Authors: Jade Lee
Helaine’s mouth dropped open in shock. Beside him, Gwen gasped in horror. Even the ladies behind him tsked like clucking hens. He looked desperately at Helaine. Did she want him to say the hat was lovely?
“Er, perhaps it’s growing on me.”
If his love looked horrified before, now she was practically apoplectic.
“No, no! Not growing on me. I mean…well, I…I don’t like hats! Not at all!”
Helaine stared at him as if he had lost his mind. As did, coincidentally, everyone else in the room. He didn’t dare look behind him to see what the maids thought.
“That is, er…”
Thankfully, Helaine was able to help. “I believe his lordship is saying that as a rule, gentlemen don’t like hats on ladies. They’re usually taller, you know. And so spend a great deal of time avoiding the feathers and such.”
“Yes,” he said much too enthusiastically. “That’s it exactly.”
Then, lest he feel he had successfully navigated the treacherous waters of female fashion, Gwen was there to puncture his ego. “Oh, leave off, Robert. You have said quite enough, thank you.”
Robert turned at his sister’s sharp tone. It wasn’t unusual for her to poke fun at him, but there was an extra bite to her words. “Gwen,” he began, but she waved him away.
“Go, go. You have no business being here anyway.”
“I…,” he began. He could hardly say that he wanted
to talk to Helaine. That he wanted to see her again, then whisk her away to another glorious night of exploration. In the end, he executed a stiff bow. “Ladies, I can see that I am de trop.”
Meanwhile, the baroness turned back to him, her eyes as tragic as her tone. “Do you truly not like
any
hat, my lord?”
He glanced back to Helaine for guidance, but she was occupied with avoiding the flop of what he believed were ostrich feathers and so could not guide him. In the end, he opted for simple honesty.
“Baroness, your skin is clear, your eyes quite pretty. And even your mouth, if I may be so bold, is very expressive. Without you even saying a word, I can tell when you are happy or sad or disapproving or delighted. Why ever would I want to look at ostrich feathers or lace or bows when I could see your face?”
The baroness gaped at him. Helaine, too, straightened up with a look of shocked gratitude on her face. And even Gwen released a gasp of surprise. He didn’t know if he had stuck his foot in it again or not, but he had done his best. So with another bow he took his leave, only to be called back a moment later by Helaine.
“My lord!”
He stopped and leaned back in the room. Nothing on earth would induce him to walk farther inside. “Mrs. Mortimer?”
“I’m afraid I was occupied last night and so missed our discussion. Would you perhaps be available tonight? I am, of course, at your service whatever time you need.”
He almost grinned. Was there ever a more perfect woman? “Oh, yes. Directly after dinner would be ideal. Thank you for reminding me, Mrs. Mortimer.”
Then he bowed again before escaping with all the other men in the household. Indeed, he found them all downstairs with Dribbs, discussing the latest horse races. Thank heaven at last for rational conversation!
Helaine was dropping with fatigue. After countless
hours of discussion and sketches and ridiculous changes, all the women had gone back to the original gown designs with the exception of a half dozen tiny bows. The dowager baroness did love bows, so Helaine had added the decoration to her gown for the wedding. And Penny had to add bows to all of the women’s shoes.
But now it was done, the fabrics were put away, and unlike Wendy who now had to sew all those dresses, Helaine’s work was finished. She could have her discussion with Robert, and was already thinking about other things they might do, when she was stopped cold in the hallway.
She was leaving the upper parlor, passing by what she was sure was Gwen’s room. The sound was muffled because the door was shut, but some noises were hard to miss. The sound of a girl sobbing was quite distinct and all the more alarming because it was probably Gwen in there. Gwen of the sunny disposition. Gwen who was filled with love for her fiancé and excitement about their coming wedding. Gwen who was now sobbing as if her heart would break.
Helaine hesitated, unsure whether or not to intrude. But who else could the girl talk to? Not her mother, who was right now back in her bedroom and, by all accounts, had stopped bathing again. Not any of the future in-laws, who were well-meaning but as dense as rocks. Which left no other female but her or perhaps a maid. So Helaine took a chance and knocked on the door.
The gasping sobs stopped immediately. Then there was a long pause. And just as Helaine was tapping again, she heard Gwen speak.
“I’m fine, Robert, really. Just let me rest.”
Well, if that wasn’t a lie, then Helaine was deaf, blind, and dumb. The girl’s voice was stiff with false cheer and had none of the life Helaine was accustomed to hearing from her. So, taking the risk, Helaine turned the knob and was pleased to find that it wasn’t locked.
“Forgive me,” she said as she entered the room. “But as your dressmaker, it’s part of my job to make sure you’re looking your best in my gowns. And right now, it sounds like you’re not quite feeling the thing.”
Gwen regarded her from the bed. The room was dark, but enough light spilled in from the hallway to illuminate her swollen nose and red eyes. And her hair was all askew, as if she had tried to pull out the pins and ended up grabbing the hair instead.
“Helen! Oh, shut the door! Quickly, before Robert sees.”
Now, that wasn’t at all what Helaine expected, but she did as she was told, stepping inside the room and quietly shutting the door behind her. Meanwhile, Gwen lit a lamp, and soon the room was bathed in a warm glow. Sadly, the golden color did very little to aid Gwen’s looks. If anything, she appeared all the more miserable.
Helaine crossed to her side. “Oh, sweetheart, what has happened? Has Robert been pompous or dictatorial again?” It was a joke of sorts. Nothing could bring out a smile in Gwen faster than poking fun at her brother’s high-handed ways.
It worked. Gwen released a snort that was almost a laugh.
“Better to ask when he hasn’t been an ass.” Then her smile faded. “But that’s not it.” She waved at the closed door. “It’s a game of sorts that he and I have played since we were children. Whenever something terrible has happened, I shut the door and sob so that he can stand at the doorway and listen in misery. Then he has the maids bring me treats and the like until I come out. I did much the same thing for him, too, until he became old enough to disappear for days on end. Jack was the only one who could comfort me, but that was only because he was so young. He would come into my bedroom and just curl up beside me. Something about having a little brother sleeping beside me always eased the pain. But then he went away to school, and I’ve barely ever seen him since.”
Helaine nodded slowly, knowing a little something about needing to cry one’s eyes out. “But Robert would do anything for you. Surely you know that.”
“Of course I do. But so many things cannot be changed. We could do nothing when Mother had one of her spells or Father was dunned for debt.”
Helaine didn’t answer. She’d never had a brother or sister to share such burdens with. But if she had, she couldn’t imagine shutting them out. Gwen must have read her expression, because she simply shrugged.
“I know it’s silly. Truly, I do. But it’s the way it’s always been. Besides, why make him see my tears when there’s nothing he can do about them?”
“I suppose that makes sense,” she said, though she wasn’t sure it really did. “But what has happened to cause all this?”
That was obviously something Gwen wasn’t as eager to share. Her gaze dropped away, and her hands began twisting in the pillowcase. Then she began biting her lower lip, but she didn’t speak. In the end, Helaine did the only thing she could think of. She put her arm around the girl and hugged her tight. Gwen didn’t resist. In a minute, she had wrapped her other arm tight around Helaine and the tears were flowing along with a few words, not that they made much sense.
“I c-can’t do it! I j-just can’t!”
“Can’t do what, sweetheart?”
“I can’t get married!”
The words came out as a loud wail that was followed by heart-wrenching sobs. If Gwen had been anyone else, Helaine would have taken it as simple prewedding jitters. But the girl was one of the most levelheaded she’d ever met. Hadn’t she had the sole care of her mother and younger brother all these years? To see her so completely undone was alarming. Whatever had happened, it was obviously tearing her apart.
But there was nothing Helaine could do but hold the girl for a while, waiting until the worst of the storm passed. And then, when Gwen was finally gaining control of herself again, Helaine began to ask for details.
“Was it Edward? Did he do something terrible?”
Gwen vehemently shook her head. “No, no! He has been perfect! But he warned me before. He told me he needed a strong wife, and I tried. I really tried, but I just can’t do it!”
“What are you talking about? You are one of the strongest women I have ever met!”
Gwen straightened up and shook her head. “That’s because you have only seen me lately, when I have been trying. But it has been so hard! I can’t do it much longer!”
Gwen’s voice was getting higher, the panic about to break through again, so Helaine gripped the woman’s hands and turned to face her square on.
“Start at the beginning. Tell me what has been so hard.”
“Being nice to his mother!” Gwen wailed. “And his aunt is so much worse!”
Ah. Now, that made sense. “Yes, today’s dress changes were tiring, but you can hardly—”
“That’s only a part of it!” Gwen cried. “They want a say in everything. They aren’t even living here and yet they have tried to tell Dribbs what wine to serve and what meals should be cooked.”
Helaine couldn’t resist a smile at the idea of that. “I’m sure Dribbs handled it just fine.”
“Of course he did, but that’s because he’s Dribbs. They
also have opinions about flowers and wood paneling and reading material. And children. Oh, my God, you cannot know what they think about how to raise children! Especially since his aunt used to be a schoolteacher.”
Yes, Helaine could well imagine that they had quite the opinions about that. “But what is that—”
“And do you know, they said my breasts were too small and that I should plump them because Edward likes big breasts.”
“Well, that’s certainly impertinent—”
“And the very next day they said my breasts were too large! That he preferred smaller ones and I should stop eating turnips!”
Helaine frowned. “Turnips?”
“One said it fills the chest, the other claimed it simply broadened the hips, and then they started to quarrel about the merits of turnips in stews. It was all I could do to keep myself from throwing every turnip in the cellar right at their heads!”
Helaine couldn’t keep herself from laughing. “Is that why Dribbs was muttering about turnips? I heard him distinctly this afternoon saying he was going to be sure to serve them for dinner.”
Gwen’s eyes widened with shock. “Truly? Do you think they will eat a meal at their house then?”
“I’m sure that was Dribbs’s hope.”
“Mine, too!” she whispered. Then she dropped her head into her hands and moaned. “So you see why I can’t get married. I just can’t!”
Helaine leaned forward, gently pulling Gwen’s hands away from her face. “No, sweetheart, I really don’t understand. What has any of this to do with your marriage?”
It took a moment for Gwen to respond. Her body was so defeated that it seemed to take true effort for her to get the words out.
“They told me yesterday, but I didn’t believe it until Edward said it was true.”
“What was true?”
“I knew we might have care of his sister. Connie is very
sweet, you know, when she’s away from them. And she’ll be coming out soon. Maybe get married.”
Helaine nodded. She had seen flashes of real understanding from Edward’s sister. But the girl was often drowned out by her mother and aunt. “I do like Connie,” she said. “But I don’t understand what—”
“They’re going to live with us! Not just his mother but his aunt, too! Both of them!
Forever!
”
“Oh!” gasped Helaine, at last understanding the problem. “Oh, my.”
“I can’t do it! I just can’t. I can’t stand having them next door—how will I manage with them in my own home? I won’t be able to escape them ever. And I won’t even have Dribbs to serve turnips!”
Gwen flung herself into her pillow again, releasing a full-fledged scream into the depths of the feather stuffing. Helaine rested her hand on the girl’s back, her sympathies fully engaged. Gwen was indeed facing a rather difficult married life if a solution couldn’t be found. But surely there was a logical answer to this dilemma. Even knowing that Gwen had probably already thought of everything, Helaine started at the beginning.
“Have you told Edward that you would prefer a separate household?”
Gwen rolled over in her bed. “Yes, it was the first thing I said, most delicately of course.”