31 Days of Autumn (43 page)

‘Never
doubted it for a minute, there’s a reason you’re held in such high esteem in
the legal world,’ I replied. ‘Thanks again.’

‘You’re
welcome.’

As promised, he
sent me the number and I called his son immediately. We’d only met a couple of
times, the last time being on his wedding day a few years ago. He’d stayed in
the boathouse for a few days over Christmas before heading on his honeymoon. He
was obviously surprised to hear from me and I explained my relationship with
his father, then mentioned the situation with Ellie. Naturally, given the press
attention, he was aware. Despite my best intentions, and all the money I’d
offered, I hadn’t been able to keep it out of the papers. It wasn’t just the
four mercenaries that had died, or Jenny and Thomas, but also the poor guy who
just happened to own the cottage where James and one of the kidnappers had had
their showdown. Gabriel agreed to meet, but asked if I’d mind going to his
house. His wife was away with her best friend on a spa break and he was in
charge of the children, who I could hear in the background, which made me smile
sadly. If I was separated from mine, I’d miss them terribly, not to mention
Ellie.

When I hit
the motorway, I put my foot down, eager for his wisdom. Anything to keep me
from losing my family. I just had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that if I
gave in and let Ellie have the space she seemed to want, she’d drift even
further from me. She’d shut down, just like I’d done, and there may be a chance
that I’d never get her back.

Ellie

‘Where’s
Dan?’ Brooke asked as she hugged me tightly.

‘Working,’ I
lied, not sure where he was. Andy had disappeared in a panic after telling me
that Dan had driven off with no backup. It wasn’t like he’d get very far before
Andy found him, not now that he’d got one of those tracking systems in his
neck, like Oliver had.

‘You seem
tense,’ Molly observed as she gave me a hug, too.

‘I’m having
good and bad days, today’s not so great. The thought of going home is cheering
me up though,’ I smiled.

‘So, who else
is coming for lunch?’ Brooke asked as we headed past Jenny’s bedroom door. I
hadn’t been able to bring myself to go in there yet. Her parents had been to
collect all of her belongings with Brooke and Molly’s help while I’d been in the
hospital. I didn’t want to see an empty room, it would just be one more
reminder of what I’d lost. ‘I hope it’s not a big crowd as I’m starving and may
just have to fork-stab anyone who tries to take my second helpings.’

‘Just you two
today, I need to talk to you both.’

‘You’re not
pregnant again, are you?’ Brooke gasped, as I undid the baby gate on the stairs
and we stepped through.

‘No,’ I shot
back. ‘You know what the doctor said, no more children. Besides, these three
are handful enough,’ I confirmed when Oliver and Jonas came running, screaming
with excitement to see their favourite aunties.

‘I swear you
get bigger each time I see you, Oliver,’ Molly laughed, sweeping him up and
spinning him around. Brooke grabbed Jonas and hoisted him in the air amidst a
load of squeals and giggles.

‘Mama,’ Eva
called, gripping the edge of the sofa and hauling herself up, not wanting to
miss out on all of the action. I kneeled down and held my arms out.

‘Come on
then, come to me,’ I called. She smiled and started to stomp her way across the
carpet towards me with big smile on her face. ‘Good girl,’ I praised, beyond
proud to see her walking. She giggled and swayed her way over to me, looking so
sweet in a pair of dungarees with a white and pink striped top underneath. I
was amazed when she made it to me without falling over. Even Oliver and Jonas
hadn’t mastered walking as fast as she had. I picked her up and pressed her to
my chest as I kissed her repeatedly, full of pride. ‘You’re so clever, darling.
Mummy loves you so much.’

‘Loves Jonas
too,’ he called. I smiled over at him as Molly held him.

‘I love you
too, Jonas, and Oliver, and Auntie Molly and Auntie Brooke, too. You’re my
favourite people in the whole wide world.’

‘And Daddy,’
Oliver reminded me seriously. I leaned over and kissed his forehead.

‘Right, I
know Auntie Brooke’s hungry, who else is?’ I asked, quickly changing the topic
of conversation.

‘Me,’ came a
chorus from everyone but Eva, who called ‘Dada.’ 

‘So, what did
you need to talk to us about?’ Brooke asked, finally putting down her knife and
fork after two large helpings of stroganoff, with Molly supervising and
restricting her portions of rice.

‘I miss you
both when we’re apart, the children miss you too, and whenever you have free
time, you always come and spend it with us. I don’t want us to live at opposite
ends of the country anymore, I want you to move up to Loch Airdrie with us.’

‘What?!’ Brooke
uttered, her green eyes widening in surprise.

‘Really?’
Molly asked, with a similar look on her face.

‘The way I
see it, you’re not big on the party scene anymore, you don’t really have many
other friends that live in London, what do you have to lose?’

‘Our incomes
for a start, Ellie. Finding a well-paid job up there isn’t going to be easy,’
Brooke replied.

‘I have a
solution for that,’ I nodded. ‘The timing couldn’t be more perfect. Dan’s spa
manageress has accepted a position that came up in his hotel in New York, so
there’s a vacancy, which Molly is already more than qualified for. Given Dan’s
so generous, it would be better paid than you are now and the benefits package
is so good that no one ever wants to leave his employ.’

‘Seriously?’
Molly asked. ‘And Dan’s ok with this?’

‘Dan
suggested it, it was his idea, Molly. He knows how much I miss you both and he
has every faith in your abilities.’

‘So he’d let
me work at the spa as well?’ Brooke asked.

‘He would,
but I don’t want you to,’ I replied, turning to take her hand in mine. ‘I need
help with the children and now that Jenny …’ I shook my head and huffed out a
deep breath of emotion.

‘You’d pay me
to help you look after the children?’ Brooke asked, squeezing my hand tightly.
I nodded, unable to say anything. I turned to get a baby wipe to clean up Eva’s
face while she banged her spoon on the table of her high chair and heard Brooke
and Molly whispering.

‘I know I’m
asking a lot,’ I confirmed when I looked back at them. ‘I’m asking you to
uproot your lives, for Brooke to change careers, and I’ll completely understand
if you don’t want to consider it, but I had to ask. You were our first choices
when we discussed this. We’d either give you a permanent suite at the hotel or
you could have the boathouse. Either way, we’d sort transport to and from the
island by boat for you as part of the deal. Take some time to think about it, I
don’t want you agreeing out of pity. If you want to come, I’ll be over the
moon, but if you don’t, then we just continue to try and see each other
whenever we can, like we have been for the last few years.’

‘We don’t
need to think about it,’ Molly smiled. ‘And we’re not accepting out of pity
either, Ellie. I’m tired of London, of living in a city where everyone’s in a
rush and stressed all of the time. Our happiest times are when we’re with our
best friend and her children up in Scotland, where there’s peace and fresh air
and the pace is so much calmer.’

‘Are you
serious?’ I asked, my spirits lifting for the first time in days.

‘
You’d
better be serious,’ Brooke laughed. ‘Because you know me, I’m like a limpet. Once
I latch on, there’s no shaking me off, you’ll be stuck with us for life.’

‘Just how I
wanted it,’ I nodded, fighting another set of tears. ‘You really have no
reservations? We’d fly you back to London whenever you wanted to come and spend
time with your parents.’

‘The only
reservation I have is how I’m supposed to fill Jenny’s shoes, she was amazing
with them,’ Brooke replied quietly, a sad look settling on her face. I squeezed
her hand this time.

‘You won’t
fill her shoes, because there was only ever one Jenny, but there’s also only
one Brooke, you’ll find your own way. You both love my children as if they’re
your own and that’s all I need. Learning how to handle them daily, that will
come with time. Jenny had no formal experience at that either when she started.
You know how much they adore you, both of you, you’ll be amazing because you
are
amazing, Brooke Hanson.’

‘Don’t make
me cry,’ she moaned. She looked back at Molly, who nodded.

‘We’re in,’
she confirmed, putting the biggest smile on my face. ‘When do you want us to
start?’

‘As soon as
you can.’

‘How about
you give us this week to get sorted. We can quit the hotel tomorrow, we just
won’t get paid for walking out, but we have enough savings to tide us over. We
could come up this weekend. What do you think, Brooke?’

‘I say hell
yes,’ she beamed. ‘Scotland, watch out, the Hansons are about to invade.’

‘Guys,’ I
moaned, a wave of positive emotion flooding my system as I went to hug each of
them. ‘You’ve no idea what this means to me. What can I do to thank you?’

‘Pudding
would be good,’ Brooke suggested.

‘I want
pudding, too,’ called Oliver.

‘Me, too,’
added Jonas. I smiled as I looked at them all sitting around the table. They’d
just made my day.

As Chris
drove the boat across the loch, I felt a sense of calm descending on me,
despite the forceful gusts of wind that had the boat rocking and bouncing
across the waves on the loch. All of the trees were struggling to stay upright
and Eva started crying, alarmed at the rough journey. Even with the knowledge
of a harsh winter fast approaching, leaving London and coming back here was
like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I’d lived in the city for
years, longer than I had here, but this felt like home. This was home. Except
part of it was missing. Dan. I wasn’t sure what I expected when we got on the
plane. Even though I’d suggested us having a break, I never imagined him giving
up without a fight. I thought he’d tear through the airport gates and storm the
plane, but he hadn’t. I hadn’t heard a word from him since he stalked out of
the shower this morning. It hurt more than I’d expected. My moods and feelings
were changing so fast, I was giving myself whiplash, let alone him. I wasn’t
sure I should be making decisions at the moment, I didn’t really know which way
was up right now.

‘Can we go
and see Jenny?’ Oliver asked, tugging my hand as we walked up the jetty and
looked at the boathouse. I felt my eyes burning with tears and fought them for
his sake.

‘I told you
Jenny’s had to go away, darling, she’s not here.’

‘I miss her,’
he sighed, making my heart break.

‘She misses
you too, so much, but Auntie Brooke is going to come and look after you from
next week. How much fun will it be to spend time with her every day, and Auntie
Molly, too?’

‘I get to see
them every day?’ he asked, perking up. I nodded and smiled. He loved his aunts
so much. ‘Yay,’ he cheered, letting go of my hand and jumping up and down as he
clapped.

‘Are you ok
heading up from here?’ asked Chris, flashing me a sympathetic look. I nodded my
response. ‘Ok, I’ll go back and get the rest of the bags for you.’

I averted my
eyes as we passed the boathouse and headed up to the house, fighting every step
of the way against the wind as I carried Eva and held Jonas’s hand. The lights
were already on and I could see a fire burning in the lounge, where Mr. and
Mrs. McAdams were sitting. When I opened the door, they shot to their feet. I
set Eva down and ran to Mrs. McAdams, who opened her arms to embrace me and I
started sobbing on her shoulder. The old couple had become like parents to me,
grandparents to the children. I’d missed them so much.

‘It’s so good
to have you home, back where you belong,’ she whispered, as she rocked me back
and forth. ‘I’m so sorry for what happened, we both are. I don’t know what to
say, she’ll be sorely missed.’

‘She will,’ I
sniffed.

‘Where’s
Daniel?’ she asked, holding me at arm’s length as she studied my face. I shook
my head and started crying again. What had I done? Being back here, in his
house, with all of those memories, I suddenly felt bereft. It was bad enough
that I’d have to get used to being here without Jenny’s laughter, let alone
Dan. I’d wanted space from him, but now that I had it, my need for him to be
close was even more powerful.

‘I need a
moment. Could you look after the children for me? I asked.

‘Of course I
can, take all the time you need,’ she confirmed with a gentle smile. I gave Mr.
McAdams a hug and kiss after he’d put Jonas down.

‘We’re here
for you, Ellie. Whatever you need.’