A Little Bit of Crazy (Little Bits) (15 page)

He pinches my backside, I squeal and giggle before taking off for the elevator.

     “Hey baby, what are you doing here?” James smiles as I pad into his office carrying my laptop and other essentials. I plant them on his desk and squish in beside him. One of the builders follows with my spinney chair. Can’t sit at my laptop without a spinney chair. “Umm…”

     I open my laptop and plug it in before turning to my perplexed husband, “Too noisy upstairs. I’m borrowing your space. Carlos says you don’t have any visitors planned for the day and I need quiet. Our clients can’t hear me over the noise up there.”

     “That’s fine with me,” he grins and kisses my cheek. We work side by side until home time.

     My stomach burns, I hope I’m not coming down with something. Probably all of the dust upstairs.

     “Hey,” James says as we enter our apartment. “Are you ok?” I nod, not trusting my mouth to projectile vomit on opening it. “You sure?”

     “Ill,” I say and curl up on the couch clutching my stomach. Shit that hurts. “Hungry. Sick.”

     “Babe,” he says softly and kisses my forehead. “You have a temperature.”

     I wave him off, “I’m fine. I think it’s just bad period pains. This stupid implant, I haven’t had a period in over a year and it’ll probably be bloody painful when I do.” I crack a smile. “Get it, bloody painful. Coz of the bleeding.”

     He rolls his eyes and walks away from me. Returning minutes later with chicken soup and a glass of water. I drink the water but dash to the toilet after a few spoonfuls of soup. My head is over the basin as I retch up the contents of my stomach. “Babe,” James says softly as he holds my hair back. “Maybe it’s something you’ve eaten.”

     I shake my head. Definitely not food poisoning, I’ve had that twice before due to my old roommates crappy cooking and it was nothing like this. My lower stomach hurts, it’s throbbing and the nausea I feel is awful. I know I’ll be ok in the morning so I get James to take me to bed with a bucket.

     The poor man stays with me, he doesn’t leave my side the entire night. Only to wash the puke bucket out. Now that is love.

     As suspected I feel much better the next day. My stomach still aches but the nausea isn’t as bad. I can actually eat and enjoy two slices of toast before heading to work. Tomorrow we are speaking to an estate agent to find us the perfect apartment. James is grumbling because I won’t stay in bed and let him look after me but there’s too much to do. The office is half done and I need to go in to check on things. Keep the builders on their toes.

     Margie has a coffee waiting for me but it brings on a wave of sickness. Even she notices how sick I look. Stupid implant. That must be it. I got sick last time I had my first period after a long length of time.

     My skin does have a yellowy tinge to it. Is yellowy a word? Must be, I just thought it. So therefore it is a word. Like flabbergasted. Hell of a word, still not sure whether it’s real. Must check dictionary later.

     “This is perfect,” James says as we walk through a huge penthouse apartment. It has four bedrooms, a huge kitchen and dining room. The living room overlooks the city and river. It’s perfect, absolutely perfect. It’s also the first place we’ve seen. How lucky is that?

     The décor is modern, and classy. All it needs is furniture. Another job for my wonderful interior decorator.

     “I can’t afford this,” James hisses as I announce the fact we’ll take it.

     I roll my eyes, “Baby. Please. I want this. I promise you can spend all of your hard earned wages on the interior if you allow me to buy the actual place.”

     “That seems like a brilliant compromise,” the kind woman smiles at us. Clipboard in arms. James shots her a glare that makes her cower. “This is a sought out location, you are first to see it and I guarantee it will be gone if you don’t buy it before the next lot.”

     I put on my puppy dog eyes and pout my lower lip, “What’s mine is yours baby. Please. Please. Please. Your mom will love it to!”

     He sighs and nods, “Fine. We’ll take it.”

     I scream and throw my arms around his neck. Ignoring the throbbing in my stomach as my body stretches. “Thank you!”

     “Let’s get this paperwork sorted.” The woman grins and we get on with the boring details.

     “Hungry?” James asks as we walk down the street. I need to sit. Man my stomach aches. I shake my head and follow him into Starbucks. “You ok? I really think we should go to a doctor.”

     I shake my head again, fighting down the urge to vomit, “I’m fine.”

     “Ok, let me grab a drink and we’ll go. You want anything?”

     Head shake. Hurry up, I’m gonna hurl!

     “Don’t forget you have lunch with my mom tomorrow.” I nod in response and he orders his beverage. “And Marie is coming over later with
Summer.”

     Nod, nod, nod.

     “You really look like shit,” he sighs and grabs his drink. I don’t even have the energy to call him a name back. My knees wobble and I double over to grip my stomach. “Fuck, baby. I’m seriously taking you to the doctor.”

     “No, I’m fine.” I say and head into the bathroom. He sighs and follows, waiting outside the door, ordering me to keep it unlocked just in case. I head to the toilet and sigh with relief, I just got my period. “Told you so,” I grumble on the way out. He shakes his head in amusement and follows me to the car.

     I take a couple of pain killers when I return home and slowly the pain subsides whilst I soak in the tub. James sits by me, he’s worried. It’s nice that he’s worried but he’s smothering me a little bit. He only leaves when Summer and Marie arrive, being loud as they are.

     “Hey Summer, be a little louder! I don’t think China heard you yet,” I shout and smile as the girls giggle. “James,” I call and he bursts into the bathroom. “Help me out.”

     “If you aren’t better in the morning I’m calling the doctor. I don’t care what you say.”

     “Not to worry,” I say as he helps me out and wraps me in a fluffy towel. “If I still feel like this tomorrow I will go willingly.”

     He nods seeming satisfied and helps me dress. Not because I need it, just because he wants to.

     “Ladies,” I smile at the two females on the couch as I enter the room in nothing but my fluffy white bath robe. “So, give me the gossip.”

     “Oh my god, you’re never going to believe who Marie fucked last night,” Summer giggles and gulps down her wine. She waves her empty glass in the air. Marie, who is staring at her phone refills it without even looking up. James is shocked to say the least. He’s watching the multi-tasking capabilities of my friend with a gaping mouth. I reach over and shut his mouth without even looking. My skills rock too you know.

     “Stan Jacobson,” Marie blurts and slams her phone beside her. “Fuck me he was shit in bed.”

     I screech, “No way! But he’s so hot.” I ignore my husband’s grunt of protest.

     Stan Jacobson is the lead singer of Marie’s favorite band. She’s been trying to bag him for months. This is quite an accomplishment as the dude has a wife. I frown a little at that. Being a married woman I can now empathize with other married women and I can’t help but feel a little ashamed of my friend. “He’s married though,” I say quietly. “That’s…”

     “Nah, they got divorced last month. Haven’t you been watching TV?” she smirks and picks up her beeping phone. “He was totally rubbish. All rough and lazy with a stupid grin. He was done in two seconds and then acted like it was the best sex I’ve ever had. Arrogant bastard, it’s safe to say that band is not my favorite anymore.”

     
Me and Summer burst out in a fit of giggles. “Totally feeling you,” I wag my eyebrows a few times, giving them a mischievous smile. “Before I married him you know how scared I was he’d be a shit lay.”

     “Hey,” James groans, his head peeking from behind his laptop. I wink at him, “Don’t worry baby. You’ve totally ruined me for all other men.” He beams at me, flushing a little and I turn back to Marie. “So, how’d you manage it?”

     “I got him alone and threw myself at him. He’s called me like twelve times since. Yuck,” she cringes and sips her wine. “Even sent me flowers this afternoon.”

     Summer snorts and picks up her own phone, “My Chris was like that. Do you remember?”

     “Yes,” we both announce in chorus, praying she doesn’t go into detail on how they both met for the millionth time. “Christ yes we know. We were there,” Marie adds and refills her own glass. “You guys totally need to get single again. I miss our man hunts.”

      “Hey, sitting right here,” my husband laughs. We all look at him, “Go away,” we say
together and giggle loudly. James rolls his eyes, packs up his laptop and kisses me on the forehead, “I’m going to bed. Try to keep the cackling to a minimum.”

     “Whipped,” Marie announces and flicks her arm in the air at James. “Totally whipped. Good girl Maya, at least you got your man where you want him.”

     “I’m not whipped.”

     “Baby, can you get me a glass of water,” I whisper and rub my stomach. He nods and rushes off. The girls cackle, literally cackle as he comes back into the room with a glass in hand. “Thank you handsome.” He rolls his eyes, accepts my kiss and disappears into the bedroom to finish his work in silence.

     “We just bought a penthouse apartment in the Preston building,” I grin and the girls gasp.

     Of course Marie screams, “HOUSE WARMING PARTY!”

     I raise my eyebrows at her, “After the last one? Are you out of your fucking mind? The apartment cost me two million!”

     “What I’d do to have your bank account,” Marie sighs, her eyes rolling up as if dreaming. Summer nods in agreement, humming a little. “So. House party?”

     “No!” I hear James shout from the bedroom and we cackle once more.

     I shrug, “James wants a baby.” Marie chokes, I nod, my face grim. “That was exactly my reaction.”

     “I want a baby,” Summer says dreamily and presses her hands to her belly. “Chris wants to wait a few years.”

     “Hey James!” I shout. He grunts in response. “How do you feel about a wife swap?” He doesn’t answer. Marie throws her head back and laughs with me. Summer scowls playfully and snacks on a celery stick dipped in humus. “I want to wait ten years.”

     Marie nods thoughtfully, “If you get pregnant, you can kiss your freedom goodbye.”

     “Why don’t you just hire a nanny?”

     I shrug, “If I’m going to have a kid I don’t want a nanny constantly. My kid deserves a parent that wants to give them all of her time you know?”

     “Umm…” Summer says with a smile. “I get it. You want your freedom. I’m honestly bored with the whole partying scene. I just want Chris to get a ring on my finger. His mum is really putting the pressure on him.”

     “It’s about time,” I say and they both look at me totally shocked. “What?” I laugh defensively. “I know I was on Marie’s page a year ago but things have changed. I thought getting married was a death sentence but I see the appeal now. Hell I experience it daily.”

     “Don’t listen to her,” Marie begs playfully and throws her hand over my mouth. “She doesn’t know what she’s saying. James and his mother have poisoned her brain.”

     I roll my eyes and swat her hand away, “Shut up.” I giggle and sip my water feeling the nausea coming back on. “Let’s order in. I’m hungry.”

     The girls agree on Chinese food. We eat, chat, laugh and drink the night away. They both leave around two in the morning and I crawl into bed with my sleeping husband. He looks so peaceful, so angelic. I kiss his eyelids and watch him for a few minutes before finally dozing off.

     I choose a suit dress for my lunch date after convincing James I’m much better, which is only half of a lie. My stomach aches but my nausea is gone and my energy is back. My outfit consists of a blue pencil skirt, white shirt with a tied collar and a matching blue fitted jacket. I match it with black heels and black handbag.

     I let my hair loose so it hands in natural waves to my waist and put on a pair of stylish sunglasses. James’ eyes darken when I walk into the room. It’s not my normal attire but I actually want to make an impression at the women’s club. No men allowed.

     “Wow,” he grins and kisses me on the nose. “You look very… sexy yet sophisticated.”

     I exhale in relief, “Thanks baby, I have to go. I’m going to be late for tea and crumpets with the league of extraordinary snobs.”

     He chuckles and sees me to the elevator. I wink at him and am on my way.

     When I step into the hotel I shudder a little at the sight of the women in the dining room to my left. Sylvia waves me over as I walk through. All eyes are on me and silence has descended over the long table. They’re like a bunch of vultures. With their beady old eyes and stiff postures as if ready to face a lion.