A Dark Beginning: A China Dark Novel (4 page)

00:05: Tarb4u : Are you there??

00:10: Tarb4u : Don’t ignore me

00:10: Tarb4u : This was your idea

00:12: HornEnvy : I’m not ignoring you

00:12: HornEnvy : I’m not sure if we’ll get away with it

00:12: HornEnvy : She won’t fall for it

00:12: Tarb4u : She will. She won’t get away from me now

00:14: HornEnvy : I don’t know, I really don’t know if it’s a good idea

00:15: HornEnvy : What if we’re caught

00:17: Tarb4u : Hey. I’ve got plenty of other women I can be working on

00:18: Tarb4u : Don’t fuck with me

00:18: Tarb4u : That’s my job

00:20: HornEnvy : If you think you can pull this off, then go for it

00:20: Tarb4u : A walk in the park, mate

That Friday evening Philip and China shared a nice bottle of wine and talked about children. They hadn’t spoken about the subject since China had discovered her infertility almost two years ago but the wine loosened their tongues and they sank together into the large sofa and, with broken voices, discussed the unthinkable.

“You would have loved children wouldn’t you, though?” China said, looking deep into Philips sad eyes. “I’m so sorry that I can’t give them to you.”

“It’s true I would have liked children.” China knew he was playing down his desire. The word ‘like’ was a gross understatement. He’d been as keen as her in the early days, discussing all aspects of parenthood, how many children they would have had, what their names would have been, what colour they would have decorated the bedrooms. “But it’s not your fault, and your love to me is more important than children. I can accept that some things are just not meant to be.”

“You won’t leave me will you?” Tears were starting to blur her vision, stinging her eyes as the wine was messing with her self control.

“Of course not. Never. There is nothing that would make me leave you.” He looked earnestly into her eyes, willing the truth of his statement into her consciousness with fierce intensity.

She let a bitter laugh escape as her insecurity bit down harder. “I’m not sure that’s true. I bet there are a few things I could do that would make you leave me.”

“Seriously no. It would have to be you leaving me. I couldn’t think of a single thing that you could do that would make me leave you.”

“What about if I killed someone?” She was trying to take their minds off the earlier maudlin conversation, desperate to leave so much sadness and emptiness behind, but just ended up scuttling towards even darker subjects.

“I’d stand by you. They’d probably have deserved it anyway,” he laughed.

“Ok, what about if I emptied our bank account to buy designer bags?”

“I might be a bit peeved,” he responded. “But it wouldn’t be worth leaving you over. I’d wait until we had some more money and then buy myself a new BMW M5. I figure you would owe me.”

She slapped his arm, “A new BMW is a bit more expensive than a couple of designer bags. You’re escalating, not matching!”

“You started it.” He held her shoulders and pushed her back into the sofa. He kissed her damp cheeks and then gently on the lips.

She felt a flush of excitement, a stark contrast to the earlier sadness. “Ok then. What if I had an affair?”

He kissed her again, a little harder this time. He whispered to her. “I’d forgive you.”

A heat was growing low down in her belly as the tip of his tongue touched her lips, and then he kissed her again, parting her lips slightly so his tongue could find hers. “Even if he was better looking than you?” she teased when he stopped kissing her. He drew back a bit and looked into her eyes, startled. A smile grew on his face.

“I’d expect you to pick someone good looking anyway. You’d deserve the best.”

“And what if I have seen someone already?” she asked, for once enjoying his game. The earlier, miserable conversation was being forgotten, and the contrasting feelings of lustful play were intensified as she stoked her husband’s desire.

“Have you?” he asked breathlessly.

“I might have,” she responded and lifted her head to gently nip and tug at his lower lip. She released him and then stretched up to kiss him again. He looked adoringly into her eyes and pressed his mouth hard against hers. She could feel his lust through his jeans, pressing against her thigh.

“You can do whatever you want, my love.”

As he said that a strong vision of those multi-hued, jade eyes flashed across her mind and with that reality remorse hit. “I’m sorry, Philip, you know I’m just teasing. I couldn’t hurt you.”

But Philip wasn’t finished with the game. Maybe she had pushed too far this time, crashed through a barrier, for both herself and Philip. “If you thought you were hurting me, which you wouldn’t be by the way, you could have the affair and just not tell me about it.”

This threw China. The one constant element throughout he talked about his fantasy had been that he always wanted to know in great detail about whatever China might get up to. In fact, not only had he always wanted to be told about any apparent goings on, but he would really prefer to be able to watch. “But that’s not what you’ve said before, Philip,” she pushed him back slightly so she could look into his eyes, watching them closely, checking his integrity. “You’ve always said you would want to know about anything that might happen.”

“Don’t you realize, China, just the simple thought that you might be having an affair is enough to turn me on? The very fact that you might cheat on me gets me hard.” As if to emphasize this he pressed firmer against her thigh and she could tell he wasn’t lying.

“You need to be careful what you wish for, Philip,” she whispered as she kissed him again. Was he really giving her the go ahead to have an actual affair, not just a fantasy one, just as she had started to think about another man for the first time? Effectively he was absolving her of the guilt of constantly thinking about Mark’s broad shoulders, his flat stomach, and those perfect buttocks. She pressed her thighs together and felt an electric shock of pleasure as Philip planted his next kiss just below her ear.

“My only wish is for you to be happy. Fully satisfied.”

“Then satisfy me, Philip.”

They had never made love on the sofa before, so this was a first. It somehow felt dirtier and more exciting. Having sex rather than making love, she corrected, downstairs rather than in the sanctity of their bedroom. Clothes were ripped off and thrown about the room with laughter and abandon, the foreplay was longer and more carefully executed than in their early dating days. China had to admit that Philip was trying his hardest to fulfil her latest demand. When she was looking down at the top of his head as he serviced her with languorous sweeps of his tongue, her mind couldn’t help but picture what it would be like if the hair she so tightly entangled her fingers into was curly and raven black instead of mousey blonde. For the first time she didn’t feel guilty about these sinful thoughts. She let those delicious images wash over her as each stroke of his tongue, each smearing kiss, massaged her pleasure. After all, he had given her permission to think about another man, and now she was starting to believe him. The nagging doubt that this was still just a fantasy for Philip, but that she was shamelessly utilising his desperation for her participation in his role-play games to justify her temptation, was a fading voice.

20:15: Tarb4u : Sooo close now

20:15: Tarb4u : I can almost taste her

20:15: Tarb4u : Green light?

20:20: HornEnvy : Green light

After a remarkable Friday, and an unremarkable but perfectly pleasant weekend, the working week arrived with a depressing thud. China hadn’t thought about Mark since the Friday night session with Philip, and was pleased that her Kindle book was finally getting some much-needed attention.

Devak brought her coffee to the table and she glanced at her watch. 11:45.

“Thank you, Devak. How are you today?”

Devak stopped and looked at her, seriously assessing her mood. Then he smiled. It was sincere and kind, as always. She had missed that smile. “I am fine, lady. More importantly, how are you? I feel that last week you weren’t really here.”

She laughed lightly. Although this question and statement brought a very brief image of Mark to mind she was able to quickly dismiss it. “That’s true, Devak, I’m sorry. I was just a little stressed out over work,” she lied.

“Well, I hope that whatever was stressing you out is now resolved. I do not like to see my lovely lady without a smile on her face.”

“Ahh, Devak, you can always bring a smile to my face.”

He blushed and his smile grew even broader. “You are teasing me, lady, but I do not mind if it makes you smile.”

“I’m sorry, Devak, I don’t mean to tease. Sometimes a lady just can’t help herself.” She was aware that she was flirting with this harmless man.

Devak quickly dismissed her provocative play with a brief, almost camp flutter of his hand, but as he turned away he was beaming happily.

“Hello. Don’t I recognize you from somewhere.” The voice jolted her out of her reverie. Startled she turned and her heart stopped for a second as she looked up into eyes of emerald green. He raised his big hands and mimed snapping a picture. His arrogant grin revealed straight white teeth and his voice rumbled with antipodean machismo as he said, “Well, where do I know you from?”

Flustered, she guiltily glanced down at her open bag. She knew he couldn’t see the card that lay casually amongst the chaos within but she felt as if those eyes could see everything, through the leather of a bag, through her skin and into her betraying mind, scouring her thoughts.

“I don’t know. Maybe I look like someone else you know.” She tried not to make eye contact as she knew that if she did she would be rendered either a babbling fool or a virtual mute. Neither option would be very attractive.

He clapped his hands together loudly, making her jump and finally look up into his face. “I know,” he exclaimed. “You were on the train the other day, weren’t you? I couldn’t forget that.”

His blatant complement sent her into a spin of excitement and guilt. She was a married woman, and this handsome, very handsome she corrected, young Australian was openly telling her that she was unforgettable. Sub-consciously she pulled her silk scarf up around her chin. “I’m sure you say that to lots of strange women in cafes. Strange, married, women.” She tried to instil some indignant irritation into her voice but was struggling to find words without stuttering or talking nonsense. She wanted to be anywhere else right now. Even being back at work would have been preferable to this mortal embarrassment.

He laughed, a rich sound that vibrated through her core and sent thrilling shivers all through her body. “You’re too hard on yourself. You’re not that strange.” He glanced down at her hand. “But I can see you are
that
married. I’m sorry if I’ve embarrassed you.” There was an undertow of Irish accent behind the thunder of Australia, which meant his voice almost sang the words. “I’ll leave you in peace. For now”

Those last two words scared her. What did he mean by ‘for now’? Was he planning on talking to her again? If he was she had better make a better account of herself next time. He must think she was an imbecile, a mouse of a woman, using a wedding band as a shield where words failed her.

As Mark walked off China realized that she knew his name but he did not know hers, and she wanted him to know her name. Why, she didn’t really know, but she felt that he should at least know the name of the woman he was sending into a tail-spin of emotions.

Devak came over to her table with a concerned look on his face. He looked with displeasure at Mark’s retreating form. “Are you ok, lady? That man wasn’t bothering you was he?”

“Nothing I can’t handle,” she said.

“If he is a nuisance I will do something about it. I cannot have my dedicated and loyal customers bothered by riff-raff.” He looked quite upset and his chest was puffed out in a display of indignant protectiveness.

China couldn’t help laughing at the polite old-fashioned phrases Devak used. His eyes showed a sparkle of anger and his lips were pressed tightly together as if to hold back any further vocalisations of annoyance. “Seriously, Devak,” she said placing a hand on his tense arm. “He just thought he knew me. He doesn’t know me. Not at all.” She wasn’t sure if she was trying to reassure Devak or herself, but this tiny defiance made her feel a little more in control. She paid Devak what she owed and strolled confidently back to work, thinking about Mark all the way and admonishing herself. He could only be in his mid twenties, younger than her by some margin. She was punching well above her weight if she thought she could attract someone with such classically chiselled good looks. That sort of thing just did not happen to her. But she couldn’t help the warm feeling of pleasure that came with knowing that this strange, but beautiful, young man had in fact paid her some attention.

That afternoon very little work got done. She daydreamed her way through the hours until the commute home. Mark featured heavily in these fancies, although she finished each episode by putting him firmly in place with a witty riposte to which there was no possible comeback, he would slink off, a broken man, and she would head home to her waiting husband, informing him in some detail of how she had put a flagrant womanizer in his place. Someone who would not forget China Dark in a hurry.