04 - Shock and Awesome (51 page)

 
   
"She has nothing to gain from telling me. Maddox could've lied in the hope of keeping us together, but Blake? From her perspective, it looks like she loses if she says nothing happened. She doesn't get Maddox and she doesn't keep me away."

 
   
"Or, things with her and Maddox have ended, and she's trying to get on his good side by getting you two back together. She did screw up the case."

 
   
"I didn't think of that, but somehow, I don't think so. I'd never try getting an ex back with his ex. There're some guys I dated that I'd like to dump back on their exes... but this? I don't know. All I can think is Blake had nothing to gain from telling me nothing happened. So, yes. I believe her. I believe nothing happened."

 
   
"So, let's say, we believe her," said Lily, ignoring my epiphany. "What now?"

 
   
"Honestly, I don't know. It would be easier to keep on hating Maddox for cheating, but he always told me he didn't, and it got blown out of proportion. Now I just look like a jerk for not trusting him."

 
   
Lily's slightly greasy palm landed on the back of my hand. "No, you don't. You saw something going on that could have been something going on, but instead, it was something going on that might just have been undercover goings on."

 
   
"I'm going to take a moment to process that." I flopped back on the couch and Lily did the same.

 
   
"When you're done being a human computer, what are you going to do about Maddox now? He's still in love with you, right?"

 
   
"Yeah, but I don't know. I think the bad feelings went on too long and then all that stuff with Solomon..."

 
   
"All the awesome sex?"

 
   
"
Ummm
, yeah, that stuff..." That, and all the feelings, the good and the bad, the jealousy, and the upset, the not knowing whether to believe my own eyes, or what Maddox told me, all that and... Solomon. It was a helluva lot to process. I wriggled uncomfortably on the couch. "Where are the pillows?"

 
   
"In an unnamed box somewhere over there." Lily waved a hand towards the window. "
Jord's
been really great with taking over the packing, but he doesn't label anything. I think he packed my toothbrush."

 
   
"How's he bearing up?"

 
   
"Okay. He's sad. We both are, but we can't change it. This baby wasn't meant to be for us, but that doesn't mean we won't love the memory of what could have been."

 
   
"Will you try again?"

 
   
"I don't know. Maybe." Lily smiled sadly. "In a while. After we settle into the new house and the bar is running okay. Ruby's been great, you know. She's babysitting the bar between her shifts and she got the builders to agree to take fifteen percent off the whole bill if they run over the deadline. I'm glad I hired her. So, baby making is a future thing, for now."

 
   
"I'll be there when you're ready. Well, not for, you know, the conception. I'd rather be out of town for that."

 
   
"I'll give you notice."

 
   
"Please don't."

 
   
"Your parents still have sex, you know."

 
   
I gaped at her. "They do not! You take that back!"

 
   
"I wonder if
Jord
and I will still be doing it at that age?"

 
   
"I'm hoping you'll stop pretty soon." I squeezed her hand. "Could have picked worse guys, I guess."

 
   
"I have, but I returned my membership card for Gross Guys by the Dozen," said Lily, and for the first time in a really long time, she laughed. She gave my hand one last squeeze, got up, and headed into the kitchen. She returned with a bottle of champagne and two straws. "Remember this?" she said and I cringed.

 
   
"No glasses?" I asked as she wrested the cork from the neck, sending it popping to the ceiling. Lily raised an eyebrow. "Silly question," I agreed. "What are we toasting?"

 
   
"The end of an era? Not catching a criminal, but having fun trying? Maddox not being a cheating dick? New homes."

 
   
"I'm still in shock and awe that Rafferty got away."

 
   
"Only because you kind of let him. That's shock and awesome, in one."

 
   
"Don't ever tell anyone," I said and she crossed her heart. "So which do we toast? All of the above?"

 
   
Lily nodded and dropped the straws into the neck, wedging herself next to me before offering me one. "Works for me, but you know who we're missing? Who we haven't talked about yet?"

 
   
"Solomon," we both said at the same time.

 
   
"Yep. How do you feel about him?"

 
   
"I've felt really confused for a long time, and now Blake has given me closure about Maddox and I... I'm okay. I feel sad because I don't know what could have been with him."

 
   
"That's not what I asked,
Lexi
. How do you feel about Solomon?"

 
   
I took a deep breath. "I think I love him."

 
   
Lily nodded. "Thought so," she said, and we both put the straws to our lips and took a long draw of champagne.

 
   
~

 
   
I left Lily's at nine and stumbled up the stairs to my apartment, fondly remembering all the times over the years I'd staggered up there. The end of an era indeed. With Lily moving out in just a couple of weeks, and me a few days after, there would be very little opportunity for partying in the meantime. On the plus side, Lily was already planning the big opening night for her bar, and once I got the keys for the bungalow, I'd barely have to trip in my heels at the front door to land in bed.

 
   
Almost as soon as I put my key in the door, the buzzer rang. I stumbled in, and pressed “Answer” for the entry phone. "Hello?"

 
   
"It's Maddox. I know it's late. Can I come up?"

 
   
I paused. What the hell? "Sure."

 
   
I waited for Maddox at the threshold, smiling when he joined me. Something got damaged between us, something deep within, but something was also repaired through Blake’s startling confession. For the first time in a really long time, I didn't feel unhappy to see him, or angry. Rather, I felt confused, unsure, and a little bit happy too. Maybe we couldn't have a romantic relationship, right now, or at all – truly, I didn't know — but maybe we could be friends instead. It was a warming thought.

 
   
"I wasn't sure if you'd be home," he said.

 
   
"I planned on going to Serena's to return the clothes I borrowed, but there was an accident with a bottle of champagne at Lily's..."

 
   
"Let me guess," Maddox laughed. "You two drank it."

 
   
"Yup."

 
   
"You're not planning on driving at all this evening?"

 
   
"No, officer. I'm taking a short walk to bed without breaking a single law."

 
   
"Glad to hear it." Maddox shuffled from one foot to another.

 
   
"So, what can I do for you?"

 
   
"I came by to see if you needed help with the big move. You need any boxes, or labor? I can take a couple days off if you need my help."

 
   
"That's really nice of you, Adam."

 
   
"So...?"

 
   
"Let me think on it, okay? But I really appreciate it."

 
   
"Okay, well, let me know." Maddox turned to leave.

 
   
"Hey, Blake talked to me today."

 
   
Maddox paused. "She did?"

 
   
"Yeah. She told me nothing happened between you guys."

 
   
"I told you that too, more than once." He held a hand up. "I know. You don't have to say anything. I didn't put her up to it... I want you to know that."

 
   
"I know."

 
   
"So, what now?"

 
   
"Maybe we can be friends?"

 
   
Maddox seemed to think about that, then he nodded, gave me a sad smile, and nodded again. "We always were,
Lexi
. I just don't want to give up on the idea that you've given up on me. Not yet." He stepped backwards and half turned. "Call me soon if you need help with the move. I'm in the queue behind your brothers, cousins, uncles, your sister's scary boyfriend, and your dad." I waited for him to mention Solomon, but he didn't. That spoke volumes. Maddox knew something went on between us, but he didn't know what the situation was now: nothing, just my heart racing fast whenever my boss was round — the way it once did around Maddox — and my admission to Lily.

 
   
"There's always room for another," I told him, "’Night, Adam."

 
   
"’Night,
Lexi
. Sweet dreams." He gave me a wave, and a happier smile, before clattering down the stairs. After hearing the front door shut, I stepped inside and closed mine. I kicked off my shoes, hung my jacket on the rack, strolled into the living room, and screamed.

 
   
"Didn't mean to scare you," said Solomon, rising from my couch.

 
   
"Great job not doing that! What the hell are you doing in my living room?"

 
   
"You mean besides listening to you make friends with the ex?"

 
   
"Besides that."

 
   
Solomon held his hands out, palms up. "Waiting for you."

 
   
Well, duh, I guessed that. There was no other reason to break in. Speaking of which... "You broke in!"