When Fall Fades (The Girl Next Door Series Book 1) (19 page)

Chapter 18

Archer Hayes

A
rcher finally pulled back, but only an inch. Breathless and shocked, he stared into the desire-glazed eyes of the most intoxicating woman he’d ever known—memorizing the tenderness and trust he saw reflecting back from her beautiful face.

Not knowing if he’d ever feel as alive as he did in this moment, he greedily kissed her again, tracing her cheek and jaw with his thumb before locking his fingers behind her neck.

With what could only be described as a purr, she arched back into him. He fought to restrain himself, to regain his trusty control, but her touch electrified him body and soul.

Everything he wanted since he’d first laid eyes on her was wrapped up in his arms and for the life of him, he couldn’t let go. Not yet. It was a reckless move but he was too enrapt to care. His hands tangled in her wild hair. He inhaled a heady breath of tangerines, tasted the sweet fragrance on her lips.
Mmm
, he could kiss her forever. Her soft curves molded against him, her hips tilting in, her hot little hands anchoring at his waist, driving him out of his ever-lovin’ mind.

If he didn’t slow things down, he’d snap. All his careful composure would be shot, and Sadie deserved better. He slowed his kiss, prolonging the sweetness until he felt calm enough to stop. He pressed his forehead to hers but kept his eyes closed—knowing if he looked at her he’d kiss her again, possibly even throw her over his shoulder and tackle her door down.

After a long moment she peeled her luscious body away. It took every ounce of what remained of his restraint not to pull her back when he opened his eyes and searched her face.

Those parted lips freshly stung and swollen. The spark in her eyes telling him she’d not only enjoyed his kiss, but was tempted to reindulge as much as he. She was an addict’s paradise, and he knew he’d either fall off the wagon or require an intervention immediately.

When he finally found his voice all that came out was a super charming and intelligent, “Wow … I, uh …
wow
!” Taking a small step back, he tried to regroup. Not knowing what to do with his tragically empty hands, he shoved one through his disheveled hair.

The space gave him perspective. This was a disaster. What were you thinking? The temptation to bolt grew by the second. He needed an escape plan. But he was too scattered, his senses still reeling from the effects of the mind-blowing kiss. It was abundantly clear he wasn’t thinking with the appropriate brain.

He
had
to get out of here. Now. Lord only knew what would happen if he stayed. He’d probably lasso the moon and sing “Buffalo Gals” for just one more helping.

Folding in his bottom lip, he tasted Sadie’s kiss all over again. Hunger roared to life in his chest, tempting him to defy his own rules and forget everything he’d worked for.

Sadie seemed to pick up on his escalating panic. She took two steps to the edge of her stoop and sat. Looking up at him, she patted the spot next to her.

Archer gave a resigned smile and lowered himself beside her—thankful she’d saved him from acting like a psychotic jerk and fleeing the scene of the crime.

And it was a crime. Stolen moments that had no business in his possession.

They sat in silence, gazing out at the last peels of light peeking through the trees, physically stilled by what had just happened, and emotionally frenzied for an explanation.

Elation and regret warred within him. In one respect, he was relieved simply because that kiss couldn’t lie. But now what? Ignore this … this thing between them? Tie up this case and never look back? Right, sure.
Easy
.

Explore it some more? His body tightened just thinking about it. His discipline dissolving under the heated thoughts.

Before he could torture himself further, Sadie broke her silence. “Okay. I guess I can go first. You make me nervous.” He watched her, though she didn’t look at him. “And not in a bad way. I, uh, really don’t want to want you. I’ve been fighting it and losing. And now … well, I have no idea what to do about you.” She laced her fingers together, eyeing them as if they held all the answers. “There. That wasn’t so bad. Now you go.” Keeping her head down, she peered at him from the corner of her eye.

Archer smiled, couldn’t help the rumble of laughter that spilled out. “
You
, Sadie Carson, drive me crazy … in the best possible way, which isn’t good for me either. In fact, it’s incredibly inconvenient. And for the first time I can’t control it or will it away. That’s new territory for me.” Several beats of silence passed. He knew he hadn’t given her much to work with, but he also honestly didn’t have the slightest idea what to say. “So, what do we do?”

Sadie bent one leg in, angling toward him. In the span of a breath, he was sinking down into her oceany eyes, not even caring how deep he fell. Surely, God had never created a more beautiful woman. Archer made a conscious effort to keep that thought to himself, and counted it a small victory that he was able to control
something
.

His throat ran dry. His mind blank. He was good at reading people, his job hinged on it. But right now the emotion on Sadie’s face was beyond his comprehension—some kind of resolute confidence. It stirred up something lost in him, made him crave something he couldn’t name.

“Do you pray, Archer?”

Well, that explains it.

He felt a sharp jab of sadness when he admitted, “Not in a long time.”

The information was processed slowly, without a hint of judgment. “Would you mind if I did? It’s what I always do when I’m at a crossroads.”

He couldn’t look away, and he definitely couldn’t speak, so he nodded. Sadie extended her tiny hand in the space between them and he threaded his fingers through hers, the simple touch more stimulating than seemed reasonable for hand holding. She bowed her head and closed her eyes. Breaking protocol, Archer just kept staring.

Her voice was soft and smooth, like a healing balm. And then she prayed, so simply, like she was talking to someone in their midst.

Something shifted, and suddenly his heart was beating too fast. Too heavy. A blip of life blinking into the bludgeoned mass that had become a numb and faithless void. God, she was magnificent. Completely untouched by cynicism. Completely and entirely guileless and genuine. It should have been awkward, maybe even sanctimonious. But it wasn’t. It was real. The most honest moment of his life. Right here on a small sun-warmed cement stoop, the light slowly fading to gray, this stunningly beautiful woman with an unguarded heart and enough faith to move a mountain.

His thumb absently stroked her hand, her soft skin like cashmere beneath his fingers. And then she looked at their twined hands. A study in contrasts. His big, callused, and dark against her delicate, creamy satin. He didn’t know whether to let go or hold on for dear life, but this time he knew what he wanted to say.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

When she looked up, face shining with hope so brilliant, he knew he had no choice but to kiss her again if only to capture a single ray of that light for himself. Just before he leaned in, her phone rang, cutting the tension and salvaging his last thread of restraint. She dug her free hand into her purse on the step beside her, glanced at the screen and silenced the call.

“You can get that if you want.”
Please get it. Be stronger than me. Let go of my hand and walk away for your own good.

She shook her head. “No way, it’s my mom. I need to freeze her out for a couple days to punish her for her meddling with my love life. Otherwise she’ll never learn.”

Archer laughed. “Oh yeah, how was that hot date? Match made in heaven?” After his teasing words were out he wished them back—having no desire to hear about any part of her “love life” that didn’t involve him.

She rolled her vibrant eyes at him. “It was fine actually, but perhaps we should get back to you.”

“Me?” He pointed to himself, feigning innocence.

“Yes, I’m assuming you had some
other
reason for coming by.” Arching her brow, she shot him a saucy look.

“Nope.” He grinned and drew her hand into his lap, toying with her fingers. “I got
exactly
what I came for.”

Sadie blurted out a laugh. She tugged her hand free and pushed his chest. “Oh, is that right.”

To which he smirked and wagged his eyebrows.

Her smile turned ultraviolet, and she shook her head. “You’ve got it all figured out, huh, Agent Hayes?”

“Not even close.” Reaching over, he rubbed a wavy lock between his fingers, the softness of her cheek against the back of his knuckles welcomed the memory of their kiss. He hesitated, knowing he was begging for trouble, and then caved. “Have dinner with me tomorrow night.”

“Can’t.” She shrugged. “Girls’ night.”

“Lunch then.” He went for broke and held his breath.

She took her time, torturing him. A slow, sexy grin tilting the sweetest lips he’d ever tasted. “Yeah, okay.”

Archer exhaled with exaggeration. Then he winced. “I did actually have something I wanted to tell you.”

“You don’t say?”

“Yeah, yeah. I heard you have a meeting with the Westwicks and Charlie’s lawyer tomorrow, and I wanted to warn you. We’re investigating John Westwick specifically. Now I haven’t been privy to the terms of the will, I’m supposed to get access to them tomorrow after the information has been released to the family, but my instincts are firing, and I want you to be careful.”

“So this is like a professional courtesy?”

“Purely professional.” He nodded and gave in to her infectious grin.

“Interesting.” She tapped her lips with her index finger. “I wonder why you took the trouble of coming all the way over. You could’ve just called?”

“I would have, Sherlock, but I forgot my phone at the office.”

“Likely story.” Easing off the step, she brushed off her palms and offered him help up.

“So, lunch tomorrow.” A date. He was in it now.

“Yeah, after my meeting with the lawyers I’m all yours.” 

“Mmm. I like the sound of that. Know just the place too.” He cleared his throat. “And, uh, since I’m so professional and courteous, I probably owe you the courtesy of a good-night kiss.”

She smiled, equal parts mischief and delight. Her arms slipped around his neck, and she whispered against his lips. “I’ll be sure to forward my gratitude to Uncle Sam.”

God Bless America.

Chapter 19

Sadie Carson

S
adie tossed and turned into the early morning, reliving every insatiable moment of their front porch tryst and that kiss.
Kisses.
About a hundred of them. Sweet, hot, dizzying kisses.

Oh, swoon.

She humored the giddy smile hiding behind her lips and buried her face in her pillow. Rolling over again she breathed out a dreamy sigh, caught herself and frowned. “Oh, for crying out loud.” She was becoming one of those women she hated.

When her alarm finally sounded she felt like she had just drifted off. Debating whether or not to run, she tore off the sheets, desperately needing an outlet for her, eh,
frustration
.

Yes, they were going on a date, but she was still banking on the hope that the initial spark would fizzle and she could get on with her boring, safe life—waiting for closure … or a miracle. 

After an invigorating and mildly preoccupied run, she showered, then loaded up on some fresh-brewed caffeine and dry Reese’s Puffs cereal straight from the box. With excitement for the day bubbling below the surface, she practically waltzed into her room, turned on the radio—belting out a classic REO Speedwagon rock ballad about the mushiest kind of love—and started riffling through her closet.

Since she was heading to a law office first, she settled on a black pencil skirt, a cap-sleeved teal wrap around blouse and her peep-toed retro pumps with a bow detail at the heel. Taking extra care to polish her appearance, she slaved under the blow-dryer to straighten her hair and added a little something extra with her make-up.

When she surveyed the finished product, she barely recognized the sophisticated woman peering back from the mirror.
Are we playing dress up, Sadie?
Her mother would be so proud.

She sighed, losing a bit of her starch. Truth be told it had been years since she’d recognized herself. She should ditch all the extra glam. She might not know who she was exactly, but this wasn’t it. But when she checked the clock, she knew she didn’t have time to start over. She’d have to go with it.

Rebelling with a pair of oversized black hoop earrings, she forced down an anxious flutter, searching herself for something familiar to latch onto. It was just a reading of a will and a lunch date. So, why did it feel like her whole world was about to change?

Sadie managed to make it with a few minutes to spare but was still the last to arrive.

Strained silence played like ominous violins, plucking at her tensely corded nerves as she sat with John, Sarah, and Evan Westwick, waiting for the lawyer to enter the boardroom and begin the meeting. Each of their reflections off the glossy surface of the table seemed to be watching her, and the longer she sat the more scrutinized she felt by the members of the Westwick clan.

Curling her nails into her palms, she fought to occupy her hands from the strong urge to munch at her cuticles. She readjusted in her seat for about the fiftieth time, grateful the table shielded the nervous jitter of her foot from sight.

John Westwick’s gaze sharpened on her and his reflection followed suit—all four of his eyes evaluating her mounting paranoia.

What were they thinking? Did they think she took advantage of Charlie and sweet-talked her way into his will?

She felt like leaving, refusing anything he’d given her to make a point that she hadn’t been gold digging an old man. But then she thought of some of the mysterious ways of Charlie and the strange things he had said over the years. Ultimately, her curiosity won out.

On top of all the awkwardness tainting the stuffy air, Archer’s warning chipped away at her splintering sanity so much that when Evan’s phone rang her leg jerked hard enough to add another inch to the slit in her slim pencil skirt.

The humiliating sound of the splitting seam hung in the silence.
Oh, lovely
. Heat infused her cheeks.

She needed to get a grip
.
They were in a boardroom, in a well populated building. She was perfectly safe—even if she was in the room with a killer.

Moments later, Charlie’s lawyer entered the room. “Hi folks. Eugene Goldberg. Before we begin, Charlie had written a letter for each of you that I have been instructed to give to you first.” The stocky man with a Brillo pad of silver-threaded hair sloppily licked his fingers, separating the envelopes.

Sadie grabbed hers from the table, stomach churning. Taking a deep breath, she unfolded the letter and began reading Charlie’s parting words.

My dear Sadie,

If you are reading this letter you know that I’m gone from this world and in a far better place. I know that life throws us curveballs from time to time and that you’ve suffered your share, but God’s not done with you yet. You’re too smart and strong to give up. Too remarkable. I’ve had my share of regrets too, Sadie, but I never let them own me. You are missing everything beautiful this life has to offer because you’re still hanging on to your hurt. Set it free.

Remember when I gave you that old rock paperweight from my desk and told you you’d need it when you eventually go back to school to become a doctor? I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was wrong. Wrong to insinuate that what you do now isn’t good enough, that you were a failure for abandoning your dream. What you do is so important and so essentially you. It perfectly defines who you are. Dreams change. It’s okay to leave some things behind, Sadie, I promise you. I also said to you that day that the rock was a symbol … beauty for ashes. REMEMBER what I told you. I am so proud of you, Sadie-girl. I just know that there is more for you. Don’t miss a minute of it.

Thank you for befriending an old coot like me. I was better for knowing you, my dear, and I loved you like my own.

Charlie

Tasting her salty tears, she swiped at her cheeks, hugging Charlie’s last words against her chest. When she looked up, all eyes were on her. Apparently they were not as moved by their letters as she was by hers. She grabbed the tissue the lawyer offered and dabbed her eyes.

“All right, now on to the last will and testament of Charles Arthur Westwick. To my son, Jonathan Ray Westwick II, and my grandson, Evan Charles Westwick, I hereby bequeath half of my estate to be divided, equally.” He looked up from his readers and hesitated. “The amount totaling $8.4 million.”

Sadie’s jaw fell open. She had no idea Charlie had been that wealthy. And that was only
half
of his estate! She glanced at John and Evan who seemed slightly perturbed to each only be receiving a fourth. They eyed each other silently and then shot daggers in Sadie’s direction.

Their $4.2 mill a piece was nothing to sneeze at, for Pete’s sake! Greed was an ugly color on these already wealthy men.

Eugene cleared his throat and began again. “To Sadie Elizabeth Carson, I hereby bequeath my Steinway & Sons baby grand piano, the entirety of my record collection, and the sum of $78,422 to be designated to pay off the remainder of student-loan debt.”

Wow.
She felt the warmth of her smile pour through her and squeeze her heart. It was so generous and thoughtful. So Charlie.

“What about the rest of his estate?” His son John asked, clearly miffed.

Eugene held up his hand and found his place in the will. “The remainder of the estate, totaling over $8,320,000, will be used to set up a charitable foundation—headed by Miss Carson—to provide financial assistance in the areas of healthcare, medical equipment, counseling, and transportation services to disabled senior citizens within the St. Louis area.”

“What?” Sadie and Evan blurted in unison.

“Miss Carson, Charles provided all the information needed to help you get started. We will be representing you and protecting the interests of Mr. Westwick’s intention for this organization. He has designated salary allowances, staff recommendations, and a list of vendors for your approval. It’s all in this proposal here.” He slid a thick folder across the table.

With trembling fingers she accepted the folder, laid her hands on the dream that Charlie had just dropped in her lap, scarcely fitting a breath through her galloping pulse.

“I, uh … Wow … I don’t know what to say.”
Breathe. Just breathe.

Eugene smiled. “Charlie was very excited about this project and had the most exemplary things to say about you as well. This was his dream for you. A tribute, he said, to all you did for him.”

Sadie was sniffing back happy tears when the rest of the family stood abruptly and excused themselves. “This is unbelievable,” she whispered under her breath.

“Miss Carson, you do have a right to refuse, if this is not what you want. It was never Charlie’s intention to burden you.”

“No, this is a huge blessing for me and a lot of people. I can’t wait.” A new dream. An ecstatic grin took possession of her face as she stood and gathered the documents.

“It was a pleasure to meet you. We’ll be in touch.”

“Thank you.” Disbelief soaked into every pore. Dumbfounded shock had her ambling out to her car with all the speed of a prize-winning tortoise. Cranking down the windows, she sat in the parking lot. The summer breeze chased through the Camaro—the season clinging to the wind well past its time.

She closed her eyes, leaning her head back against the black vinyl, and thanked God and Charlie for the opportunity to really help people. To make the difference she never could have on her own. It was everything she wanted for her life.

Well, almost everything.

Shaking away the one thing that could steal her joy, she glanced at the clock, realizing it was almost time for her lunch date. She wouldn’t let herself feel guilty.

Not today.

She pulled out of the parking garage and headed to meet Archer.

Could this day get any better?

“Thanks for meeting up with me a little early, Joss. I had … some time free up today and I couldn’t wait to tell someone.”

“Okay, you’ve kept me in suspense long enough. What’s the big news? You better not be moving. Oooo, or are you in love? Pregnant?”

“Would you like to keep guessing absurdly random things or can I just tell you?”

Joselyn giggled. “I’m all ears.”

So Sadie proceeded to tell her best friend about the meeting.

“Sweet. Moses.” She stared at Sadie unmoving, her exotic eyes bulging.

“You and your Charlton Heston crush.” Laughing, she nudged Joselyn. “Pretty amazing, right?”

“Uhh, yeah! Wow! Sadie, we have to celebrate.” She motioned to the waiter and ordered two flutes of champagne.

“To new beginnings and fairy godfathers.”

Sadie clinked her glass and smiled, raising her flute to Charlie. “New beginnings.”

Joselyn sipped daintily, making an “ahh” sound post-gulp. “Sooo, what about that hot FBI guy? Anything to report?”

“What, my new multimillion dollar NPO and a baby grand aren’t enough for ya?”

“Priorities, my dear, priorities.”

“Well, we uh … sort of made out on my porch last night. Okay, made out might not be the best summation. More like he nearly ravished me in broad daylight.” She chased the admission with a fizzy gulp of champagne that burned in her nose.

“Don’t you tease me, Sadie Carson.”

Sadie sniffed, contemplated denying it, and instead lit into a mischievous smile of her own.

“Get out!” Joss squeaked. “Spill it.”

As she described the moment that had been reeling in her mind, she felt herself tingling with the renewed pleasure the memory evoked. Tingling that had nothing to do with the champagne and everything to do with the memory of his possessive touch, his tender gaze, his all-consuming kiss. His … everything. “Joss, it sounds ridiculous but I’m totally wrecked. From a kiss. I think he ruined me. I don’t even feel like the same person.”

Losing herself for one more deluded second was all she allowed. Confusion, embarrassment, maybe even heartbreak filled the hole previously occupied by the delicious memory. 

She took her own advice and ripped off the Band-Aid, shuffling out the words as fast as they’d come. “And then we prayed, he asked me out, and stood me up. Can we get dessert? I think I require obscene amounts of chocolate.” Her stomach cramped when she thought about the hour-plus she’d waited for Archer to show. How foolish she felt, not just for sitting alone and fending off the server, but for opening her heart again. Lesson learned.