-looking fella named Harvey. Harvey Ford was his name. I see ‘em clear as a crystal bell. He staid after yo momma, and she kept runnin’, but finally, she gave in…just one time was allllllll it took. She tolt me, but we couldn’t tell Momma or Poppa what she’d done. See back in those days, you couldna say stuff like
my baby’s daddy this or that
, shoot yu’s better not say yu’s was pregnant. That broke a family apart back then. Sho’ did. But we had to tell Momma ‘cuz she’d keep up with ‘r’ cycle and all. Yes, she did. Knowed it better than we did. We told Momma and Momma told Eula that she would have to put that baby up for ‘doption. First, she had to go live with Aunt Frankie and Uncle Jasper. Tore Eula Mae’s heart up to have to give dat baby up, but there was no way ‘round Momma and Poppa, and we were sworn to secrecy.”

“Did Momma ever try and find her baby…or even care what happened to him?”

“Now, watch yo mouth boy. It weren’t yo momma’s decision to give up dat baby. She had to do what Momma and Poppa told her to do or there would be conse…consequinses…you knowed what I’m tryna say. Anyway, I believe Eula Mae knowed who had her baby. Momma and Poppa make the ‘rangements, you see. It was someone twice removed from the family but could keep a secret. Me and Eula didn’t talk about it much, ‘specially after she married yo daddy. A shame…I hope that boy fared well. I knowed it hurt Eula to her grave that she didn’t get to love and care for that baby like she did you and yo sisters.”

“Well, Aunt Rubye, I think you’ve answered most of my questions. I only wish I had known that I had a biological brother—maybe some things would have been different between me and Charlie. In my heart of hearts, I believe Charlie resented me some, but he never let on until it was too much for him. Well, I thank you, Aunt Rubye.”

“Dat all right, son. Maybe Eula Mae can finally rest in peace. Now, when yu’s coming home? Whens the last time you come home? Better not let me die and I ain’t looked on your face ‘fore I go. I’ll come back to haunt you, boy.”

For the first time that afternoon, the phone felt light. Graham let out a small giggle and Aunt Rubye let out a high-pitched cackle. A smile radiated across Graham’s face.

“How about I come home for Christmas? I’ll contact my sisters, and we can all enjoy the holiday together.”

“Yu’s better not mess up. I’ll be waiting for you ‘cause we gonna have Christmas St. Louis style. Love ya, boy.”

“I love you, too, Aunt Rubye.” Graham hung up the phone, retrieved Charlie’s belongings, and headed for Rita’s. He needed her more than ever.

A
drenaline
flowed in heavy doses through Graham’s veins. He pulled away from the curb in front of Charlie’s house smoking at forty miles per hour. It would take approximately twenty-five minutes to get across town to get to Rita’s.

The drive down E. Fourteenth Street was scenic—people loitering and hanging out in the streets like it was summertime. An occasional rumble from the Bart train as it tore through the middle of one of the busiest streets in Oakland caused few heads to look up as the train whizzed by on the rail. Graham squinted his eyes and shook the kink out of his neck before finally producing a smile. It had been a long day, although it was only early afternoon, but it was a day full of revelations that put so many misplaced puzzle pieces into perspective.

Graham headed straight for Rita’s. There was no evidence that anything happened earlier in the day—no crime scene tape or curious neighbors conducting their own investigation. Wobbly knees knocked together as Graham proceeded to Rita’s door.
What if she didn’t want to see him? What if she didn’t give him a chance to explain, as he had not given her the opportunity?
Martha’s voice boomed in his ear.
You need to get up from here and find that girl. Don’t let her out of your sight.

Graham folded his fingers over into his palm, exposing his knuckles. He rapped lightly on the door and waited. After a minute, he put his ear to the door, and not hearing anything, knocked harder. A few moments later, light filtered from inside as the door was cracked slightly. Rita peered from within the shadows—a portrait in charcoal on black canvas. A look of surprise was etched on her face.

“You have company?” Graham asked.

“No,” was Rita’s flat reply.

“May I come in?”

“If you like.”

“I’d like that very much.”

The charcoal still vanished when the room became illuminated with light as Graham passed through the threshold. Rita watched him as he passed in front of her—her face drawn tight and eyes downcast. Graham stood at her door and looked at the sight that lay before him.

Clothes were strewn neatly throughout the living room. Long gowns in garment bags hung on hangers that hung from several doors. Shoes of various styles and colors lined the floor several rows deep. The room gave the appearance that a brand-new store was getting ready to open—the owner making last-minute preparations for the big event.

Graham’s eyes darted throughout the room. “What are you doing?” he asked with a frown on his face.

Rita went about what she was doing. She didn’t look at Graham, still unsure why he had come.

“Packing. I’m going home.” She looked up at Graham who stood in the middle of the room staring at her. “I’m going to tell Clyde today that I’m canceling the rest of our engagement.”

“Have you told the band yet?”

“Not yet, but they’ll understand. I need to lose this town.” Rita paused and drew her lips back not sure she wanted to continue her thought. But she did. “There is one thing William was right about…I need to expand my horizons.”

A frown appeared on Graham’s face and his eyelids lowered when he looked at Rita. “Are you and William getting back together?”

Hands on her hips, Rita turned and looked at Graham. And with movements as fast as a stealth bomber, she was on him…up in his face, waving and pointing her index finger right between his eyes.

“I recall that not even two hours ago you walked out on me without giving me the benefit of an explanation. And now you stand at my door all meek and humble like you’ve lost your last friend, like you’ve suddenly realized the error of your ways. I don’t understand your unpredictable moods and I’m not sure this relationship is worth the effort, although my heart is saying otherwise. You look at me in mock contemplation and ask whether or not William and I are getting back together. No, Graham, it has
never
been my intention to be with him.” Rita threw her hands in the air out of frustration. “I have…sit down, sit down…let me explain this to you.”

“I know, Rita, I know all about the extortion attempt. I know about the stalking.”

“Who told you? Martha? Did Martha tell you?”

“Yes, Martha told me. She gave me a good lashing, too.”

Graham reflected on that moment in Martha’s hospital room. That wise old woman knew how to get his attention. He looked back into Rita’s eyes, wanting to touch her hands, but thought better of it.

“I’m sorry, Rita. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t take the time to listen—to understand what was going on.” Graham took a deep breath. “So many things have been going on these past few days, and my mind has been in turmoil. Finding out that your ex-husband was in the neighborhood, that he was at your home that time of morning—me not knowing he was in town and that you had seen him, sent me in a tizzy. I’m not proud of the way I acted, but you don’t know what I’ve been through these last few days.”

“I don’t blame you for being upset. It’s what you did with the information when I gave it to you. So many days and nights I was plagued with when to tell you. Both my mother and Martha agreed that I needed to tell you.”

“Your…”

“Shhhh…let me finish. I had hoped William would just go away. My mother knew all along that he was going to be the death of me. Even last night at The Water Hole, he tried to intimidate me, and I got darn near ugly, too. I’m sure that’s why he showed up last night to explain.

“I want you to know, Graham, William is not a part of my life and hasn’t been for the last twenty years. I believe he has finally grown up and come to realize some of the frailties of life. For sure, he finally realized Rita had taken the last of his crap.” Rita got up from the couch, picked up a blouse, and began to fold it.

Watching her, Martha’s words shot at him again like a two-edged sword. “Are you going to unpack your clothes now?”

“Why?” Sadness covered Rita’s face as she continued to fold another piece and put it into a suitcase. “What happened to trust?”

Suddenly, Graham jumped up and was at Rita’s side. She could feel his breath against her skin. He stood so close it made her tingle inside.

He kissed her neck, and a sigh escaped Rita’s lips. “I love you. I love you, Rita Long. I don’t want you to go. We have a lifetime of memories to make. I want to marry…” he paused, “marry you.” Now he said it, and he could feel Rita’s body become taut. “I was going to tell you today. I had planned to take you to lunch and a movie…movie and dinner…until this stuff about Charlie surfaced.” Graham threw his hands in the air. “I was feeling so good when this day started out, and I thank God I have a chance to make this day right. Whew.”

“Slow down, baby. You’re all out of breath. Enough of that. What I want to know is did you just ask me to marry you? I mean…did I actually hear the words or was it my imagination?”

“I love you, Rita, and I want to marry you.”

She hugged Graham and he put his arms around her. Their lips came together like cake and frosting until Graham pulled away.

“Baby, I’ve got something else to tell you…something I found out a little while ago.”

Here goes,
Rita thought as she stared back at Graham. She tried to hide her disappointment. It was like coming off a high too fast and bracing yourself for another painful episode.

“Charlie is my half-brother.”

Rita let out a “How?” as the words seeped in. “Your what?”

“Yes, Charlie is my half-brother, and he’s known a long time but never said a word.” There was a long pause. “It’s a little scary.”

“Wow,” was all Rita could say and sat down on the couch.

Graham sat down and continued. “He had me to go over to his house and pick up some things for him today, and I think he had hoped I would find that document. Well, I did, and when I saw my mother’s…hmph…my mother’s name,” Graham sighed, “my mother’s name on it, my heart jumped out of my chest. I didn’t know what to think. All this time, and I didn’t even know.”

“Well, that explains some of his ranting and raving. It didn’t make sense to me then, but this certainly explains some of it.”

“That doesn’t excuse Charlie’s behavior. Charlie and I have a lot of talking to do, and it’s going to take the Lord to get me through it.” Graham rested his chin on the back of his hand. “You know, Charlie and I have got lots of memories—too many to count. From St. Louis to California. Back in the day, we were a team, the mack daddies of our day…”

“Yeah, right.”

“We were. We were close as brothers could be without at least one of us knowing it. Maybe that’s why he stayed so close. Hmph. What am I going to do? What are we going to do? The police are going to take him to jail.”

“You’re going to acknowledge your brother, forgive him, and work things out.” Rita paused. “I’m not going to press charges. Charlie went over the edge, although I don’t understand it. I don’t want to see him, Graham, but he’s going to understand that this is not over. What about Mary Ross?”

“I don’t think we have to worry about Mary Ross saying anything. No wonder Martha is fond of you. You’re just like her. Now, I want you to take those clothes out of that suitcase and grab your purse, because you’re going with me. First, we’re going to pick up Dad and take him to visit Martha. I’ll have Deborah or Liz pick Dad up from the hospital. Then I need to see Charlie to iron out some things. Then, you and I have a date. We are going out to dinner, restaurant of your choice, and for dessert—well, how about back to my place?”

Rita couldn’t contain her smile. “My baby is trying to take control of the situation. Listen to you…you’re so cute and funny. Anywhere you want to go, my love.”

“I want to be with the woman I love.”

Rita’s eyes glistened as she continued to listen to Graham. Graham sensed she was overcome by his humility. He stood several feet from her and then she moved toward him with her arms outstretched, intertwining her arms with his like a Gullah woman weaving her baskets.

“I love you, Graham Peters. I love you with all my heart, soul and mind. And, I want to be with you, forever.”

Drip, drip, drip.
Charlie lay still on his back in the dimly lit room—the IV drip marking time.
Drip, drip, drip.

Charlie gazed at the ceiling and crawled across with his eyes. He suddenly grabbed his stomach and squeezed, rolled his eyes upward, and began to shake. He felt cold all over and began to shiver. Vomit rose from his stomach into the mid-section of his throat and he pushed down on his chest to make it recede.

A door slammed,
Charlie thought, his mind and body too weak to respond. He continued to squeeze his shivering and convulsing body, then opened his eyes slightly. With all the strength Charlie could muster, he sat up straight.

“It can’t be!” a delirious Charlie wailed.

Before him stood Amanda all dressed in white. Her hair was flipped at the ends, and she peered at Charlie as if he were a child.

“Why, Charlie? I thought you learned your lesson years ago.”

“Amanda…Amanda, is that you?”

“Charlie, why did you have to go and hurt Graham? I protected you from him all those years ago because you were like brothers. Didn’t want to break up the family—yeah, I considered your pathetic little self as family—but you just couldn’t leave well enough alone. You had to go and try and rape Mary and Rita. Why, when you had your pick of just about any woman in town? And if you had treated Ernestine halfway right, you would have known what true love was all about.”