A Journey of the Heart Collection (47 page)

Emmie smiled at him. Was that all this was about? “You know I'll help in any way I can. I loved Amelia too. I know it will be hard to take care of Gabrielle by yourself.”

“I need more than just occasional help. Gabrielle needs a full-time mother. I don't want her growing up shifted from place to place like a homeless puppy.”

Emmie's smile faltered. “You want me to take her? Don't you want her to live with you?”

Jacob scowled. “I wouldn't give my daughter up for anything. She's the only important thing in my life. I don't want you to take her to live with you. I want you to live here with me and take care of her.”

“Jacob, I would do anything I could to help, but I can't stay here alone with you. The entire fort would talk.”

“Not if we were married. I want you to honor your promise to Amelia.”

The words hammered into her brain and Emmie sat back as though from a blow. Honor her promise? She
couldn't marry Jacob! She was going to marry Isaac. Kind, loving Isaac who was waiting for her at Sarah's.

She shook her head. “You can't be serious. You know I'm going to marry Isaac.”

“I know you are a woman of your word and Gabrielle needs a mother. You needn't worry about me bothering you or expecting anything else from you except to take care of my daughter. I'll never love another woman like I loved Amelia. You'll look after Gabrielle, fix my meals, and tend to the house. That's all. You and the baby can have the bedroom. I'll sleep on the cot in the parlor. When she's a little older, I'll release you and you can marry Isaac.”

He stared at her fiercely as he said the words. His stern look seemed to dare her to contradict his command. Emmie swallowed hard. What should she do? Didn't he know how unreasonable his demand was? Did he really expect her to give up her life and future with the man she loved to be an unloved nursemaid and housekeeper?

You made a promise,
a voice inside her head whispered.

Jake stood up abruptly. “I know this is a shock, so I'm going to leave you. I need to talk to the colonel for
a little while. You think it over. I know you'll do the right thing.”

The right thing? This was supposed to be the right thing? Emmie stared at his back as he strode toward the door. How could he ask such a thing of her? What should she do?

She twisted her hands in her lap and stared at the sleeping baby. Amelia had been such a dear friend. Surely she wouldn't expect Emmie to give up her own chance at happiness to take care of the stern man Jacob had become.

A timid knock at the door broke into her confused thoughts. Jacob pulled it open, and Morning Song stood on the other side with a colorful Sioux blanket around her shoulders.

Jake stepped aside. “Gabrielle is still sleeping. I very much appreciate what you've been doing for me and the baby, Morning Song.”

She stared at the floor and color flooded her cheeks. “I would do anything for you and Gabrielle.”

He put his hand on Morning Song's shoulder. “Thank you.” He stepped around her, opened the door, and pulled it shut behind him.

Emmie gestured to the table. “Would you like
some tea while we wait for Gabrielle to wake up?” She needed someone to talk to, someone impartial.

Morning Song nodded. “Tea sounds good. The winter wind is very bad.” She looked into Emmie's eyes. “My friend is not happy. This place is sad for you.”

“Yes, but that's not the only problem. I don't know what to do about Jacob.” She stood and put the kettle on the woodstove, then sat and clenched her hands in her lap. “I made a promise to Amelia. One that I never thought I would have to keep.”

“My father says if a warrior cannot keep his word in the camp, do not trust him in battle with the enemy.”

“But what if keeping that word will ruin the person's life?” Emmie blinked back the moisture in her eyes as she gazed pleadingly at Morning Song. “I made the promise without thinking. But it was only to ease Amelia's agitation. I never expected to have to do what she asked.” The kettle whistled, and she went to the stove and poured the boiling water into the teapot, then brought it to the table.

Morning Song watched her prepare the tea for a moment. “What have you said you will do?” She touched Emmie's hand.

“Several weeks ago Amelia was distressed and
convinced she wouldn't live through childbirth. She knew I was also expecting a child and was alone. So she asked me to marry Jacob so I could care for them. Then my baby and I would be provided for as well. Now Jacob expects me to honor that promise.”

A strange look Emmie couldn't identify darkened Morning Song's features, then was gone. Was it anger? Dismay?

Morning Song gave a slow nod. “Your friend cared for you even when she was afraid. I see her thoughts.” She took a sip of tea, then set it down carefully. “A vow is most important when it's most hard.”

“I wouldn't really call it a vow.” Emmie sighed. “What about Isaac? I made a promise to him too. I love him. I've been so happy these past few days . . . happier than I've ever been.”

“I have seen this happiness. I cannot tell you what to do. You must seek the answer in your own spirit.”

The baby whimpered in the bedroom and both women looked up. Morning Song rose to her feet. “You are strong, Emmie. You will do the right thing.” She turned and went into the bedroom.

Everyone expected Emmie to be strong, but she wasn't. How could she turn her back on her love for
Isaac? She rose and took her cloak from the hook by the stove. She would talk to Sarah and Rand. They would know what to do.

The wind took her breath away, and Emmie had to battle to stay on her feet across the parade ground. Her bonnet lifted from her head for a moment before she yanked it down and tied it firmly in place. Drifts of snow were beginning to pile up against the steps as she hurried onto the porch.

Sarah was curled up with a quilt and a magazine on the cot by the fire. She looked up as Emmie came into the parlor. “Your face is so red! You shouldn't be out in this wind. Come join me under this quilt.”

Emmie threw off her cloak and hung it by the fireplace, then dove under the quilt. Even with the fire going full blast, the heat couldn't keep up with the wind, and the room was chilly. Her teeth chattered as she nestled close to Sarah.

“You are frozen.” Sarah wrapped the quilt tightly around Emmie. “Where have you been? I expected you back long ago.”

“Jacob wanted to talk to me.”

“All this time? What did he want?”

Emmie drew her legs up under the quilt and leaned against the wall behind her as she shared her predicament with her friend.

“Amelia never told me that! When was this?” Sarah asked.

“Several weeks ago when she wasn't feeling well.”

Sarah sat up straight. “Jacob would never agree to that! He wouldn't let someone else make such an important decision for him. Not even Amelia.”

“He agreed before she ever asked me. And now he wants me to do what Amelia asked and marry him.”

Sarah was silent for a moment. “I have to admit I'm shocked. But that was before you and Isaac were engaged. Amelia would never expect you to keep a promise like that now.”

“I've been thinking about it, and I think she would. When she heard about my engagement after Gabrielle was born, she said it was a good thing she made it through the birth all right so I wouldn't have to keep my promise to her.” She smiled a crooked smile, though her eyes burned. “He says I wouldn't have to worry about any physical demands from him. Just take care
of Gabrielle, cook, and clean. When Gabrielle is a little older, he will release me. But starting a marriage with divorce in mind doesn't seem right either.”

“Does he just expect you to give up a full life with Isaac to become some kind of glorified nanny?” Sarah's voice rose in her agitation.

“I've been telling myself the same things for the past two hours. But I keep coming back to the fact that I promised Amelia. Doesn't God expect us to keep our word?”

Sarah wilted. “Yes,” she murmured. Then she brightened. “But you are free from the promise if Jacob will release you.”

“He won't.” Emmie sighed again. “I don't know how I'm going to tell Isaac.”

FOUR

T
he wind chased Isaac and Rand across the parade ground to the Campbell house. Rand opened the door, the two men hurried into the room, and Rand slammed the door behind them.

He glanced from Sarah to Emmie, then bent to kiss his wife. “I'm cold clear down to my socks. Any stew left?”

“It's on the stove. I'll get it.” Sarah scrambled from beneath the quilt and started toward the kitchen. “Uh, why don't you help me get it ready, Rand?” she said with a sidelong look at Emmie.

Rand looked surprised, but he followed her into the kitchen.

Isaac looked at Emmie's sad face. The entire fort felt the same way. “Looks like Sarah wanted to leave us alone.” He sat beside her on the cot. He slipped an arm around her and pulled her close. “I'm so sorry, honey. I know you loved her.”

Emmie sighed and nestled in the crook of his arm. She turned her face up to him and he bent his head. As his lips found hers, he drew her closer and sensed a desperation in her he'd never seen. He wanted to keep kissing her all night.

He grinned as he drew back moments later. “Are you sure we can't get married sooner?”

Emmie began to tremble in his arms. Tears pooled in her eyes. Isaac thumbed away a drop that escaped down her cheek. “I know you're hurting. I wish I could fix everything.”

Emmie pulled away from him and clenched her hands together in her lap. “I must tell you something and I don't know how.”

Isaac frowned. “If it's that secret you and Jessica have been talking about, it doesn't matter.”

“So she
did
say something.”

“She didn't tell me your secret.”

Emmie gulped and swiped at the tears on her face. “That's not what I have to tell you. It's even worse.”

“Just say it. I love you and nothing will change that.”

“I love you too. That's what makes this so hard.” She looked up and stared into his eyes. “I made a promise to Amelia, one I never expected to have to keep.”

Isaac smiled in relief. “I would be glad to take her baby and love her. But I doubt that Jacob would allow it.”

“Just let me finish. Amelia thought she wouldn't survive childbirth several weeks ago. This was before you and I were engaged, before I would admit even to myself how much I loved you. She asked me to give her my word that if something happened to her, I would take care of the baby and marry Jacob.”

The only sound for a moment was the crackling of the fire and the banging of pots in the kitchen. Isaac felt light-headed as the words soaked in. “You promised to marry Jake?”

Emmie nodded. “And he intends to hold me to my promise.” She took Isaac's hand in a desperate grip. “He says he'll release me when Gabrielle is a little older. But that means divorcing, and I'm not sure I can enter such a contract in good conscience.”

Isaac was silent and pain squeezed his chest. Honor was never easy, but he'd never expected to be faced with something this hard. He pulled his hand away and stood. “I'm going to talk to Jacob.” He pulled on his greatcoat and went to the door. Turning, he stared down at her. “But even if I have to wait a few years to have a home with you, I'll do it, Emmie. I'll never abandon you. Not ever.”

But even as he pulled the door closed behind him, he had a sinking feeling that nothing would ever be put right in this mess.