Read A Is for Abstinence Online
Authors: Kelly Oram
“How’s this for a punch line,” she whispered, wetting her lips as her gaze fell to my mouth. The action made me forget to breathe. “Marry me today, and I’ll stay the night again tonight, only this time instead of asking you to stop, I’ll beg you not to.”
I sucked in a surprise breath and choked on my own spit. The way I grabbed her and devoured her in a kiss was downright animalistic, as primal as my need for her. My hands found her thighs, still beautifully bare, and I groaned.
“We’ll never make it all the way to Las Vegas,” I growled as I pulled her onto my lap.
“The county clerk’s office can do it,” Val gasped.
That sounded a lot closer. Closer was good. “Okay. Let’s go there. Right now.”
“It’s Monday morning. You have rehearsals in a few hours.”
“I’ll call in sick. I believe I just came down with something that’s going to take at least a week to recover from.”
“I don’t have anything to wear.”
“We’ll find a mall on the way. And now I really do get to pick the panties.”
We didn’t waste any time
. We filled out the marriage license application online and scheduled the first available appointment for the ceremony. It gave us just enough time to stop and buy an outfit for Val to wear. I’d tried to convince her to marry me wearing just my dress shirt, but was unsuccessful.
We stopped at Macy’s and while Val was trying on a few different dresses, I bought out half of the lingerie section. There was just too much good stuff. All the lace and the silk was hard to say no to. Everything seemed like it would look good on Val.
Before we knew it, we were at the county clerk’s office. My knee bounced as I sat in the waiting room, Val squirming in her chair next to me. “Nervous?” I asked curiously.
I was surprised by the irritated look I got in response. “Not nervous. I’m uncomfortable because I’m wearing a
thong
, Kyle,” she grumbled as she shifted in her seat again.
“Mm,” I agreed appreciatively. “A black, lacy one, I know. I picked it out.” I reached over to trail my fingers on her thigh. It was covered now, unfortunately, as Val had chosen a calf-length purple sundress to get married in today. “I can’t wait to see it on you.”
I got an eye roll for that, and she swatted my hand away when it got a little too close to the item of clothing in question. “For future reference, I’m not really a fan of the thong. They’re a little too trashy and extremely uncomfortable.”
I leaned over to murmur against her ear. “Then it’s a good thing I plan to take it off of you very soon.”
She hissed my name, embarrassed, but forgot her irritation when I kissed the sensitive spot on her neck just behind her ear. Her eyes fluttered shut and she sucked in a sharp breath. It drove me insane with desire. If one kiss could do that to her, I couldn’t wait to see how she handled everything else I planned to do to her.
My thoughts turned once again to our post Get Married plans. I trailed my lips along her jaw and captured her mouth with mine. The way she kissed me back, I could tell she was as ready as I was. For a second, we both forgot we were in public.
We pulled apart at the sound of a cleared throat and sheepishly smiled up at the large woman in her mid-fifties frowning down at us. “I take it you two are the kids with the marriage appointment?”
And cue the dopey grins. “Yes, ma’am.”
For some reason, the woman didn’t seem as excited about that as I was. “You have your marriage license?”
I pulled the paper out of my pocket and proudly handed it over. “Fresh off the press.”
She scanned the document and sighed. “Follow me.”
It was a short trip to the room they set aside for weddings, but it felt like it took an eternity to get there. It was a small room that could hold up to thirty people tops, but considering it was just Val, me, and the county appointed official, it would do the job just fine. There a few rows of plastic chairs set up on either side of the room that created an aisle up the middle leading to a small podium. Behind the podium was a small lattice archway covered with fake flowers. It was the room’s only decoration.
The man destined to marry us met us at the door. He was a short man with a full head of silver-gray hair wearing a crisp suit and a red power tie. So government, but at least he had a genuine smile for us. “Welcome! Come on in, don’t be shy.”
Val snickered at that. As if she thought the idea of me being shy about anything ever was funny.
The man greeted both of us with hearty handshakes. “I’m Gordon Pierce, and I’ll have the pleasure of uniting you in holy matrimony today.”
“Sounds good to me, Gordon,” I said. “Thanks for seeing us on such short notice. Make it quick, and we’ll throw a tip in there for you.”
Gordon chuckled. “In a hurry, son?”
“More than you know. We’ve been waiting.”
Gordon’s brows pulled low over his eyes. “Waiting for what?”
I was going to let Val say it, but she blushed and looked away so I chucked my arm around her shoulder and explained. “We’ve waited for marriage to, uh, you know…”
I wriggled my eyebrows at Gordon and gave him a huge smile. His eyebrows flew toward the ceiling and he chuckled. “I see. Well, good for you two.”
“It’s been a very long wait. Four
years
.”
Gordon looked back and forth between us and laughed again. “Okay then, I guess you
are
in a hurry. We’ll make it quick. Do you have anyone to witness?”
I’d forgotten about that. I turned around and smiled at the lovely woman who’d escorted us here and gave her my best smile. “Wanda?” I asked, glancing at her name tag. “Feel like being a bridesmaid today?”
I even batted my eyelashes for her and still no smile. Maybe she wasn’t capable of one. “It’s a thirty dollar fee for the county to provide a witness,” she said.
I pulled some cash from my wallet. I handed over the thirty dollars, then held up an extra fifty and my phone. “Want to play videographer, too?”
She looked at the cash, then back at me. “You want me to tape your wedding on your cell phone for fifty bucks?”
“Is that a problem?”
She clearly thought I was crazy, but she snagged the cash out of my hands. She glanced across the room at Gordon, who had gone to the podium up front and was now messing around with the marriage paper Wanda had given him. In a low voice she muttered, “Sugar, for fifty bucks I’d kiss your fine-looking little white ass.”
Val and I blinked and both burst into laughter. “She smiles!” I cheered when I saw Wanda’s lips curve up. “You’re a beautiful woman, Wanda. You should keep that smile on your face more often.”
Wanda blushed and she shooed up toward the front of the room. “Go on, you crazy lovebirds. Go get married and get out of here before you make the whole building start smiling.”
We didn’t have to be told twice. We walked up the small aisle to the podium where Gordon was now waiting for us. Wanda walked around next to Gordon so she could get a clear shot of Val and me with my phone. I winked at her and she blew me a kiss.
“Should I step aside and let you the two of you have a go at this instead?” Val teased.
She started to step back, but I grabbed her and pulled her to me. “Don’t even think about it. You’re here, and you’re finally mine, and you will say ‘I do’ today—even if I have to tickle torture it out of you.”
Gordon laughed. “I suppose we should get to it, then.”
“The short version,” I reminded him. My hands on Val’s waist were already starting to wander. “The Missus and I have plans after this.” I squeezed her tighter. “Lots and lots and lots of hot, steamy, wild, sexy plans.”
Both Val and Gordon blinked at me. “Sorry. Brain’s a little preoccupied at the moment.”
Gordon shook off his bewilderment and focused. “Okay, the extremely short version. Do either of you have vows you’d like to exchange?”
I looked at Val and she looked at me. “I do?” she offered.
I smiled. She’d told me before that she lacked creativity and was horrible with words, but those two, right then, were perfect. “I definitely do,” I promised.
We both looked back at Gordon with expectant faces. “How was that?” I asked.
He gave us another baffled smile and chuckled. “Very…functional. Do you have rings?”
Oops. Val and I looked at each other again and I saw the laughter in her eyes as she scrunched up her face. “We forgot about the rings.”
I cut a glance to Gordon. “Are rings necessary to make it legal?”
For a second, I was afraid we were going to have to come back later. I’d have asked Wanda for some paper clips or tape or even a piece of gum—anything I could wrap around my finger. But then Gordon laughed again and shook his head. “They’re just traditional.”
I let out a breath of relief so big that even Wanda laughed at me. “Awesome. We’ll get the rings later. What’s next?”
Gordon smiled. “By the power vested in me by the state of California, I pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the—okay, I see you already figured that much out.”
Val and I laughed against each other’s mouths, but we didn’t break our kiss. I squeezed my arms around her and she jumped up, wrapping her legs around my waist. I spun her in circles once or twice, our kiss getting more and more heated until Wanda cleared her throat again. We turned our faces and smiled for the camera. “Congratulations, you crazy kids.”
“Thanks, Wanda.”
I kissed Val one more time for good measure and then set her back on her feet. It was time to get out of there.
“You’re all set,” Gordon promised. “You’ll receive the official marriage certificate in the mail within two weeks. Congratulations; I think that was the shortest wedding I’ve ever performed.”
“It was perfect,” Val said.
The emotion in her voice caught me by surprise and a big lump formed in my throat when I looked over to see her eyes shiny with happy tears. “I love you,” she whispered.
“I love you more,” I promised and pulled her into my arms again, suddenly needing another kiss. “Let’s get out of here.”
For once, Val answered that request with a smile and a nod. “Let’s.”
“Good luck!” Gordon called as we left the room. He winked at Val and she turned bright red again. I gave her a wicked smile and said, “Luck will have nothing to do with it.”
We got all the way back to our car before we found ourselves at another loss. There was one more part of this brilliant plan we hadn’t thought of ahead of time. “Where do you want to go?” I asked as we buckled ourselves in. “I’ll take you anywhere in the world you want to go…tomorrow. I need you sooner than that today. Marina Del Rey is close, or I know a great resort over the border in TJ.”
Val grabbed my hand over the center console. “Why don’t we just go back to your place?” she said. “Honestly, it’s nicer than any hotel, the view is unbeatable, it’s stocked with food, and the pool and hot tub are private.”
I blinked at her, hardly able to believe such a perfect woman existed.
“And now that I have a lifetime supply of slutty underwear,” she continued, “we shouldn’t have to leave for days.”
“It’s
sexy
underwear,” I corrected, “and you are brilliant. Home it is.”
The drive back to Malibu felt longer than my last ten months of abstinence combined, but I knew it was worth it the minute I pulled into the driveway and realized that my house was no longer just my house. It was
our
house. Val gave me a questioning look when I didn’t pull the car into the garage. “I have to do this right,” I told her.
We walked to the front door, and as soon as it was unlocked I swept Val into my arms. “Welcome home, Mrs. Hamilton,” I said as I carried her over the threshold.
The gesture made Val’s eyes tear up again. I leaned in to kiss her, and the way she responded shocked me. She kissed me like she’d never kissed me before. Apparently, she’d always been holding back until now. She put everything she had into that kiss—lips, tongue, arms, legs, body, heart, mind, passion, and more lust than I knew she was capable of. She literally brought me to my knees and I almost took her right there on the entryway tile.