Wanted: Devil Dogs MC (17 page)

Isabel waits, letting Jamie absorb what she’s just told her. It’s a bombshell, but she’s confident her friend will rally in a few moments to ask the hundreds of questions she probably has spinning around her head. As they sit drinking coffee in the sunshine at the new hip deli that has just opened down the street from the boarding house, Isabel can’t help but scan the crowd.

The old neighborhood is buzzing with all the young professionals, the hipsters who have moved in and are slowly turning the area into one of those places people actually want to move to. But her eyes skip over all of them. There’s only one person she’s looking for, only one person she wants to see and he’s not here.

“So, he’s a biker, like
Sons of Anarchy
, super hot guys on motorbikes?” Jamie has always had a way of reducing things to the lowest common denominator.

Isabel rolls her eyes at her friend and shakes her head. “Well, the super hot guy part is right. But the key point you’re missing here is that Wesley’s a criminal.” It had taken a while for her to get her own brain around that important fact. It still isn’t an easy thing to accept.

“Right.” Jamie nods, tapping her perfectly manicured nails against her lips in her ‘thinking’ pose.

Isabel looks down at her own hands, with their nails bitten down to the quick, and she can’t help but feel a little like the least feminine person in the world next to her best friend who is as vibrant and colorful as a peacock.

“But, everything has shades of grey, Issy. It’s not all just black and white.” Jamie looks at her pointedly, knowing that monochrome is exactly how Isabel tends to see the world. Her scientific mind won’t let it be any other way. “There are the mugging-old-lady type of criminals and then there are the stealing-a-loaf-of-bread-to-feed-their-family type and a whole lot in between.”

Isabel smiles at the way Jamie has of seeing the romance in everything. She’s missed having her best friend around. “I’m pretty sure he’s never mugged anyone’s grandma.” She shakes her head. “From the little he told me, he only deals with bad guys of one type or another – rival gangs, people mixed up in drug deals, that kind of thing.”

“So he only did bad stuff to people who deserved it!” Jamie lifts her spoon as if in victory. “That is definitely something I can get on board with.”

Isabel shakes her head at her friend who seems far too pleased with her conclusion. “It still doesn’t make it legal or right, Jamie. Besides, I’m pretty sure the people he works for are bad guys, too, so I don’t know where that leaves him. I shouldn’t have been okay with housing a criminal. I know that. Hell, I’m so by the book it’s not even funny.” Jamie nods in agreement. “I should have turned him in or at least thrown him out of the boarding house when I found out what he did. But I didn’t. I didn’t even come close.” She sighs deeply. “Anyway, it’s not like it matters anymore.”

Jamie sets her cappuccino back down. “And why doesn’t it matter? You’re clearly crazy about this guy, even if you refuse to admit it.”

Isabel rubs her eyes, feeling the familiar tiredness seep through her, despite the copious amounts of caffeine she’s been taking on board as if it is going out of fashion. Since Wesley walked out, her insomnia has worsened. She’s under no illusions that she must look like a wreck. Only sleeping a couple of hours a night will do that to you, apparently. It is time to tell Jamie the full story.

Isabel keeps her voice low, conscious that she doesn’t want the nearby tables to overhear their conversation. She tells Jamie about patching Wesley up every night when he came back from wreaking whatever havoc he was employed to do. She tells her about Jimmy, the member of the Devil Dogs who had threatened her with a knife. Finally she gets to the part of the story that gets her all choked up, but she gets through it as best she can, refusing to cry in public. That was one rule that she had no plans to break anytime soon.

“He left. That was three days ago.” She’s proud of herself for getting through the telling without shedding any tears.

“So that’s why you’ve been dodging my calls.” Jamie’s tone suggests that it all makes sense now.

Isabel nods. “I knew I’d end up telling you if we spoke and I didn’t want to worry you. Besides, I wasn’t quite ready to talk about it.” Her voice cracks and she takes another sip of her coffee as if the bitter taste will do something to soothe the ache in her heart.

Jamie’s hand covers hers and she squeezes it, offering comfort. “You don’t seem all that ready to talk about it now, either.” She looks her friend in the eye. “You look like shit, Issy.”

Isabel can’t help but laugh at Jamie’s directness. The normalcy of her friend’s reaction to Isabel’s obvious distraught state is the best medicine for the craziness that seems to have invaded her life since Wesley walked into it. “Well, I’ve been reliably informed that not sleeping will do that to you.” Isabel huffs a mirthless laugh, stirring her flat white to avoid Jamie’s assessing gaze.

“Yeah, that won’t help any. But it’s not just lack of sleep I’m seeing.” Jamie pauses, tilting her head as if she can get a better read on her friend’s emotions that way. “You know, I’ve never seen you like this.” Jamie’s expression is full of wonder, as if she never expected the day to come.

“Like what?” Isabel looks down at her checked shirt and cut-off shorts. “You’ve never been overly impressed with my wardrobe decisions.” Isabel smiles, remembering the shopping trip Jamie took her on just before they went their separate ways – Isabel to college and Jamie to New York to start her career in fashion. Jamie had pretty much vetoed all of Isabel’s clothes, consigning them to goodwill and she had started from scratch. Unfortunately, Jamie’s sense of style had never really rubbed off on Isabel, and it hadn’t taken long for her to revert back to her old style.

Jamie gives her outfit a once over with a flick of her eyes. “You’re lucky, Issy. You’ve got great hair, amazing eyes, fab skin, and a body to die for. You could be wearing a trash bag and you’d still stop traffic.” Jamie sighs deeply, as if the world isn’t fair. “Your outfit could use some work. I’m not going to lie. But at least you’re rocking the ‘lumberjack chic’ look, but only just.” Jamie holds up a warning finger to her friend as if to say she should tread carefully in her sartorial choices from now on.

“What would I do without you?” Isabel rolls her eyes and laughs at the sobriety on her best friend’s face. When it comes to fashion, there is nothing more serious in Jamie’s opinion.

“Lord only knows.” Jamie shakes her head as if it doesn’t even bear thinking about. “But your wardrobe issues aren’t what I am talking about and you know it.” She gives Isabel a pointed look. “I was talking about the fact that you look like someone’s just killed your dog.”

“I don’t have a dog.” Isabel’s morose response just underscores Jamie’s point.

“Did you tell him how you feel?” Jamie ignores her friend’s pathetic attempt at comedy.

“What do you mean?” Isabel tries to evade the question, although she knows Jamie won’t let her get away with it.

“Don’t play dumb with me, Issy. It doesn’t suit you.” Jamie levels her friend with her laser-focused baby blues.

Isabel squirms under the observation. “No,” she sighs eventually. “No, I didn’t tell him.”

“What didn’t you tell him, Issy? If you can’t say the words out loud to me, how are you ever going to say them to anyone else?” Jamie throws her hands up in despair at her friend’s lack of emotional intelligence.

“I didn’t tell him I love him, okay? And now he’s gone and I don’t know if I’m ever going to see him again!” Isabel’s voice is loud, loud enough to draw attention from a nearby table and she cringes in embarrassment.

Jamie breathes a sigh of relief and mimes wiping sweat from her brow. “Well, I’m glad you didn’t choke on the words! I was beginning to wonder if you were even
able
to say them.” She shakes her head at Isabel.

Isabel blinks at her friend in shock. “You baited me!” She scrunches up her paper napkin and throws it at Jamie’s head, pleased when it lands in the middle of her forehead.

“That was mature.” Jamie gives her a withering look. “I just wanted to figure out if you even
knew
how you feel about him. And mission accomplished, it looks like you do.”

“Yay for me.” Isabel raises her hand in a mock cheerleader pose.

“So what happens now?” Jamie looks at her expectantly.

“What do you mean what happens now? I’ve got some work to do back at the boarding house and you have to help your mom with her yard sale…” Isabel trails off at the serious amount of eye rolling she’s getting from her friend.

“I meant, what happens now between you and lover boy.” Jamie plants her elbows on the table and leans forward, as if Isabel is going to let her in on some kind of secret.

“Nothing happens, Jamie. What can happen?” Isabel looks up at the blue sky, sighing deeply. “He’s gone and he’s not coming back. He said he couldn’t put me in danger and that was that.” She shrugs, wishing her emotions could be locked away so easily.

“So call him! Tell him how you feel, that you miss him and all that other good stuff. The man is clearly crazy about you. He’d be an idiot to let you go!” Jamie snaps her fingers to illustrate the point.

Isabel shakes her head. “The problem, Jamie, is that he was right.” She holds her hand up to stop her friend from interrupting her. “I couldn’t have allowed him to bring his problems, the people he deals with, down on the boarding house. Wesley made it pretty clear that his biker friends would burn it to the ground without a second thought if they wanted to.” Jamie’s eyes widen in shock. “I couldn’t let that happen to my mom’s place. And what if the next time Jimmy or one of his friends decides to pay me a visit, Wes isn’t there to protect me? Then what?”

Jamie nods, looking down at the table as if she’s a little ashamed at herself for not realizing that point. “You’re right. I hadn’t thought of that.” Jamie bites her bottom lip, annoyed that she’d let her romantic notions override her sense for her friend’s safety.

“This is the way it was always going to play out.” Isabel shrugs, resignedly. “I knew what he did, that he led a dangerous life, but I didn’t care, because he made me feel like no one ever has before. I was this close,” she holds up her index and thumb denoting less than an inch, “this close from throwing everything away because it was getting to the point where I didn’t want to imagine my life without him.” She shakes her head, knowing she had been reckless. But, if she’s honest with herself, if she had to do it all over again, she’s not sure she would do it any differently.

“Jesus, Issy. You couldn’t have just picked a nice normal guy.” Jamie frowns at her friend.

“Oh yeah, as if those are the ones you ever go for.” Isabel narrows her eyes at her friend who has the decency to look a little sheepish.

“Fair point.” Jamie doesn’t even try to deny it.

“Besides, I can’t get in touch with him even if I want to.” Isabel continues her explanation when Jamie gives her a curious look. “I tried to call him a couple of days ago. I don’t know what I thought I was going to say. But it didn’t matter. The number had been disconnected. And it’s not like he left a forwarding address.”

“So, he’s just gone? Just disappeared? Who does that?” Jamie makes a face to highlight just how lost she would be without being surgically attached to her own cellphone.

“People who are running from the law, I guess.” Isabel says the phrase with such sanguine acceptance that anyone overhearing them would think she’d been accustomed to a life of crime.

“Good point.” Jamie takes another sip of her coffee, giving the street ahead of them a worried look as if she expects the cops to show up right there and then. Although Jamie had been a wild child, she’s never really gotten into any trouble. It’s pretty ironic that Isabel, the one who is always warning Jamie about her wild ways, is the one who ended up being involved with someone truly dangerous.

“You know what the worst part is though, Jay?” Isabel laughs a little at herself. “If I had it to do all over again, knowing then what I know now, I don’t think I would change anything.” She shakes her head, knowing how illogical that is. “As crappy and as heartbroken as I feel now, I don’t wish I never met him or that I hadn’t fallen for him. I know it doesn’t make any sense, but it’s just how I feel.”