A Beautiful Mess (8 page)

“That was beautiful,” Alexander said, breaking Olivia’s stream of thought.

“How did you get in here?” She looked at him, crossing her arms defensively.

“I rang the doorbell and you didn’t answer. I was worried something had happened to you. Your door was unlocked, so I let myself in. Then I heard you playing the piano and singing. I just had to listen to you.”

He took a step forward, brushing a wayward strand of hair behind Olivia’s ear, his hand lingering, trying to keep his eyes trained on her face. Her legs looked amazing in the short navy and white striped sundress she wore that she accented with coral jewelry. He thought about how it would feel to have those long legs wrapped around him. Snapping out of his thoughts, he smiled. “You’re very talented, you know.”

She blushed at his words, staring down at her feet. “Thank you.” Olivia didn’t take compliments very well, unsure of the reason why. She knew she was talented. She had been singing and performing for as long as she could remember. It was the only thing that truly gave her joy.

“Look at me, Olivia,” Alexander demanded. Olivia snapped her head up, unsure of why she felt the need to obey him. But she did. “You are very talented.” He held her chin in place and stared at those big brown eyes of hers.

“Sorry I didn’t hear the doorbell. It’s hard to hear it up here,” Olivia said, interrupting the building tension that she started to feel all over her body, including between her legs. She turned around and folded the cover over the piano keys, needing to separate herself from Alexander before she invited him straight to her bedroom.

“Are you ready to go?” He held his hand out to her.

“Yes,” she replied, grabbing his hand.

Alexander marveled at how small her hand felt when enveloped in his. They walked out the front door and she turned to lock up. She felt Alexander come up behind her, mere inches away. He whispered in her ear, “Please always remember to lock your front door, even when you’re home. You can’t trust anyone.”

“I thought you said I could trust you.” Olivia turned to face him, remembering his words from a few nights ago. She smirked while she placed her keys in her purse.

“You probably shouldn’t, but I’d like you to.” He smiled a sort of mischievous smile, caressing Olivia’s forehead where her bruise was. She closed her eyes at the contact, enjoying the feeling of Alexander’s hands on her face. Why did a simple touch feel so good? Olivia didn’t want to think about what it would feel like if he were to touch other parts of her body. She thought she would explode.

Alexander stared down at Olivia, both of their breathing becoming heavier. He couldn’t understand the pull that woman had on him. He led a life of few distractions, avoiding all serious relationships, just like Olivia. It was hard to maintain total control when in a relationship. Instead, he would see a few women on occasion. Women who knew and understood his needs. But Olivia made him want to change his mind.

“Do you feel it, too?” he asked, bringing his hand to cup her chin, tilting her head up.

“Yes,” Olivia breathed, her voice husky. She was normally cool, calm, and collected. Around Alexander, she acted like a thirteen-year-old girl who had her first crush.

“Good,” he said, turning and walking down her front steps, opening the back door to the waiting Escalade. Olivia needed to take a minute to steady herself so that she didn’t trip over her feet. Once she was finally confident that she could climb down the stairs without causing serious bodily harm, she joined Alexander on the sidewalk and climbed into the car.

Martin sat at the driver’s seat and greeted Olivia as she entered the SUV. “Good afternoon, Miss Adler.”

“Hello, Martin.”

“Looking forward to the ball game this afternoon?”

“Yes, I am. Thank you.” The door opposite her opened and Alexander sat down, preparing for the short drive. He reached out and grabbed Olivia’s hand.

Her skin really was soft. Alexander could touch her all day. “You look beautiful today, Miss Adler,” he said softly as he stared into her eyes.

“Thank you, Mr. Burnham,” Olivia smirked, thinking about how much she wanted to scream his name.

Alexander brought Olivia’s hand to his lips and kissed it very gently. Her heart raced at the contact from his lips on her body. She stared into his eyes and realized she was falling for that man, as much as she didn’t want that to happen. That was bad. Very, very bad.

O
LIVIA
and Alexander arrived at Beer Works after a longer than normal drive from Olivia’s house. She didn’t live far from Fenway Park, but with all the fans out in the streets for the game, it took a little longer than normal, which was to be expected on game day in Boston.

There was already a line outside, but the doorman saw Alexander and permitted the pair to enter, nodding a greeting to him. As they made their way through the industrial looking microbrewery, Alexander was greeted by more people, shaking hands with some, stopping to take pictures with others. He must have been more well-known than Olivia originally thought.

Olivia had distanced herself so much from the social scene that she didn’t realize she was in the company of a local celebrity. Alexander had recently been named one of the country’s most eligible bachelors by
Esquire
magazine, but that wasn’t something he really bragged about.

They made their way to an empty high top table toward the rear of the large bar and sat down. A server came to take their order of two watermelon ales. As she waited for her drink, Olivia’s mind drifted back to the song she was singing before Alexander arrived. She loved the feeling of sharing a beautiful song with someone. And she felt that she shared that song with Alexander, although she wasn’t aware he was even standing there. She wondered if he was able to figure out the meaning behind the song, about how she lost the few parental figures she had in her life. First when she was six, and then again on the day of her college graduation.

“Penny for your thoughts,” Alexander said, watching Olivia stare out into space, deep in thought, as a server dropped off two watermelon ales complete with watermelon slice.

“Sorry,” she said, returning her eyes to Alexander. “I was just thinking about my college graduation.”

“Oh yeah? What about it?” He took a sip from his beer and Olivia did the same. It was so refreshing.

“Nothing really. Just how it seems so long ago. Thanks for inviting me.” Olivia anxiously wanted to try to steer the conversation toward him and his life.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled at Olivia, staring at her perfect plump lips. He wondered how they tasted. He desperately wanted to find out. But, for once, he wasn’t going to rush this. He could tell that Olivia was someone with a past. If he scared her off, he would regret it. For the first time he could remember, he wanted more than just a one-night stand with someone. And he wondered whether she felt the same way.

Olivia shifted nervously in her seat, taking a sip of beer with her trembling hand, fearful that he would ask too many questions. Questions she didn’t want to answer.

“So, Alexander,” she said, looking into his eyes, breaking the growing tension. “Are you a big Red Sox fan?” She figured that was a safe topic.
Boys love their sports, right?

“I am,” he said, his smile widening. “I spent my summers on the Cape growing up and remember going to games with my Dad when I was little.” Olivia was relieved when he started to share some personal information about himself. She was eager to learn more about the man sitting in front of her, even though she was hesitant to share anything about herself.

“I’ve never actually been to a game inside Fenway,” Olivia said quietly.

“What?” he exclaimed, dumbfounded. “How long have you been living here?”

That was a relatively safe question, so she decided to answer him truthfully. “I went to Boston College for undergrad. I started there about ten years ago. After graduation, I left but I ended up coming back about a year ago.” She smiled, but he could tell there was more to the story. After an awkward silence, Olivia continued talking. “I missed it here and this was the only place that really felt like home.” She tapped her fingernails nervously against the metal table.

“Where did you grow up? I know you’re not from around here, not with that accent.” Alexander had been trying to place her accent all weekend. It had a soft twang to it, particularly when she pronounced certain words.

“Charleston, South Carolina,” Olivia laughed. She looked at Alexander, who seemed to have a perplexed look on his face. “I’m a southern beach bum at heart,” she said, trying to bring the smile back to his face that was there seconds before.

Alexander couldn’t believe she said she grew up in Charleston. He remained silent and stared at her as if he was trying to put a puzzle together.
 

But there was really no puzzle to put together. Olivia was just a girl from South Carolina who lost her family and wanted to start over.

Before she could ask him another question and keep the attention off her, he asked, “How about your parents? Are they still in Charleston?” He needed to know. He needed the back-story. Too many pieces were falling into place. There had been too many coincidences. The age. The name. Where she grew up. The music. Most of all, the music.

She froze after Alexander’s question. That was the part about forming relationships Olivia hated. She despised the look she received when she told people that her parents were killed in a car crash when she was only six and too young to remember. Alexander looked at her with intense eyes. She started breathing quick and fast. It felt like the room was closing in on her.

She needed to get out of there. “I’ll be right back,” she said, stumbling out of her chair and trying to act as normal as possible. “Nature calls.”

Alexander watched as Olivia practically ran away from the table, not knowing how to react to what just happened. She clearly had a panic attack. All he did was ask about her parents. That was another piece of the puzzle falling too easily into place. What happened to her parents? He needed to know.

Safe in the ladies room, Olivia took a minute to calm her breathing, splashing some water on her face and willing her heart to stop beating so quickly. She had never figured out why she panicked when people asked about her parents. Her therapist seemed to think that Olivia was repressing some memories about them; memories that were painful, causing her to react that way. The doctor was obviously full of it, according to Olivia, because she had very few memories of her parents.

As she stared at her face in the mirror, Olivia was unaware how much time had passed since she abruptly left Alexander at the table. Slowly opening the door to the bathroom, she saw piercing green eyes staring back at her. Alexander grabbed her arm, leading her down the hallway, his face awash with concern. “Are you okay?”

“Oh no,” Olivia spat out, crossing her arms. “You don’t get to go all Navy SEAL interrogation specialist on me.” He gave Olivia a questioning look. “That’s right. I Googled you.”

Alexander softened the intense look he was giving Olivia. “I bet you did,” he smirked, raising an eyebrow. She couldn’t help but to laugh in response. And not just a small polite laugh, but a gut-splitting, all-consuming laugh.
This feels good
, Olivia thought to herself.

That sound was like music to Alexander’s ears. He decided right then and there that he would do everything in his power to make sure he could hear that sweet melody as often as possible. He pulled Olivia into his arms, stroking her hair, whispering, “Top ten favorite sounds.”

Holy crap! He feels good
, Olivia said to herself as she nuzzled her face against Alexander’s broad chest, listening to his heart race. Hers was racing, too.
She turned her chin up and stared into his eyes, feeling so small enveloped in his arms. He licked his lips and Olivia was certain he was going to kiss her.

Alexander gazed down at the beautiful woman in his arms. He wanted to kiss her so badly. She was asking for it, pleading for it with her eyes. With her mouth. Should he kiss her, even given his suspicions? What if he was right and it’s her?

After a few intense seconds, he exhaled loudly, shaking his head, and released Olivia from his embrace, grabbing her hand to go back to the table.

Olivia was confused. Maybe he wasn’t as attracted to her as she was to him. He was so sweet and caring one second, and the next she couldn’t read his behavior. He was almost cold and removed.

They sat back down at the table where another round of beer awaited them.

“I ordered another round. I hope you don’t mind.” He glanced at Olivia, but didn’t hold her gaze.

“I’m sorry about that. I mean before, when I, well…”

“When you had a near panic attack?” He raised his eyebrow, taking a sip from his beer.

“I can’t hide anything from you, can I?”

Alexander remained silent, not prodding her, but Olivia knew he wanted an explanation. After a few brief seconds and several gulps of liquid courage, Olivia took a deep breath before telling Alexander about herself. “I don’t really have as many panic attacks as I used to. Talking about my parents usually triggers them.”

“I’m sorry,” he responded. “I didn’t know. I would never have asked you about them if I knew it would harm you in any way. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Olivia.” The soft look was back in his eyes. Mr. Warm, Caring, and Compassionate was back. Olivia wanted him to stay. And she wanted to be the reason he had that sparkle in his eyes.

She continued to share some personal information with him. Information that took her years to share with Kiera and Mo, but something about Alexander seemed so familiar, as if he knew her story. “They were killed when I was six. Car accident. I don’t remember anything. I think what hurts the most is that I can barely remember anything about my life before the accident, and I’ve tried. God damn it, I’ve tried so hard,” she trembled as she took a deep breath. “The one thing I do remember is they never called me Sarah. I have no memory of that ever being my name. But I do remember my dad calling me Livvy.” Tears threatened to spill down her face. “I was in the car when it happened. But I survived somehow.” She thought about telling him about the boy with green eyes she had been seeing in her dreams the past few nights, but she couldn’t be sure that he actually existed. None of it made any sense.