The Forgotten (10 page)

Moving over to the young woman, she patted her on the shoulder to wake her up.

“Come on, Bianca, it is past your bedtime,” she said softly.

She noticed that Christi had either packaged up the stew or eaten it all. She could be quite gluttonous at times.

“Hmm…what?” Bianca muttered. She woke up with a start and looked at the kitchen clock. “Drat. I missed my shift. I told Christi I would do the late night shift for her.”

“I wouldn’t worry about that. There was a meeting up at the castle and attendance was very low here at the Tavern tonight.”

Her hands still felt slippery from the healing salve that she’d applied to Lucan’s wounds. Curious to see what it would do to Bianca’s scars, she grabbed Bianca’s chin and tilted her face toward her.

“What…what are you doing?” Bianca asked, still attempting to rouse herself from her inebriated state.

“Let me see what this does when I rub it onto your scars.” She smoothed what little remained of the salve onto Bianca’s face and watched as most of the scarring vanished instantly. She inhaled a shocked lungful of air. “By the Gods, that was amazing! Stay here,” she muttered, racing out of the kitchen, she dashed up the steps to Lucan’s room.

“Did you have second thoughts about keeping me company? I’m hungry for you, not food,” he drawled out seductively.

At the luscious sound of his voice, her stomach dipped and a deep thrill raced through her. Oh, how she could be tempted by this man, in fact, if she were a weaker woman she’d already be in his rapturous embrace!

“If you let me take this healing salve to use on Bianca, you might be able to have food and my company, that’s how grateful I’ll be,” she said in a low voice.

His face lit up in a most glorious way. She didn’t doubt that he could get any woman in his bed when the dimple in his left cheek shone. His smile, his smile had sunshine and rainbows in it…never before had she seen a man with such a gloriously genuine grin.

“You may use however much you need. I doubt you’ll need that whole container anyway, take heed, Neri. If Bianca was burned by magical fire, or dark magic, that salve will only fade the scars, it won’t eradicate them completely. If Ulwyn just burned her with regular fire than there is a very good chance they will completely remove the scarring.”

She nodded her head, dipped her hand into the salve and left the room.

With hope in her heart, she made her way back down to the kitchen.

Bianca sat with a cup of passion flower tea cradled in her hands. She looked a bit perkier than she had only minutes before.

“What did you put on my face? Whatever it was it made it feel so much better. Sometimes, it’s not the scarring that depresses me so, it’s the lingering pain that radiates across my face and tingles up into my skull,” she mused, touching her face lightly.

“Let me rub more of it on you. It’s a healing salve. Lucan brought it from the Crown City. The healing mages of Shardizar truly have miraculous healing powers. The salve healed his wounds—I didn’t have to lift a finger to help him aside from rubbing this over the affected areas!”

Bianca stood up, the chair scrapping across the stone floor as she did so. “Are you telling me that the salve healed my scars? It must be a miracle in a jar, for I’ve never heard of such wonder before. I’ve heard tell of such tales about the healing mages but our village hasn’t had a local healing mage in over one hundred years.”

Neri nodded her head. Bianca’s hand flew to her mouth as she let out a little shocked sigh. “I haven’t looked in a mirror for ages…I know I shouldn’t be so vain, but whenever I see what my own father did to me—“ Choking up, she stopped speaking. Tears welled in her eyes.

Neri rubbed the remaining salve onto her scars and drew her into a hug as the ointment did its healing duty.

“I know, Bianca. Your father is a cruelly sadistic man. None could sympathize with you more than I. I know what it’s like to be forsaken and forgotten by your family. My own father and mother watched as I was sentenced to my death. They each had vindication in their eyes—not sorrow or heartbreak—I could not fathom being related to them by blood in that horrible moment.

They actually believed I was getting what I deserved—they had determined that my death would cleanse their family honour. Never ever let what your father did to you, define your life, Bianca. You are better than he is—you will eventually rise above it. Had I known that such a cure existed for you, I would have walked all the way to the nearest village that was equipped with a healing mage. I am so sorry that you’ve had to suffer through this for all of these years with only my clumsy healing skills to help you along.”

Bianca smiled at her. “I feel sleepy. I think I should go and retire to my bed before I pass out here in the kitchen again. I know I must look like an awful lush to His Grace.”

Neri smiled benevolently at her. “Don’t worry about how you look to Lucan. He doesn’t judge. You had a justifiable reason to drown your sorrows in the drink. It’s a lot more than what I can say for the men who come to this Tavern and drown themselves in spirits. They do not carry a heavy burden like you—they haven’t felt true misery the way you and I have been touched by it. Lucan was a bit curious at first, but I explained the situation to him. I do think you need to try not to rely on the bottle so much. Living and working in a Tavern is a constant temptation for you—“

“I will do it. I’ll lay off the spirits just for you, Neri. I swear to the Gods and Goddesses that I will. I’ve not lived up to your expectations and I’ve let poor Christi pick up the slack for me way too many times.”

She looked at Bianca’s face. Most of the scarring was gone, thanks be to the Gods and the mages that had concocted that divinely blessed healing salve. Unfortunately, she still had a few lingering scars, telling her what she’d always suspected, that bastard Ulwyn had used a bit of dark magic to abuse his daughter with.

Neri could only pray that the lingering pain that the scars caused Bianca had vanished with the application of the healing salve.

“I will make you proud,” Bianca professed.

“You already have, Bianca. You and Christi have gone on under extraordinary circumstances. Tomorrow morning, I won’t be around, you know what tomorrow commemorates.”

Bianca’s eyes filled with dawning sadness. “Aye, Neri. I remember. I take it Rhiannon will be absent this year as well?”

She nodded her head. “I can’t risk having her return to Glynneath. Your father’s evil eye liked her far too much for my taste. Keeping her away from me is the only way I can keep her safe.”

“Aye, I completely understand that. He had a sick adoration for Rhiannon. Her beauty is quite unique. She looks far too much like a fairy and that is why my father is so attracted to her. He loves tales of the old fairies and elves that used to roam this land. I wonder if they will ever return.”

“We drove them away to their Hidden Realms in the North. I doubt they will ever travel to these lands again.”

“Never worry, Neri, we’ll take care of things around here while you’re gone. If the pain becomes too much, just know that Christi and I will be here to help you through it should you need us.”

“The members of the Resistance might trickle in starting tomorrow morning. A battle is brewing, Bianca—and our freedom hinges on the outcome. If we take away the power your father wields, Lucan will be able to reclaim his birthright.”

“The Duke seems to know how to handle himself. The rumours of how he helped Brett and his mother have spread like wildfire throughout the village and outlaying area. It has birthed a sense of hope that we’ve lacked. Now people believe there is a way to usurp my bastard of a father. Kavon Sewell came in earlier to tell us all about it. He was so very happy, Neri. I haven’t seen him so animated in such a long time. He looked at me like he used to look at me before my father burned me.”

Kavon Sewell was a shifter of minimal strength. He didn’t like being under Ulwyn’s thumb any more than the rest of those who served as Neri’s spies. Before Bianca had been burned by Ulwyn she and Kavon had been set to marry.

Afterward, Kavon and she had gone their separate ways and Neri had reason to believe that someday Kavon would summon enough courage to ask Bianca to be his mate and his wife.

“Maybe he’ll take his head out of his ass one of these days, Bianca, and ask you to become his wife. The two of you were so close before the incident.”

“Kavon won’t want me now. I’m damaged goods, Neri. No man would want me, let alone, a man like Kavon. He could have any woman he wanted. He has the looks of a God and I look like something that should be living under a bridge.”

“Don’t ever say that again, Bianca. You are not damaged goods. Beauty is not just skin deep. It’s found in the soul as well. He was a complete fool for pushing you out of his life—whether he thought it was for your own good or not, he had no right to do it. I would say he wasn’t good enough for you now, giving how he abandoned you when you needed him the most but I know how much you still love him. For your own benefit, I think you need to take another chance on love. He risks being a spy in your father’s household because of his feelings for you. I can see it in his eyes every night when he comes down for a pint or two. I believe he hates the fact that he gave you up when he should have stood firmly by your side.”

“Fine advice coming from you, Neri. You keep all men at bay. All men save for Sir Lucan—he seems to be the only man that has affected that hard shell you’ve erected around yourself. Maybe he’ll finally puncture a hole in it and find a way to reach your blessed heart.”

“I admit I’ve grown wary of men. A man ripped my life apart, and yet, it was a man who saved me from death, so they are all not the same—I know that. It’s just sometimes easier to cling to old pain instead of opening yourself up for the possibility of new pain. Loving someone makes you vulnerable, it sets you up for a great fall should that person ever betray you. I don’t ever want to be like that again, Bianca. I want to be free of having to feel.”

“You feel every day—and you feel deeply. You haven’t hardened your heart nearly enough, Neri. I know that your heart is bigger than most because you took Christi and me in when we had nowhere else to turn. You were our savior.”

“Just like Lucan’s father was my hero when I desperately needed one,” she said softly.

“Maybe his son can be your hero now. They are dead ringers for each other—it’s a fair bet that he’s just like his father—noble, true and good hearted to the very end.”

Neri considered Bianca’s words. Maybe the young girl had a point. Maybe Lucan could be her saving grace. Maybe they could be stronger together than they were apart.

“I really do feel like I’m going to drop. I need to sleep this off. I think I’d better hit the hay, Neri. You take care of yourself and don’t let Lucan get away. He’s a good man, and you deserve a man like him. You deserve a Knight Mage like him. Let him bewitch you with his beautiful magic.”

She laughed at Bianca’s words. Lucan and she hadn’t known each other for long. All of those years spent with his mother made her feel as if she’d known him forever. It was probably crazy of her and she might regret her actions tonight but she was going to give herself to him, and pray to the Gods above that she would not regret her actions as she’d done the last time she’d given a man her heart—but before she did any of that she had to tell Lucan her story. He had to know what he was in for—she wanted to think he’d love her despite everything that had happened to her in her past.

Lucan listened as Neri quietly slipped back into the room. The bedchamber was cast in darkness and he could have used his magic to bright the lights back on had she not turned his way and shone her glowing violet blue eyes at him.

“I have demons, Lucan,” her voice was soft and filled with lingering pain. Her mood blew through the room and settled around him.

“We all have demons, Neri.”

“My demons could actually come back to haunt me. They could come back to claim me with the vengeance of a thousand knight mages. You have to know why I came to be here in Shardizar. You have to know why your father saved me back in Avonry.”

“You knew my father?” he asked, something foreign stirred inside of him. He actually wanted to know more about his father and he wanted to hear her talk about him.

“I did, aye. Your father and your mother saved my life. They, alone, gave me what I needed to keep going when I wanted to die. They brought me out of the darkness and shone the light back into my world. They taught me that not everyone wanted to see me dead, and your mother never once judged me for my past sins—terrible though they might be.”

“I find it very hard to believe that you could have committed any sins,” Lucan said, praying that she would come to the bedside so he could see her and touch her.

“My family married me off when I was sixteen years old to a man I had only seen from afar. I barely knew him, and I definitely didn’t love him—not at first anyway. It was an advantageous match for both families, and my mother and father had the family honour riding on me.”

Her confession made the blood in his veins freeze. Anger stoked throughout him, he wanted to howl at the moon and he couldn’t give into temptation because she was opening up to him and she needed his support—he couldn’t be selfish enough to give into what he wanted right now.

“I wasn’t aware that arranged marriages were still a custom in Avonry.” He tried to keep the tone of his voice neutral for her sake. Fury tore through him at an alarming rate. He had always been against forcing love—and arranged marriages definitely constituted as forcing love.

“Among the royal families—yes, they are, they are still quite popular from what I hear even after one hundred and forty five years. They are the only way to keep the top tier families prosperous. We have more of a restricted class system there than you have here. There isn’t much chance for advancing past the rank of which you are born. Unlike here, where a peasant can rise to the rank of Knight Mage without having to worry about being looked down upon because of how they came into this world.”

“That’s only because our King believes any kind of talent should be nurtured. He has his certain prejudices but he never once cared a flying fart that I was the son of a tavern wench. He admired my skill and talents as a Knight Mage.”

He fell silent for a few moments, ruminating on his rise through the ranks from lowly squire to Knighted Mage.

“I guess I shouldn’t dislike him as much as I do in that case.”

“Oh, no, you can feel however you like about him. He can be a bastard of the highest rank. And the bastard you were married to—he hurt you, didn’t he?”

“I didn’t know what to expect when I married Prince Ryn. He was unlike any man I had ever known, and he possessed power the likes of which I’d never seen before in my short life. I knew that he had a reputation of being somewhat of a ladies man, but our destinies were mapped out, both of our families wanted us to have a fruitful union that would benefit both of our Houses. Unlike Shardizar, there are several principalities in Avonry, all ruled over by one High King, and the other Princes and Kings of the Realm pay fealty to the High King. That High King was Ryn’s father.”

“So, you were born a Princess.” He tried to keep the condemning tone out of his voice, knowing that it would probably offend her.

He was born a common man and though he’d sworn his lifetime allegiance to Grifon’s father, he still viewed himself as a common man.

“No, I only had the title of Lady, before I married Ryn. My mother was a Princess, her father was the third son of the Fourth Royal House of Avonry. When she married my father—a wealthy land baron, she knew her children would have no royal titles, only noble ones. Still, her parents encouraged the alliance as they desperately needed the gold my father possessed. My father had a cunning intellect, he knew marrying my mother would advance him where he wanted to go and would open the other royal houses to him.”

“And so you were sold off like an animal.”

She took a step toward him, and then hesitated. “Perhaps, you won’t want to hear the rest of my story, it only gets worse from here on in, Lucan.”

He stood up and crossed the distance that lay between them. “I want to hear anything you feel willing to share with me, Neri.”

“My husband wasn’t the ogre I imagined him to be when I married him. I was such a scared little thing on our wedding day. I imagined he was going to be the piggish brute that my father was, and indeed, he was the exact opposite. His ways and mannerisms were refined, he was gentle when it came to loving me. He made the effort to woo me and had earned my undying devotion and love after only a few months. I was so content, Lucan.

I believed I was the luckiest woman in all of the realms. I had found my Prince, and I was living the dream. Life with Ryn was much easier than my life with my parents had been, and the best part was, he kept me protected from my father’s hard hand. I had the choice of whether or not I wanted to see my parents. If I didn’t desire their company, Ryn would have them showed out of the Palace. He was always on my side, no matter what.

After we were married we were happy for about twenty years, until I discovered that my matrimonial paradise wasn’t as idyllic as I had always believed. During our entire married life, he’d kept a harem of women on the side. My heart was shattered into a billion little pieces, I was left raw. I was broken. Everything I had been led to believe was a farcical lie. He never really loved me, if he had, he never would have been able to keep all of those women.

I never turned him away from our marriage bed, Lucan. I never ever denied him any kind of intimacy. The thing that hurt me the most was the fact that I had been so stupid. I had actually believed that he loved me, when the thought was absurd. Ours was obviously not a fairy tale love story.

We were both extremely flawed people. After I learned that he’d been so unfaithful to me, I decided to enact my revenge, thinking that if he could do it—I could do it as well. So, I took a lover. He was a male courtier of fairly low birth, and though he wasn’t as good looking as my husband, he did what I needed him to do—he made me forget my troubles.

How could I have known that I was surrounded by spies? I was blatantly naïve. I couldn’t begin to predict the trouble that would come my way.”

“I take that it was perfectly fine for your husband to have his many paramours but you were expected to remain faithful and be the dutiful little wife. He was a hypocrite of the highest class!”

“You could say that. I always believed that Ryn loved me—even though he’d shared his body with other women and possibly men, I thought deep down that he felt something for me—I was wrong…he didn’t love me anymore than my new lover, Glen did. Neither of them cared one toss about me and when it came to answering for our sins, they made sure that only I was the one put in chains—and sentenced to death. The men in Avonry are always treated better than the women. I don’t know how it is now but back when I was at Court the eldest child of the High King was a girl and she wanted the throne with a burning longing. Ryn was second in line behind his brother, the heir to the throne.”

Rage sparked within Lucan. He wanted to kill everyone that had ever hurt her. He wanted to seek vengeance against the bloody hypocrites that had caused her so much grief. He put his hands on her shoulders, which were slightly trembling.

“I know what I did was wrong—and by the Gods, I should have stopped myself and I couldn’t. All I wanted to do was hurt Ryn when the person I was really hurting was myself. How very short sighted I was. I was such a little fool. I unknowingly sealed my own fate when all I had to do was sit and bear it—happiness could have been mine. Instead, I ruined everything. I was weak—I was so very weak.”

She hung her head. He took his right hand and tipped her face up so he could drink in the glorious beauty she possessed. Her eyes still glowed with the deep emotions she felt.

“You are going to hate me now,” she whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks and emotion cresting her voice.

“I could never hate you, Neri. I knew the first moment I laid eyes on you that you were the woman for me, and I pray you feel the same way about me. I knew I could never give you up and prayed to the Gods that you would feel the same way.”

“When I fell pregnant with child and told Glen that I was with child and therefore had to break our relationship off, he turned me in. He told the High King and the Queen that I had bewitched him with my magic and that I had seduced him against his will. He betrayed me without a second thought.”

“How did you know it wasn’t Ryn’s baby?”

“My husband had scads of women he kept and not one of them had borne him a bastard. That confirmed that he was the problem—not me.”

“I see.” He didn’t see. He couldn’t understand any of it. So she’d had an affair and gotten pregnant—none of it seemed scandalous enough or wicked enough to earn her a death sentence.

“I’m a wicked woman, and I have no defense for myself. I was wrong to do what I did—and so was Ryn.”

“If you are a wicked woman, Neri, then I am a wild man. I do not condemn you for your actions, I only wish I could have punished those who treated you so ill.”

She closed her eyes as if she needed to fortify herself against the incoming waves of pain.

“It gets worse, Lucan. Ryn’s family decided to haul me into His Majesty’s Royal Court upon which representatives from the Nine Royal Houses served as judges. They condemned me. My parents testified against me telling the Court that I was always morally reprehensible and that they had no wish to defend me.

They pitched me into darkness. They left me without allies—without friends. After my mother followed my father’s scathing testimony, with her own detailing what a horrible daughter I was, I could barely keep my composure. For the first time in my life I felt the small amount of Huntress blood stirring within me. I wanted to strike them all dead, Lucan. Gods help me, if I hadn’t been with child and therefore limited by what I could do—changelings are depowered when they are pregnant, I would have killed them all. The rage inside of me was so voracious.”

“I completely understand, Neri. You were in an unimaginable situation.”

“The moment that totally broke me was when Ryn denounced me. He told them all that it was my den of iniquity that made him wander from his marriage vows. He told them all what they expected to hear—and any belief that my husband had genuinely cared about my well-being was shattered in that terrifying soul sucking instant. He looked at me with such coldness in his eyes. He wanted me and my babe dead, and I could see that he would do anything to make it happen. I believed I was doomed. I was returned to my jail cell to await my death by fire.” Emotion strangled her voice and he yearned to pull her into his arms and kiss her tears away. The tears sparkled like white jewels on her cheeks.

“How did you escape?” he asked, his voice hoarse. He wanted to howl at the moon, the rage he felt inside of him burned so.

“I didn’t escape. I was helped by those who believed I had gotten the raw end of the deal. They had little sympathy for Ryn and knew the true nature of his being. The guard that freed me told me that I didn’t deserve death, and released me from my jail cell. He gave me the red hunter cloak and the blade that had belonged to my Hunter ancestor. Evidently, my childhood nursemaid had found a way to gain entrance to my parents’ home so she could give me what she believed I needed. In my hour of need she was the only one who still cared about me—hers was the only love I could count on.”

“And I take it this is where my father came in?”

“Your father helped me when I was fleeing the Royal Guards. He gave me the sanctuary of his covered carriage and wiped the blood from my hands. He gave me comfort and shelter when everyone else wanted my death.”

“I don’t understand, Neri. Why would you have blood on your hands?”

He could hear the rapid beating of her heart. She was in a turmoil, afraid that her confession would turn him against her.

“When the guard freed me from my cell, I went to my husband’s harem. With blood in my eyes, and vengeance in my heart, I found him close to the shadow of death in his massive luxurious bedchamber. I saw him dying on his massively luxurious bed, and my instincts kicked in. I ran to help him, foolishly thinking that I could do something to stem the flow of blood that rushed out of him as fast as water runs through a waterfall. He looked so very shocked to see me cradling him as he died. In that horrible moment, my hatred for him faded away. All I could remember was the good times—all I knew was that I was holding the first man who made me truly love him, and I was going to lose him for good this time.

He kept trying to speak and could only make gurgling noises. His eyes were frantic, and filled with what I hope was love and worry for me. For he cupped my face with his large hands as he used to do when we were making love, and he winked at me. I think that was his way of asking for my forgiveness when he couldn’t bring his failing body to say the words.