A Little Harmless Secret (17 page)

She laughed. “Is that so?”

He nodded. “You kind of smell too.”

She shook her head. “I know when I’m not wanted.”

Turning, she started to crawl out of bed, but he grabbed her again, tumbling them over the sheets. He pressed her body into the mattress with his.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asked.

“I thought maybe I would find some food.”

He sighed as he felt his body respond to her, but he knew she was right. They needed food. He gave her a quick kiss then rolled off her and the bed. He grabbed a t-shirt and tossed it to her.

“Thank you,” she said so primly he laughed. “What?”

“Nothing. You are a contradiction in terms. So ladylike and proper now, but I think I have scratches on my back.”

Her face flushed and he thought back to what Kaheaku said…and her own confessions. The idea that she had never really dated boggled his mind. This was a new experience for her. And he was the one to give it to her.

He grabbed a pair of boxers and stepped into them. “Let’s go see what we can find.”

He held his hand out as an invitation. She stared at it as if it was a foreign entity. It took her only a moment longer to respond. She stood and took his hand. It wasn’t a huge step, but a significant one. He raised their joined hands to his mouth and kissed her knuckles without taking his gaze from hers.

Then, he led her downstairs.

* * * *

When Alicia polished off her bowl of ice cream, she licked the spoon dry.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this hungry, except for the last trimester I was pregnant with Bridget.”

“You were on your own?” he asked.

“Yes. I didn’t have anyone I could call on, so I decided to play the role of single mother.”

“And you were one.”

Alicia looked up at him and saw the genuine interest in his gaze. She nodded. “It was scary. I had gone to South Africa to have her.”

He frowned. “Why there?”

“My mother’s family had some land there and it wasn’t really tied to us. I have a fake identity I could use. I’m pretty damned good with the accent.”

“And no one knew about it?”

She shook her head. “Although about three months after having Bridget, I had to move. I had a few inquiries from someone about who I was. I didn’t stick around to find out who it was.”

“Smart.”

She tried not to get so happy about his approval. “I am my father’s daughter.”

“So, you looked for me?” he asked. “When you felt you had to run from South Africa?”

“Not then. I’d become paranoid. But when I found out I was pregnant, I did look for you. It’s a good thing I didn’t find you or I would have never moved back to the states.”

“Why?”

“I thought you had something to do with my father’s death. I wasn’t about to let you within ten feet of Bridget.”

“And you didn’t think I should know about her?”

She sighed as the emotions from those days washed over her. The panic, the fear…the horror that she was alone in the world.

“I didn’t know. I wasn’t in my right mind. Pregnancy…it zaps your brain cells. Losing my father shattered me, then knowing I had this little being to protect…I started to understand why my father was so fanatical about my safety. And I had a few close calls while I was pregnant. I tried to hang around Paris, but I barely made it out of there alive.”

“And still you didn’t come find me.”

“If I had known this is who you were, I would have tracked your fertile ass down and demanded you help.”

His lips twitched. “Fertile ass?”

“Yes. Bloody hell, I was on the pill and we used a condom. Ending up pregnant was kind of beyond anything statistics could predict. But, not knowing what the hell was going on, I couldn’t chance it. Having the attack at my own house…that was over the top. It was the one place I knew we were always safe.”

His frown darkened. “And the bastard knew it. Which means they knew you.”

She nodded. “I know I can’t do anything to make up for the time you lost with Bridget, but I just want you to understand that I had no choice. I didn’t know where to turn and I couldn’t trust anyone’s information.”

“What about Kaheaku?”

“Sean?”

He nodded.

“I didn’t think of him. No, that’s not true. I did think of him, but I had no way of contacting him. When he started working in private contracting, he wasn’t the easiest to find. Add to that the threat…I just couldn’t involve him. I had a very real fear that anyone connected to me would end up in danger. Sean would be pissed to know that I was trying to protect him, but I had to.”

He said nothing for a moment, then he reached out with his hand and cupped her face.

“You’re tough, you know that?”

She tried to shake his hand away by moving her face, but he refused.

“No. I want you to know that in any fight, I’d want you at my back. I trust you, but know that you don’t have to do this alone anymore. I’m here and there are people who want to help.”

Tears stung the backs of her eyes. She blinked trying to keep them from falling, but she failed. He wiped them away with the backs of his fingers, then leaned over to kiss her. It was more sweet than carnal, but it affected her more than any kiss he’d offered her before. In this, she felt his dedication and trust. He pulled back and rested his forehead on hers.

“I owe my sister a big gift.”

She smiled. “Why is that?”

“She’s the one who talked Micah and me into going to Seattle. As soon as the dust settles, she’ll remember and won’t shut up about it.”

She chuckled and was about to suggest they go back upstairs, but his mobile rang.

“Hey, Conner.”

She moved away from him, but he grabbed her hand and kept her standing beside him.

“Shit. Yeah, I know that name.”

He was quiet for a few seconds, and took the opportunity to kiss her knuckles.

“When?” Another silence. “I’ll see when you get here.”

He hung up and looked at her. She knew there was something pretty bloody important if Conner was coming over right away at this time of night.

“Do you know anything about the Spencer File?”

She cocked her head to the side and thought. Then the stories came flooding back to her and she smiled. “Oh, that. It’s an urban fantasy.”

He didn’t smile. “Tell me.”

“There was a rumor about a spy who had sold information to some of our enemies. The problem was that it seemed to pop up whenever we had a mission go bad without explanation. I remember early on in my career, we had one big bloody fuck up, but sometimes it is just a coincidence or someone slipped somewhere. So many of us are guarded all the time, but it just takes one little slip—a drunken confession, something like that. So, in the end it isn’t true. It’s used to scare agents I think.”

Devon shook his head. “No. The Spencer File was pretty damned real, because I was the one who discovered it and brought it to the attention of the CIA and MI-6.”

“Wait. This went back too many years to be one person. That’s why it was always dismissed.”

“I had come up with some information, or at least a theory that it was a network of double agents who were recruited by the others already working as a mole.”

“But what does that have to do with my father?” she asked. “You’re not suggesting that my father was a traitor are you?”

He shook his head. “No. Conner uncovered your father’s files. I don’t even want to know what laws Maura broke, but they found references to it. That’s why he was looking for me. He needed help working on what he wanted to find out.”

“Are you telling me my father read your file and wanted to connect with you about that?”

He nodded. “I think so. I also think it’s what might have gotten him killed.”

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

By the time Conner got to the house, they had dressed. Alicia tried to calm her heart rate, but it was hard to do. Devon showed Conner into the office. Alicia could tell from his expression that it wasn’t good news.

He shook his head and gave her an apologetic glance. “I hate to bother y’all this late at night, but we also got a hit right before I came over. Rory called with the information. Right now, I don’t want to do any more talking over the phone.”

She knew Rory was one of the head security specialists they employed and one of the few people who had known who she was.

“No problem. And I have to agree. Using the phone, no matter how secure, is always a security issue. Truth is, the sooner we figure all of this out, the sooner I can feel safe again.”

The idea that she would finally be able to just live her life was a fantasy she’d never thought would come true. She’d been looking over her shoulder for so many years…and she wanted to be a regular mom to Bridget.

Conner pulled out his tablet, tapped on the screen a few times and brought up the files.

“So, what’s this about the Spencer file?” she asked. “What did you find?”

“The Spencer File. Yes, well, I had always thought it one of those rumors that were never going to be proven.” He looked at Alicia with a hint of understanding in his eyes. “All spooks have that weird story of a spy selling secrets. The big one here was of a Soviet being raised as an American.”

“But it isn’t a myth,” Devon said. “Not from what I found.”

“Exactly,” Conner said grimly. “I didn’t expect you to react like you did.”

Devon nodded. “I remember that. I got a few laughs at the office when I went after it.”

“Are you sure this was real? It had always been considered a boogie man kind of story for agents. Like to scare us into being good little spies,” Alicia said. “I know my father dismissed it for years. But apparently something changed his mind when he started to research old cases.”

“I know it is. I had too many reliable sources not to believe them. Plus, when I presented the information, the higher ups got very quiet,” Devon said. “It was a little eerie the way all contact was broken off from them.”

“Oh, that’s not good,” she said. “When a spook goes silent, that is usually a very bad thing.”

“Why did you latch onto it?” Conner asked.

Devon shrugged. “Not entirely sure. I’ve always been a geek and there were a lot of little places on the internet that chatted about it. The complexity of it intrigued me. Like a puzzle. The prevailing opinion was that they resurrected the name over and over to use. That it was a family kind of thing.”

That made sense to her. In fact, it was a bit brilliant. “So, like Menudo?”

“What?” Conner asked. Devon was looking at her like she were insane.

“Like the boy band from Mexico. When the members got too old, they just replaced them with another boy. That way they kept it young and maintained teenager interest.”

Devon smiled. “Odd, but yes, that’s what they did. Or what I could discern. Maybe it was that fact that made it seem unbelievable. Since the rumors had been around more than twenty years, it seemed implausible. But what if the same people—or in this case country—used the name over and over, then that would make sense.”

“Yes, and apparently, it was sent to England. It was their issue after all. And, that’s where your father comes in, Alicia.”

“I’m seeing where this is going. The CIA handed it over and nothing was done right away. They let it sit there for a few years, but my father was semi-retired. His mind was as sharp as ever, and he had the right security clearance. He’d been going over old information, looking at missions that went right, those that went wrong, and writing up reports. I think he said something about using them for training. Father was one of the few agents around who could remember some of those days and he still held his security clearance. So, this must have hit his desk.”

Conner hit a few things on his tablet then handed it to them. “This is apparently where he got, and Devon’s name came up.”

He handed it to Devon and he shared the screen with her. The file was American in origin and Devon’s name was blacked out.

“How did he find out it was you?” She rolled her eyes. “He called someone. Dad knew someone in every bloody spook agency around the world.”

He nodded. “That’s the report I made up on it. It was right before my life went to complete shit, so I completely forgot about it.”

Conner’s mobile rang. He answered.

“I told you I wanted to stay off the phone for security.” He rolled his eyes and listened to whoever was on the phone.

“Okay.” He handed the phone to Devon. “It’s Rory. He wants to talk to you about this report. He can only find what I have there and he wants to know if you remember anything.”

Devon took the phone and moved away from them to talk.

Alicia looked at the clock and realized it was probably before sunrise in Florida. “I hate that Rory is up this early working, but I really appreciate it.”

Conner gave her a sardonic smile. “First, I always like bugging Rory. He’s involved with my sister and well, I like screwing with him. Plus, he’s on Miami time so it’s not
that
early.”

She continued to look through the report, noting some of the sources. Then, there was a name that stood out amongst the notes.

Xan Winslow.

A chill ran down her spine, seeping into her soul. All the moisture seemed to evaporate in her mouth and she found it hard to swallow.

What a bloody, bloody mess. All the sounds around her seemed to fade away and she felt the room spin. She gathered up enough strength to draw in a deep breath. She realized then that Conner was still talking.

“And, someone has a huge hard-on for you, Alicia. They’ve been looking for you the last few weeks; I pinpointed their traveling IP. They were on the west coast, but the latest is Honolulu.”

“Here?”

Her heart almost stopped right then and there.

“Yes. In fact, they’re staying down in Waikiki, although we haven’t been able to pinpoint it exactly. They are within three blocks. But my bet is whoever they are, they are staying at one of the hotels.”

She would be able to contact the traitor. It was a number she’d avoided using in the past, but now, she would.