A Better Man (The Men of Halfway House) (23 page)

Julian lay splayed on the bed, one arm out to the side, the other bent, covering his face. One of his legs lay limply next to Matt and the other, slightly bent at the knee, hung loosely on the side of the bed.

He was absolutely breathtaking. Matt carefully withdrew from Julian, unable to see his face hiding beneath his arm.

"You okay?"

"Uh-huh," Julian murmured.

Matt gently rubbed Julian's leg. "Is that a good 'uh-huh' or a bad 'uh-huh'?"

Julian moved the arm covering his face and looked at Matt. He smiled. "You're a pain in my ass," he teased then laughed.

Matt slapped Julian's leg and stood to go wash up. "Stay here, I'll be right back," he said, grinning.

He returned with a washcloth to find Julian in the exact same position as a few moments before. He methodically wiped where needed and tossed the towel into the bathroom.

Julian peeked at him from under his arm, which had found its place over his face again. Matt slowly crept up Julian's body until he hovered over him. Julian reached up and pulled Matt in for a lazy, slow kiss then wrapped his other arm around Matt's waist and pulled his body down, pressing it against his own.

When they parted, Matt raised himself a little and rested his weight on his forearms. He brushed his thumbs on Julian's cheeks and smiled, enjoying the feel of Julian's fingers softly tracing up and down his back. The primitive side of Matt couldn't resist kissing Julian possessively.

"You're mine," he whispered between kisses.

Julian chuckled. "Always," he said before pulling Matt down against his chest.

Matt felt the exhaustion of the day begin to take over. The steady, strong beat of Julian's heart slowly lulled him to sleep. He thought about his earlier conversation with his parents. His entire life, he had been forced to hide behind a façade in order to protect the family name and business. He had endured a personal torture with endless sacrifice for others.

He was tired of playing that role.

The halfway house was on schedule and it seemed they would soon have their first resident. Matt was going to make a difference in this world—on his terms—with Julian standing by his side whether his parents liked it or not. It was finally time to come out to his parents.

"Don't think so much, I can practically hear your wheels turning," Julian said.

Julian knew him well. Matt's grin spread. "I love you," he said, burrowing up to find his usual resting spot on Julian's shoulder.

"I love you more," Julian whispered softly as he continued to stroke Matt's back.

Matt couldn't imagine anything better than this inner peace he felt in Julian's arms. He felt free, confident, wanted, and loved. As sleep began to slowly take him, he imagined this was how someone felt when they wanted to scream from the rooftops to declare their love for another.

He finally understood.

Chapter 17

Julian pressed the keys on the gate control as Matt rattled off each number of the security code. Immediately, the grinding of the heavy metal gates sliding open made him feel as if he were about to step into an episode of the
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
. The gates finally opened to reveal this huge…thing.

"Matt, is that your house?" Julian asked suspiciously.

"It's my
parents'
house," Matt corrected.

Julian whistled.
Shit, you could fit about a dozen halfway houses in there or more.

"You grew up here?" Julian asked as he drove past the open gates.

"Yeah," Matt responded quietly. "Many generations of my family have lived in this house. I guess you can say it's a hand-me-down," he said rather casually. "Alex and I call it the mausoleum."

Old money. No question about it. Julian knew enough about construction and architecture to recognize this as a Renaissance Revival style. The two-story mansion had an off-white, smooth stone exterior and a dark regal blue low-pitched roof. The house looked like a mirror image of itself connected with an arched walkway in-between. Each corner of the house was decorated with a variety of quoins and the windows were ornately carved, some with stone column balconies. All surrounded by an endless layer of perfectly manicured landscaping.

"You can park over there where my brother's car is," Matt directed.

Julian drove his six-year-old Dodge Ram truck and parked it next to the Bentley Continental GTC. Just because he couldn't afford the damn thing didn't mean he didn't know what it was. As if that wasn't bad enough, he saw a Rolls-Royce Phantom parked in the garage getting wiped down by someone. Driver, probably? He didn't want to know.

He turned off the engine and looked over to Matt. He had the worry crease in the middle of his eyebrows as he looked over to the house.

"Hey, you okay?" Julian asked.

"Um, yeah, I guess," Matt muttered.

"It's going to be fine."

Matt gave a nervous laugh. "There's a reason I haven't come out to them." He closed his eyes and rested his head back against the headrest.

"Do you want to keep hiding it?" Julian asked.

"No," Matt calmly responded.

"Do you want them to keep pushing your buttons, keep getting pissed off because you are hiding the halfway house too?"

"I see your point," Matt responded, looking over to him. "Thanks for coming with me." He reached over to place his hand on Julian's thigh. "I really need to just have you by my side tonight."

"I'm here. If you need me to punch someone out or something, just say the word," Julian teased.

Matt laughed. "Nah, I'm good. Let's get this over with," he said as they both got out of the truck.

Julian walked up to the house with Matt, making sure to keep a safe
friend
distance between them. No sense letting the cat out of the bag before Matt made his announcement.

The housekeeper opened the door.

"Hello, Lucia," Matt greeted her with an embrace.

"
Hola
, Matthew," she responded with a warm smile. "I have missed you very much."

"This is Julian," he said as they walked into the house. "He's a friend of mine."

"Nice to meet you," she said politely with a knowing smile.

"Pleasure, ma'am," Julian responded.

She directed them to a room where muffled voices echoed. The house's interior was as impressive as the outside. As Julian passed the spiral staircase, the mural walls, marble flooring, and gold accents, one thing became blazingly clear to him—this was not the real Matt. He may have been raised in this house, but Matt's true self had not been cultured in this shell. This was a museum, not a home. It was a status symbol, polished with the finest materials and trimmings money could buy.

"Hello, darling," said the woman with the pearls and perfectly pressed dress to match her perfectly styled hair.

"Hello, Mom."

Julian watched as Matt dutifully bent and pecked his mother's cheek. She looked over to Julian, assessing him with obvious disapproval. She glanced back at Matt and straightened his tie.

"Darling, a dress shirt and tie is not appropriate attire for a dinner," she scolded.

"It's just us for dinner, Mom." Matt turned toward him. "Mom, this is Julian, he's a friend of mine," he said, smiling.

Julian walked up to her and extended his hand in greeting.

She placed her hand on her chest and looked at his as if it were covered in some radioactive substance.

He tried to ignore the way she snubbed him and simply responded as he thought he should. "Pleasure to meet you, ma'am." He retracted his hand.

Matt looked over at him, his smile gone. He mouthed the word 'sorry'.

They turned as new people entered the room. A young man with an attractive woman by his side and an older gentleman. Julian guessed this was Alex and his fiancée along with Matt's dad. They were laughing, obviously at the tail end of a conversation that must have started in the other room. They saw Matt and Julian and immediately came over to greet them.

"Hey, Matt," Alex said with a hug and back slap.

His fiancée welcomed Matt with a smile and a kiss on the cheek.

Matt's father gave a quick hug and a "Hi, Son."

Julian wasn't sure what to do or what was expected so he simply stayed exactly where he was until directed otherwise.

"This is Julian, he's a friend," Matt said, bringing on a spotlight of attention.

Matt placed his hand on his father's shoulder and looked at Julian. "This is my dad."

Matt's father stepped forward and extended his hand in greeting.

"Pleasure to meet you, sir," Julian responded with a firm handshake.

"This is Alex, my brother," Matt introduced, "and his fiancée, Lindy."

"Hi there," Alex said with a wave.

Lindy gave Julian a peck on the cheek and quietly whispered, "Bet they gave you shit about not wearing a suit?"

She retreated with a bold smile and Julian couldn't help but smile right back. He liked her. She obviously didn't share the same mold as Matt's family.

After a few moments of awkward silence, another person appeared in the room from the right to make an announcement. "Dinner is served."

Seriously? A fucking butler?

It was such a cliché, something straight out of a Beverly Hills movie. The large formal dining room table, pristinely decorated with candelabras and gold fixtures. Each place setting with more silver polished utensils than courses Julian could think to eat. He casually looked up at the vaulted ceilings only to discover another mural of angels and heavenly images, no doubt an attempt to mimic the Sistine Chapel.

Everyone took their designated seats at the table, with Matt signaling Julian to sit next to him, which he gladly did. Julian noticed Matt was unusually quiet, as if intentionally trying to avoid any attention. He seemed uncomfortable, the pallor of his skin a clear indicator he was worried, maybe even anxious. Julian casually reached under the table and gently rubbed Matt's thigh, not to arouse, more hoping to provide a little comfort.

Matt closed his eyes and took a deep breath. After a few seconds, he opened his eyes and looked over to Julian with a hint of a smile and a little more color on his face. "Thanks," he whispered.

Julian responded with a ghost of a smile only Matt would recognize and immediately looked around, thankful no one had noticed their brief exchange.

Everyone seemed to be in their own little world. Alex and Lindy were the most animated, talking about wedding plans, flowers, and all kinds of other shit Julian didn't care about. Matt's father quietly sat at the table eating his dinner, trying to avoid the discussion as much as Matt. He was obviously a man of few words. The plastic lady with the pearls intently listened to the wedding plans and occasionally looked over to Matt.

"Darling, sit up straight," she scolded Matt as if he were a child.

What the fuck?
This was all surreal. The way his mother spoke to him, chastised Matt—all in an effort to humiliate him—was ridiculous. There was no mistaking her intentions. The plastic bitch's mission was to make Matt miserable, to make him feel like shit.

Julian's anger began to rise. He became restless, his leg jumping. Matt had briefly given him a heads up of what Julian could expect, but actually seeing the roles in action made him twitch. He hated this. Hated to see the way these people treated Matt, the way he was discarded, ignored. Knowing Matt and his good heart, he probably thought it was appropriate to grin and bear it, tolerate it for the sake of respect of authority, of his parents, and what family was supposed to mean. He wasn't sure how normal families were expected to behave, but he was sharp enough to know this was wrong. It was all wrong.

Matt's father didn't say a word. He just sat there, ate his dinner, and occasionally looked over to Matt. Matt tried to keep his head down as much as possible. He was miserable. Julian just wanted to grab him, throw him over his shoulder, and take him out of this toxic environment.

Suddenly Matt's mother clasped her hands together and smiled. "That is wonderful, honey." She beamed. "Did you hear that, sweetheart?" she asked her husband.

Matt's father finally looked up and raised his eyebrows, probably hoping they'd repeat what he had missed.

The plastic lady was obviously peeved he'd been ignoring the conversation. "They are having the wedding at the Regal Country Club. Isn't that fantastic?" she asked.

Matt's father simply smiled, with effort.

These family dynamics were odd. Alex seemed to be pushing for approval, Lindy looked as if she was forcing a smile, Matt's father looked as miserable as Matt.

Julian was most concerned with the change in Matt's demeanor. Matt's nostrils began to flare and he clenched his jaw. His breathing was steady, but it was obviously a controlled effort. Matt grabbed Julian's hand underneath the table. Their fingers entwined and Julian felt Matt's strong hold. He was tense, anxious, probably about to lose it.

"Mom, Dad," Matt began, breaking into the conversation. "There's something I need to tell you."

If the look on her face after Matt's interruption was any indication, this was the last thing the plastic lady was going to want to happen at her perfectly pristine dinner party.