A Late Thaw (3 page)

KILEY BUCKLED HER SEATBELT
and stared down at her knees while Cole climbed into his seat. At sixteen, she’d have found his behavior charming. For years she’d thought his protectiveness meant he had feelings for her, real feelings. She knew the truth now. Cole thought of her as his kid sister. Lately, he thought of her as the kid sister who disappointed the family.

She was so lost in thought she didn’t notice when he turned out of the parking lot in the wrong direction.
Realizing that they were heading away from her mom’s apartment, she frowned. “Cole, I’m staying at my mom’s place—by the library.”

“I’m aware.”

“Then you know we’re heading the wrong way?”

“We’re gonna stop by my place.”

Cole’s family’s farm was a solid twenty minute drive out from Barrett’s town center. “I don’t know what you’re thinking, Cole, but I’m not in the mood.”

He kept his eyes on the dark road in front of them but arched a single eyebrow. “If you don’t know what I’m thinking, how can you be sure you’re not in the mood?”

The dashboard lights threw a faint, flickering illumination over the plains and angles of his face. A new hardness there pulled at Kiley’s heart despite her best reason. He wasn’t a boy anymore. Her former best friend had grown into a man while she wasn’t looking.

His current antics pissed her off, but Cole was a good man. He was only trying to help in his special stubborn way. If Kiley told him that being near him broke her heart, he’d stay away. Telling him was impossible. Even imagining the look of pity he’d give her tore her insides to shreds. She rubbed her hand over her heart. Hell, it already stung.

She didn’t answer his question. Kiley watched the familiar landscape pass by through the window and let some of the better memories comfort her. They passed a
cornfield and the packed-dirt lot folks parked at to access the best spot for swimming on the river that threaded its way through town. Her breath hitched when they hit the acres of neatly lined firs, spruces, and pines grown by Cole’s family for decades. The trees had started as a side business for the Thomas’ dairy farm, but by the time Cole had arrived, the focus had switched.

As a child, Kiley thought their farm was the most magical place on earth. She remembered twirling amidst the trees as an early snow coated them with glistening white crystals. That moment, that snow, was the reason she’d ended up studying weather.
Magic is cooler when you know how the tricks work.

The sound of gravel churning beneath the truck’s tires alerted her to their arrival. It
was one of her favorite sounds. For years, her mom had gotten a little extra work at the Thomas’ farm each winter to help pay the high winter heating bills and put a few presents under their own tree at Christmas. Kiley had always tagged along. She’d helped Cole finish his chores early, and they’d had the entire afternoon to play.

The farm felt as much like home to her as anywhere else ever had.
Someone had hung a new sign on the old heavy wooden signpost: Thomas and Son Farm. They’d post more specific signs about the trees and hours in season. Kiley had helped Cole paint the one they used when she was a teenager. They probably used a new one these days.

Cole parked
in the lot in front of the open garage attached to the large, old farmhouse. He hopped out without a word or a glance in her direction. Kiley followed him into the garage and stopped at a makeshift workbench. She slid her fingers over a freshly cut Birch log as the sweet clean scent of wood dust tickled her nose.

Cole watched her from the step at the side door.
“Yule logs and candle holders. Twenty percent of the business these days. Well, with the wreaths.” He said it matter-of-fact, as though she was just a curious tourist.

Was this why he’d brought her here? To show her that he was managing the farm on his own? She’d never doubted that he could.
“Cole, I don’t—”

“Come on in.” He opened the door
and walked into the kitchen.

Sighing, Kiley followed him in. She glanced around
. Subtle changes signaled that he’d taken over the farm completely. The appliances and paint colors were the same, but the shelves where his mother’s cookie jar collection once rested were now filled with glasses from New England Breweries. She smiled. Cole was a bachelor. His freezer was probably filled with Hungry-Man dinners instead of the casseroles and homemade dough his mother kept there.

“How’s your mom and dad?” She should have asked earlier, they’d always been kind.

“Good. They like Florida. Call every week to complain about the heat.” He leaned back against the counter. It looked like a casual gesture. Most people would think he was completely relaxed, but Kiley saw the muscle tension in his shoulders. Cole always reminded her of the wild lynx they’d seen at a refuge. The cats sprawled out in their habitats, eyes closed and breathing slowed, but with a closer look it was clear that they were absolutely alert.

Kiley grinned. “And you’re doing okay? I mean
, you’re handling all the work—managing the farm—by yourself?”

“Yeah. I
’ll have to hire a few more hands this season, but…this isn’t what I wanted to talk about.” He dragged a hand through his hair and rubbed the back of his head.

“Okay. What do you want to talk about?”

His eyes narrowed. Maybe he was still trying to figure it out himself. “Not yet.” He stomped over and yanked open the refrigerator. “You still drink this girly stuff?” He held up a wine cooler.

Kiley
’s laugh died in her throat. The drink was meant for another woman—someone Cole saw and wanted. Not her. “I’m not really thirsty.”

He took out a beer and used the bottom of his
T-shirt to give his hand enough friction to uncap it. His eyes closed with his first sip. They always did.

So much for not being thirsty;
Kiley’s mouth went dry. How could watching him enjoy a sip of beer still do this to her? She took a couple of steps toward the living room, trying to ignore the way her hands ached to touch him.

Cole took a second large swallow, placed the bottle on the counter
, and came toward her. His large hand gripped the back of her head the second before his mouth slammed onto hers.

She gasped as the tastes of cold beer and hot Cole collided
on her tongue. Her knees buckled but he gripped her side, firmly holding her up. He kissed her too hard and too fast for her to kiss him back.

Shocked, she pulled away. “Cole?”

His eyes were nearly black. His jaw clenched; he exhaled through his nose. “You asking me to stop?”

COLE STUDIED HER FACE
. He couldn’t read her.

K
issing her hadn’t been part of the plan. He’d wanted her to hear him out, tell him why she’d run away when they could have had something. That was all. He’d only planned to talk to her. Then she’d stood in front of him, staring at him with her big blue eyes and licking her lips with her pretty pink tongue. Not kissing her was no longer a choice.

“No,” she whispered breathlessly.

He frowned, trying to remember what he’d asked her, and rubbed his thumb over her cheek. Kiley shivered as she leaned closer, and Cole claimed her mouth again, slipping his tongue over her soft lips. When her tongue pushed up to meet his, he groaned and pressed her back against the wall.

H
is palms flattened against the wall on either side of her head, trapping her. He expected her to protest, to tell him he was acting like a caveman; instead she reached up and grabbed at his shoulders. He kissed her harder, wanting her to taste his frustration.

Cole
pulled away and she whimpered. Kiley wanted him. She felt it, too, even if she wouldn’t admit it yet.

He stared at her swollen lips for a moment before meet
ing her gaze. “Two years, Ki. Two fucking years. You couldn’t even call?”

She shook her head.

“Say something. Tell me what I did wrong.”

She looked away. “You didn’t do anything. I just wanted to go to school.”

“Bullshit. I never said you shouldn’t. There was no one in this whole world prouder than I was when you got that scholarship. This has nothing to do with school.”

“I don’t know what to say, Cole. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, I—”

“Don’t. I’m not a ten-year-old girl. You didn’t hurt my feelings. You ditched me—tossed me aside like an old toy you’d outgrown.”

She gasped. “
No! No, I never—”

“I knew you thought Barrett was too small for you, too old
, or dull or stupid. I didn’t know you thought I was, too.” By the end, his voice was quiet and rough, foreign to his own ears.

“I never thought that.” She shook her head as tears began tumbling over her eyelids and streaming down her cheeks.

He turned. He needed to hold on to his anger, needed it to keep from losing himself in the sweetness of having her so close. But it was exhausting.

She reached up and cupped the side of his face, trying to pull him back. Her hand was softer than he
’d imagined. “Please, Cole. Just…it wasn’t like that. I swear.”

Cole
blinked back the stinging sensation in his eyes before looking at her. She wasn’t even trying to hide her tears. He brushed off her cheeks with his thumbs. “Don’t cry. I can’t think straight when you’re crying.”

Kiley
sniffed. “You kissed me.”

He frowned. It didn’t sound like an accusation, more like bewilderment. “Don’t play with me like this, Kiley.”

Her eyebrows shot up. She stared at him—mouth open and eyes wide.

She didn’t know. How could she possibly not know?
Cole cursed under his breath and walked away, needing the space to think. He hadn’t hired a skywriter that summer, but no one in their right mind would say he’d been subtle.

She followed him into the living room and stood to the side as he dropped onto the armchair and buried his face in his hands.
Kiley had rejected him and run away. She must know that. If she didn’t, if she’d never even noticed how he felt…it was all on him.

He threaded his fingers together behind his head and looked over at her. “I missed you. You were my best friend, Ki.”

He swore he saw pain fill her eyes before she glanced away. “You were mine, Cole. I never wanted—”

“What happened then?”

“We grew apart, I guess.”

“I see.” He didn’t. Not really. It sounded like a polite way to say that she was too good for him now.

Kiley sighed. “You still treat me like I’m some little girl who needs her big brother to take care of her. It’s sweet, and I know you mean well, but…”

Cole laughed hoarsely. “I know you can take care of yourself. You’re a ballbuster, Kiley. I
…I can’t let people hurt you, not if I could stop ‘em.”

She sat down on the coffee table in front of him. “It’s not your job
. I’m not your kid sister. I’m not your…anything.”

Cole moved to the edge of his seat and
tugged one of her plaited pigtails. “Well aware.” He let his thumb slid over each smooth curve and bump until he reached the elastic that encircled the ends. He pulled it off and reached for the other. She trembled beneath his fingertips as he slid his hands into the cool, dark hair at the base of her scalp and shook the braids loose. He arranged her hair loosely around her shoulders and sat back. “I want you in my bed, Ki—nothing brotherly about that.”

NO WORDS HAD EVER
been more shocking. Kiley stared at Cole, frozen as her brain tried to translate what he’d said into something that made sense. It was no use. The rapid-fire beating of her heart sent her blood rushing in a loud, chaotic swirl.

“Be with me.” He lifted her chin so she had to meet his warm
, brandy-colored gaze. “Tonight.”

“I don’t understand.” She
really didn’t. How could he say it so casually?

“I want you.” He shrugged
and grinned as though he wasn’t flipping her entire understanding of the world on its head. “I’m thinking you want me, too, though I suppose you wish you didn’t.” He brushed his knuckles over her forearm.

She couldn’t hide her sh
iver. A thousand questions sped through her mind. She tried to settle on one, but Cole didn’t give her a chance. He stood up and held out his hand.

She took it.

How could she do anything else? Even a moment in his arms was more than she’d ever expected to get. Her body still buzzed from the startling kiss he’d given her in the kitchen.

Col
e squeezed her fingers and tugged gently. She rose, swaying unsteadily until he caught her elbows.

“I didn’t peg you as the shy type, Ki-Face.”

Her heart skipped a beat at his casual use of the lame name he’d called her during their first argument. Even as a seven year old, he’d been too good to actually say something hurtful. “I’m just a little tired.”

“Then it’s a shame you won’t b
e getting much sleep.” Chuckling deeply, he held her hand and guided her up the stairs and into his room. As he flicked on the light, she tried to remember the last time she’d been there. His mother had set a strict no girls upstairs rule a week or two before his eleventh birthday. They managed it a few more times, hiding out to sneak candy before dinner, but not during the last decade.

Not
much had changed in the years since. The quilt looked newer, but had the same blues and greens as the old one. A model rocket was still proudly displayed on the dresser Cole’s grandfather built. The sight brought warmth to her chest. She couldn’t really remember a time she hadn’t been in love with him.

Cole reached into the side pocket of the apron she still w
ore and pulled out her cellphone. “Your mom will be expecting you home soon. Ought to call her. Don’t want her to worry.” He held the phone up high, shaking it above his head.

Kiley stood
on her tippy toes to get it back. She swatted his chest as she plucked it from his fingers. “And tell her what?”

Of course he thought of it before her. Cole was used to being responsible for others; he had family members
counting on him and dozens of employees. She wished she could say the call wasn’t necessary, or even better, that she’d already handled it. She would have texted on the way if she hadn’t gotten used to having no one waiting for her. As a grad student, Kiley had a tiny dorm room all to herself. It had been a few years since someone had worried if she didn’t come home at night. Still, Cole’s rightness stung her pride.

“That you’re with me.” He leaned
in close. His words slid, hot and moist, across the shell of her ear. She shivered as he continued to whisper. “Best tell her you’ll be back late tomorrow, too. I mean to keep you naked and busy until the sun comes up.” As he stepped back, Kiley fought the urge to cool her cheeks with her hands. He smirked. “You might want to leave out that last part, though.”

Kiley swallowed hard and hit dial.
She didn’t look at him; that grin was too much. “Hey, Mom—yeah…um-hmm…yeah. Mom, I just wanted to let you know I’m probably gonna crash at the farm tonight. No. No problem. Cole and I were catching up a bit and thought we’d watch a movie. It’ll be late when we’re done, so—okay. Yeah. G—” She looked up at him. “That was weirdly easy.”

“Moms like me.” He plucked the p
hone from her hand and laid it on his dresser.

“How do they not know you’ve debauched most of their daughters?”

“Ooh…debauched. Bringing out those fancy college words.” His large hands circled her waist and dragged her up against his chest. “Tell me some more.” He untied the bow her apron strings made at the small of her back and placed the apron down beside her phone.

Kiley shook her head.

“Come on, pretty girl, give me another.”

Her stomach fluttered. Did he really think she was pretty? Or was that
simply what he said to the women he got up to his room? “You’re incorrigible.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that.” He reached for the lacing on the front of her bodice. “This has been encouraging me plenty.” A single jerk of his hand untied the knot at the bottom.

“It doesn’t mean—”

He kissed her hard and fast. “I know what it means, Kiley. I do know how to read.”

Her face heated up again. She reached down, placing her hand on his to stop him from unwinding the laces. “They’re just for show. There’s a zipper in the back.”

He laughed. “Of course there is.” He stepped behind her, brushed her hair over her shoulder
, and kissed the back of her neck.

“Oh!”

“Do you like that?” Cole pressed another soft, open-mouthed kiss along her neck. “Tell me.”

“Yes.” Her toes tried to curl in her too-tight shoes.

“You don’t sound too sure,” he teased as he began lowering the zipper on the back of her dress. Cole pulled the zipper all the way down and then touched the sliver of bared skin with his forefinger. “I’m gonna have to work on making you sure.”

“I am.”
What would he say if she told him the truth then and there—that she’d loved him for as long as she could remember?

Cole
slid the fabric over her shoulders and down her arms. Once her hands were free, the dress fell easily, pooling around her feet.

She crossed her arms over her breasts and wished again
that she owned a bra that worked with the uniform’s strange neckline. Hell, while she was wishing for things she couldn’t have, she wouldn’t mind going up a cup size.

“You make me crazy
, and you have no idea, do you?” He rested his cheek on her head and rubbed his hands down her arms.

Kiley
tensed, expecting him to pull her arms away. But he didn’t.

“I think you’re gonna have to sit down so we can get those shoes off.”

She stepped gingerly over her dress and sat down on the edge of his mattress, wearing only a pair of white thigh-high stockings, cotton underpants, and high-heeled ankle boots. Ridiculous. “I didn’t really dress for this sort of thing.”

He kneeled in front of her like a white knight and lifted one of her feet. “I don’t know. The stockings are pretty damned hot.” He unzipped her boot, yanked it off
, and reached for the other. When that one dropped to the floor, too, he grinned. “And how many other girls have puffy white clouds on their panties?”

She looked down and groaned. Sure enough, she was wearing cloud-printed underwear. If she
weren’t still covering her breasts, she’d have covered her face. Kiley was sure her cheeks were cherry red. “They were a gag gift. A friend from school found them and he thought—”

“You got a lot
of guys buying you underpants?” He looked down, the muscle on the side of his jaw twitching. Was he jealous or merely disappointed in her again?

“It’s not like that. He’s not a boyfriend or anything.” She’d only added them to the rotation in a moment of
delayed laundry day desperation. Most of her underwear was boring but not actually embarrassing.

He stood up and pulled his
shirt up over his head. “Doesn’t matter. You’re not keepin’ them on anyway.” He smirked at her for a second before bending down and untying his own boots.

“Cole.”

He toed off his shoes and unbuckled his worn leather belt. “Yeah?”

“You’re gorgeous
.”

He paused
, hands at the button of his jeans, and looked at her with something like surprise on his face. “Oh, yeah?”

She nodded. He worked hard, always had
. His chest and arms bore the long, lean muscles to prove it. But it wasn’t the broadness of his shoulders or the definition on his abs that made Kiley ache for him. Cole was simply beautiful. She knew on an intellectual level that he wasn’t really perfect. His nose was a touch too big, and when he smiled the left side of his lips tended to rise higher than the right side did. What Cole possessed was an innate charm that made people smile at him without even thinking about it. She did it right then.

He pushed down his jeans to reveal an entirely unembarassing pair of slate grey boxer briefs hugging an already impressive erection
. He held out his hands and came back to her.

She stood up on her own
, moved closer, and slid her arms around his neck. Cole moaned as he placed his hand on her back and hugged her until her breasts flattened against his chest. Kiley closed her eyes and clung to him, tempted to rub herself against him like a cat demanding attention. She was determined to maintain at least a touch of dignity. This was just sex to him, affectionate sex certainly, but still just sex. That he made it feel like more only meant he was a skilled lover.

Surviving this night would require keeping a careful hold on her heart
, but it would be worth it. Even a single night with Cole would be worth the lifetime of hurt that might follow.

She buried her face against his chest and inhaled deeply, letting his familiar scent comfort her even as it pulled her arousal to a peak.

Cole’s large hand cradled the back of her head, and he tugged lightly on her hair. “Gotta taste your lips again.”

She rose on
her toes to meet his mouth, sighing at the first teasing brush of his lips over hers. “Please, Cole.” She needed more.

The hand on the back of her head tightened its grip
, and he spoke against her cheek. “I’ve got you. Gonna make you feel so good. This…this is good, Ki. This is so good.” His voice was deep and hoarse, almost unfamiliar.

Her heart beat fast and hard
like the ever-present sound of her neighbor’s bass jacked up in the dorm. She was certain he could feel it, too. It would probably bruise them both. She bit her bottom lip to keep from telling her secret and scaring him away.

He kissed her again, almost tenderly
, and she melted against him. If he pulled away, she’d be nothing but a puddle on the floor. Instead, he scooped her up as though she weighed no more than a small child. Pressing her face into the crook of his neck, she laughed. “I’m pretty sure guys only do this in movies and those books with girls wearing corsets on the covers.”

Cole placed her in the center of his bed and grinned. “But I’m doing it for purely practical reasons.”

“Oh yeah?”

“You’re a sexy woman, Ki, but you’re also a klutz
. I really don’t want to explain to the doc how you managed to end up with a black eye tonight.” He lay down on his side next to her and kissed her shoulder.

“I’ll have you know that I’ve grown out of that.”

He lifted his head. “Really?” His eyes twinkled mischievously.

“Mostly.” She grinned
, flirting with surprising ease. “And I’m way more flexible now.”

The blacks of his eyes doubled in size. “You don’t say.”

“I do say.” Kiley raised her arms above her head and stretched, arching her back and surprising them both with the sensuality of the gesture.

He swallowed hard
, and his eyes settled on her breasts. “Fuck.”

Her nipples tightened painfully.

She dragged his mouth to hers and poured her need into a kiss. She wanted to ask him if he could ever love her, really love her, but fear held her back.

Instead, frowning up at him and cupping his face in her hands she asked
, “Do you really think I’m pretty?”

She winced at her own childish insecurity. It wasn’t that she was particularly unattractive; plain
maybe. Cute on a good day. Her eyes were more grey than blue, and while she was thin enough, she couldn’t call herself shapely. She was an average girl in love with a man who could easily turn the heads of truly beautiful woman, and she’d known it for as long as she could remember.

Cole looked confused for a moment, as though he didn’t understand the question
. He’d probably never been with someone who’d make such a lame inquiry while in bed.

He brushed her hair away from her face and rubbed his thumb over her cheek. “You’re wicked pretty, Ki. Don’t you know that yet?”

His crooked grin made her entire body warm.

His
hand slid up to cover her breast. She gasped as her nipple peaked hard and tight. Each tiny movement of his palm made her twitch.

“Wow. I think you like that an awful lot.” Grinning with self-satisfaction, he lowered his mouth to her other breast and flicked at her nipple with the tip of his tongue.

She tangled her fingers in his hair, holding him in place. The swirl of his tongue sent spikes of pleasure on an express route down her body to join the aching between her legs. He settled his lips around her nipple and pulled. When she moaned, he moved to the other breast and repeated the entire process. Lick. Swirl. Suck.