The Pages We Forget (13 page)

“Tonight,” June said and looked past Alex and her family at the other bewildered stares in the theater.

“Leatrice,” Bernard shouted under his breath. “I want to know what's going on and I want to know now.”

“I tried to talk her out of it,” Leatrice tearfully replied. “But she wouldn't listen.”

“You tried to talk her out of what?”

“Just listen.”

“Tonight,” June continued, “is a very special night for me because tonight is my swan song. It will be my final performance.”

“Her what?” Bernard shouted to Leatrice.

“I tried,” Leatrice answered and then walked away.

“Sit down, Trevor,” Alex ordered his son, who sprang to his feet upon hearing his mother's announcement.

Like everybody else, Trevor couldn't believe what he was hearing. “But, Dad!”

“Please, Trevor,” Alex pleaded. “Not now.”

Kathryn reached for Trevor's hand and guided him back into
his seat. She was as surprised by June's announcement as everyone else. But she was even more surprised by the lack of a response from Alex. He sat calmly with his eyes fixated on June.

June could feel him staring at her and she knew if she didn't hold her head up and look at him now, she would never be able to face him. She walked to the front of the stage and stopped directly in front of him. She still had not looked into his eyes when the orchestra began to play “The Pages We Forget.”

“Yesterday's songs,” June closed her eyes and sang. “Some live forever. Their rhythm and their rhyme, still playing melodies in our minds. A story behind each, of a love we both promised to keep. So many, many years, of lonely nights filled with tears.”

She had to look at him now.

“Our eyes tell stories, of how we used to be,” she sang and then opened her eyes and gazed into his.

There were no stories in his eyes.

“Memories locked inside, never to be free,” she sang.

No memories.

“And now after all this time, we pass like we've never met. Neither wanting to remember, the pages we forget.”

She saw nothing. Nothing at all in his eyes.

(lyrics and arrangement by June)

My heart can't take no more of you.

You're tearing me down.

I wish you'd go—walk out my heart's door.

Don't come this way no more.

I gave you my heart, you gave it back.

I guess it wasn't enough.

That's why you're leaving, you're saying bye.

But this time, I'm not gonna cry.

'Cause my love is gone.

You were so wrong.

And it's time, I let you move on.

CHORUS:

This time, I hope I've seen the last of you.

This time, I'll accept that we're through.

My heart won't break, my eyes won't cry.

I'll be finally free of you.

This time, when you turn and walk away.

This time, I hope you're going to stay.

I won't let you break my heart this time.

No, not this time.

We can't keep going round and round.

Sooner or later, the bridge will fall down.

Still, I care about you—might can't live without you.

But this time, I'm finally through.

No longer will you darken my day.

There's a brighter tomorrow coming my way.

Still old memories, they linger on,

even though the clouds are gone.

And, it doesn't matter

who's wrong or right,

because I'm saying good-bye tonight.

CHORUS

(Repeat to fade)

T
he Pioneer Day Festival would have to go on without her. Someone else would lead the gaslight antique car parade down Willow Street. Last year's festival director could fire the gun to start the bed race around Town Hall. Mayor Alexander wouldn't mind crowning one of the six local beauties vying for the title of Miss Pioneer Day. Although Kathryn had spent the past eight months working tirelessly to make this year's annual festival the best ever, she wasn't about to leave her daughter alone after June's unexpected announcement. Swarms of puzzled fans and unruly paparazzi descended on the Fox Theatre following the concert.

June's security team suggested that Kathryn, Trevor, and Lucy Kaye wait for June in the limo parked at the rear exit of the theater. Kathryn and Trevor vehemently refused to leave June's side, even after she asked them to wait for her in the car.

As soon as Willie, one of June's personal bodyguards, pushed the theater's back door open, the swarm attacked. June, holding her mother and son's hands, exited the theater behind Willie and Joe and four members of the theater's security staff.

“June! June! Why are you quitting?” a tall, slender, middle-aged photographer yelled over the crowd of screaming fans.

“Bernard is on his way out! He will answer all of your questions!” Willie yelled. “Now back up!”

“June! June! Look this way! Let me get a good shot!” a young man holding a camera high above the crowd yelled. “Help me out, June! I need the money!”

June pulled Trevor closer to her.

“Hey, man, can you tell us anything?” a young TV reporter yelled to Alex, who, with Leatrice, walked a step or two behind June and the others. “Talk to us, Alex!”

Alex didn't respond. He didn't feel he should have to. After all, he had no say in her decision to walk away from the life they'd built together. She didn't ask him what he thought or how he felt. She didn't even bother to tell him beforehand. He had to hear about it when she told the rest of the world. And even if he chose to respond to the reporter's question and take control like he normally did when things got this chaotic, what could he tell them? She's quitting to spend more time with her family? She's grown tired of performing and wants to try something different while she's still young enough to start over? Or maybe even, she simply wants to be left alone? He thought about all the things he could say to explain what had happened, but she made this decision without him, so she was going to have to deal with the avalanche of questions, rumors, and broken contracts that were sure to follow without him.

The wave of camera flashes was blinding, so June let go of her mother's hand and covered her eyes. Kathryn put her arm around June and clung to Willie with the other as they made their way to the waiting limo.

The theater's security personnel and a handful of police officers were already struggling to keep the near riotous crowd back. However, after two photographers jumped over the retention barricade, other photographers followed, starting a stampede.

“Get Trevor to the car!” June yelled to Joe. “Get Trevor!”

Joe and Willie pulled June, Trevor, and Kathryn in between them and then pushed their way toward the limo.

“Alex, what are you doing?” Leatrice yelled as she fought her way through the stampeding crowd. “Don't just stand there! Help her!”

Alex turned, looked at Leatrice, and then asked, “Why should I?”

“Alex, what—” Before she could finish her question, an overzealous fan pushed her to the ground trying to get to June.

“You bastard!” Alex hit the man before he knew it. The lick did little to slow him down. The man shook it off and retaliated by charging into Alex, knocking him to the ground.

“Alex!” June screamed and snatched away from Joe. She fought her way back to where Alex and the man were scuffling. “Get off of him, you son-of-a-bitch!” June grabbed the man's hair. Leatrice already had her hands wrapped around the man's neck. “Let him go!” June yelled.

“Ma!” Trevor cried. Lucy Kaye, who was already in the limo, grabbed Trevor's arm and pulled him inside.

“Junie! Junie!” Kathryn tried to get away from Willie but couldn't.

“Mrs. Thomas, get in the car,” Willie pleaded with her. “We'll get her.”

“Willie, get my baby!” Kathryn yelled as Lucy Kaye pulled her inside the vehicle. “Get my baby!”

Willie knocked several people over as he bulldozed his way through the mayhem. By the time he reached June, Joe had already ended the fight with a short jab to the man's head.

“Get June and Leatrice to the car!” Joe shouted to Willie. “I'll get Alex!”

Willie covered June and Leatrice and Joe shielded Alex as they pressed toward the car.

“Ma!” Trevor yelled and pulled June into the car as soon as she was within arm's reach. “Ma, are you all right?”

“I'm okay.” June fell back in the seat next to Trevor.

Willie helped Alex and Leatrice into the car and yelled for the driver to take off. The limo sped away. Joe pulled up in the Pathfinder and Willie got in. The Pathfinder followed the limo as it made its way down Woodward Avenue, through downtown, and up East Jefferson Street.

No one said anything inside the limo as it headed for Grosse Pointe. Everyone except for Alex stared out at the city's skyline, the lights on Belle Isle, and anything else to distract them from each other. Alex's eyes targeted June. After several minutes, June found the courage to look at Alex, who sat directly in front of her. She turned away quickly to avoid his bemused gaze, but turned and looked back into his eyes. She'd never seen him look at her the way he was looking at her now. His eyes were fixated on her, but he was looking through her as though she wasn't there.

That scared her.

The car stopped for a traffic light at the intersection of East Jefferson and St. Jean. Kathryn broke the silence while the vehicle was idling. “Is everybody okay?”

“I'm all right,” Leatrice answered.

“Trevor?”

“I'm okay, Gramps.”

“Junie?”

“I'm fine, Ma.”

“Alex?”

He answered by not answering.

Kathryn turned to Alex, who was seated next to her, and placed her hand on his clenched fist. He was still, but she could feel the
hurt and the anger raging inside of him. “Everything's going to be all right,” she told him, squeezing his hand to comfort him.

He didn't flinch. He barely moved, despite a slight trickle from his mouth.

“Oh God!” June yelled when she noticed Alex's busted lip. “Your mouth is bleeding.” She hurried over to the seat beside him.

Leatrice turned on the backseat light to help June attend to Alex.

June tried to wipe blood from the corner of his mouth with a handkerchief.

“Don't touch me!” He knocked her hand away. “Stay away from me.”

“Alex, I think—” Kathryn tried speaking in calm tones to intervene in what she felt would become a highly emotional situation.

“I don't mean any disrespect, Mrs. Thomas, but please stay… No. Don't worry about it.”

“Alex, I don't know what to say except I'm sorry,” June said.

“You're always sorry!” he yelled. “Always!”

“What if I had told you, Alex?” June asked. “What would you have said?”

“I don't know what I would have said, but at least I would have had the chance to say
something
. You didn't give me a chance to say anything. Not one word. You didn't give a damn about how I was going to feel.”

“Alex, please…” Kathryn tried to say something.

“I'm sorry, Mrs. Thomas, but for the last three or four months your daughter has walked around like nothing matters except what Junie wants. She keeps forgetting that this is our life. Not just her life. Ours!”

“Yes, it is our life,” June retaliated and sat back in her seat. “But
can't I decide some things by myself or do I have to ask you for permission every time I get ready to go to the bathroom?”

“You don't have to ask me anything anymore, Junie. I really don't care what you do. You can do anything you want and go anywhere you want from now on. So stop feeling sorry for me and just do it. Go find him if that's what you want!”

“Junie, what is he talking about?” Kathryn asked.

June didn't answer.

“It's your life, Junie. Nobody's but yours. So, why don't you tell your mother what's really happening?”

“I don't know what you're talking about, Alex.”

“Don't cop out now, Junie,” Alex pushed forward. “This is what you want, isn't it?”

“Alex, June, can't this wait until you get home?” Leatrice tried to ease the tension. “Please.”

“No, this can't wait,” Alex answered. “I want Junie to tell everyone what this new album's really all about. Or rather,
who
it's about.”

Lucy Kaye looked at June. She had seen the CD's cover, and she'd listened to the fourteen songs about lost love, broken promises and wishful thinking. And although she felt
The Pages We Forget
was June's best album, the songs were nothing more than songs to her, another album to frame and place on the wall beside June's other three albums. Without trying, she made herself ignore the obvious.

“Junie?” Lucy Kaye waited for an answer.

Alex forced the issue. “Mrs. Adams is asking you a question, Junie.”

“Please don't do this, Alex,” June begged.

“Why not? You've let me live a lie for the past ten years. Ten years, and all the time it's been your life. Not ours. Isn't that what you said, Junie?”

“Alex, I know you're upset, but please think about what you're saying,” Kathryn urged.

“Why?” Alex asked. “Give me one good reason why we shouldn't throw away all the lies and let the chips fall where they may. Just one!”