The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (525 page)

And now, all of my heart and soul finds

The object and the pleasure of mine eye,

As its sole pleasure

Is only Helena. To her, my lord,

Only Helena. I was, my lord,

Was I betroth'd ere I saw Hermia:

Meant to marry her before I ever saw Hermia,

But, like in sickness, did I loathe this food;

But as if I were sick and rejecting good food, I rejected this too.

But, as in health, come to my natural taste,

Now I am healthy and returned to my natural tastes,

Now I do wish it, love it, long for it,

And I wish for, love, and long for Helena,

And will for evermore be true to it.

And will forevermore be faithful to her.

THESEUS

Fair lovers, you are fortunately met:

Fair lovers, it is fortunate we met here.

Of this discourse we more will hear anon.

We will hear more about this soon.

Egeus, I will overbear your will;

Egeus, I must override your request:

For in the temple by and by with us

In the temple with Hippolyta and me

These couples shall eternally be knit:

These two couples will be wed for eternity.

And, for the morning now is something worn,

And as the morning is almost passed,

Our purposed hunting shall be set aside.

We will put our hunting trip on hold for another time.

Away with us to Athens; three and three,

Let us go to Athens now: three men and three women to marry,

We'll hold a feast in great solemnity.

Well we will have a great feast together.

Come, Hippolyta.

Let us go, Hippolyta.

Exeunt THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, EGEUS, and train

DEMETRIUS

These things seem small and undistinguishable,

Everything from last night looks small, and hard to make out,

Like far-off mountains turnèd into clouds.

Like a mountain far away that looks like distant clouds.

HERMIA

Methinks I see these things with parted eye,

I feel like I see the everything as blurry,

When every thing seems double.

Or in double vision.

HELENA

So methinks:

Yes, me too.

And I have found Demetrius like a jewel,

I feel like Demetrius is a jewel I have found,

Mine own, and not mine own.

And is thus mine, but also not mine, that someone else could claim him at any time.

DEMETRIUS

Are you sure

Is it certain

That we are awake? It seems to me

That we are all awake? It feels like

That yet we sleep, we dream. Do not you think

We are still asleep and dreaming. Was the duke

The duke was here, and bid us follow him?

Really here, and did he ask us to follow him?

HERMIA

Yea; and my father.

Yes, my father was here as well.

HELENA

And Hippolyta.

And Hippolyta.

LYSANDER

And he did bid us follow to the temple.

And he asked us to go to the temple with him.

DEMETRIUS

Why, then, we are awake: let's follow him

Well we are definitely awake, then. Let’s follow Duke Theseus

And by the way let us recount our dreams.

And tell each other our dreams as we walk.

Exeunt

BOTTOM

[Awaking] When my cue comes, call me, and I will

Tell me when it is my cue and I will

answer: my next is, 'Most fair Pyramus.' Heigh-ho!

say my line – the next one is “Most fair Pyramus.” Hello!

Peter Quince! Flute, the bellows-mender! Snout,

Peter Quince! Flute, the bellows-repairman! Snout,

the tinker! Starveling! God's my life, stolen

The repairman! Starveling! My God, they have left

hence, and left me asleep! I have had a most rare

while I was asleep! I had the strangest

vision. I have had a dream, past the wit of man to

dream. It is outside of the abilities of mankind

say what dream it was: man is but an ass, if he go

to explain it: a man is as foolish as a donkey if he tries to

about to expound this dream. Methought I was--there

explain the dream of mine. I thought I was -- well

is no man can tell what. Methought I was,--and

no one can really say what exactly. I thought I was -- and I

methought I had,--but man is but a patched fool, if

thought I had -- but someone would be an idiot to

he will offer to say what methought I had. The eye

say what I thought I had. A man’s eye

of man hath not heard, the ear of man hath not

has not heard, his ear has not

seen, man's hand is not able to taste, his tongue

seen, his hand cannot taste, and his tongue

to conceive, nor his heart to report, what my dream

cannot touch, nor his heart explain, what my dream

was. I will get Peter Quince to write a ballad of

was. I will ask Peter Quince to write a ballad song

this dream: it shall be called Bottom's Dream,

about my dream and will call it “Bottom’s Dream,”

because it hath no bottom; and I will sing it in the

because it doesn’t have a bottom, and I will sing it

latter end of a play, before the duke:

at the end of the play, in front of the duke.

peradventure, to make it the more gracious, I shall

In fact, to make it even more lovely, I will

sing it at her death.

sing it when Thisby dies.

Exit

Athens. QUINCE'S house.

Enter QUINCE, FLUTE, SNOUT, and STARVELING

QUINCE

Have you sent to Bottom's house ? is he come home yet?

Have you been to Bottom’s house? Is he home yet?

STARVELING

He cannot be heard of. Out of doubt he is

No one has heard anything. I’m certain he has been

transported.

taken.

FLUTE

If he come not, then the play is marred: it goes

If he does not come, then the play is ruined – it

not forward, doth it?

can’t go forward, right?

QUINCE

It is not possible: you have not a man in all

It’s impossible – no one in all

Athens able to discharge Pyramus but he.

of Athens can play Pyramus convincingly except for Bottom.

FLUTE

No, he hath simply the best wit of any handicraft

I agree – he is the smartest of all handymen

man in Athens.

in Athens.

QUINCE

Yea and the best person too; and he is a very

Yes, and the best looking man, as well. And he is a very

paramour for a sweet voice.

paramour for a sweet voice.

FLUTE

You must say 'paragon:' a paramour is, God bless us,

You mean “paragon,” a paramour is

a thing of naught.

something bad.

Enter SNUG

SNUG

Masters, the duke is coming from the temple, and

Everyone, the duke is leaving the temple, and

there is two or three lords and ladies more married:

two or three more men and women were married.

if our sport had gone forward, we had all been made

If we could have performed our play, we would have been rich

men.

men.

FLUTE

O sweet bully Bottom! Thus hath he lost sixpence a

Oh that Bottom! He has not lost getting paid sixpence

day during his life; he could not have 'scaped

every day of his life, I’m sure he would have been forced to take

sixpence a day: an the duke had not given him

sixpence a day, and if the duke would not have given him

sixpence a day for playing Pyramus, I'll be hanged;

sixpence a day for his performance of Pyramus, I would have hung myself.

he would have deserved it: sixpence a day in

Bottom would have deserved sixpence a day

Pyramus, or nothing.

to play Pyramus, or it’s nothing.

Enter BOTTOM

BOTTOM

Where are these lads? where are these hearts?

Where are you boys, where are you friends?

QUINCE

Bottom! O most courageous day! O most happy hour!

Bottom! Oh great timing, what a wonderful day!

BOTTOM

Masters, I am to discourse wonders: but ask me not

Friends, I have many odd things to tell you, but do not

what; for if I tell you, I am no true Athenian. I

ask me what they are. If I tell you, I am not an Athenian, and so I won’t.

will tell you every thing, right as it fell out.

Or I will tell you everything, just as it happened.

QUINCE

Let us hear, sweet Bottom.

Please tell us, Bottom.

BOTTOM

Not a word of me. All that I will tell you is, that

I will not tell you a single word except that

the duke hath dined. Get your apparel together,

the duke has eaten. Get your costumes together,

good strings to your beards, new ribbons to your

tie the beards on with good strings, and put new ribbons

pumps; meet presently at the palace; every man look

on your shows. We must go immediately to the palace. Everyone

o'er his part; for the short and the long is, our

look over your lines because, basically, the duke

play is preferred. In any case, let Thisby have

wants to hear our play. Anyway, give Thisby the

clean linen; and let not him that plays the lion

clean clothes and do not clip the nails of him who plays

pair his nails, for they shall hang out for the

the lion, for they should look like

lion's claws. And, most dear actors, eat no onions

lion claws. Oh, and actors: do not eat onions

nor garlic, for we are to utter sweet breath; and I

or garlic, because our breath should smell good. I

do not doubt but to hear them say, it is a sweet

am sure they will all say that ours is a pleasant and sweet