TakeItOff (6 page)

Chapter Six: Sexcapades

We’ve been with a lot of
women compared to most guys because of the nature of our work. Most of our
conquests were one-moment stands, rather than one-night stands. That’s what we
call sex that happens in the heat of the moment with a woman who just catches
your eye and who is hot and ready to fuck right then, right there. They give
you some of the biggest orgasms, probably because of the mystery of not knowing
who the woman is and having just met her. Knowing you have a mutual attraction
to one another and nothing else between you really makes the experience that
much more intense.

Being surrounded by so much
easy sex does have its downside. Sometimes you meet a girl who is so beautiful
that you want to take your time, really slow down and experience her, get to
know her. Sometimes you start to get jaded when you see women at their wildest
and you start thinking all women are loose.

The biggest downside is that
you can become a sex addict. When you start having more and more sex, you can
get bored with the average normal sex. You might try role playing or costumes.
When that gets old, the next step could be threesomes. This could last awhile
because, let’s face it, any night with two women is pretty much better than any
other night. But even still your curiosity wants more. Sex in public may be
next, like on a balcony of a hotel or on a train. When that’s not enough
anymore, a nice swingers resort down in Jamaica or on one of those nudist
cruises should do the trick. You could end up on the main stage of the onboard
amphitheater having sex with a lawyer’s wife in front of an auditorium full of
people cheering you on. If this happens, you’re a full-blown sex addict. You
realize you may have a problem, but you really don’t want to fix it. By now you’ve
pretty much done it all.

Then you meet a girl who is
just as addicted as you. You think it could work since she will let you do any
deviant sex fantasy you have. You’ve tied her up, ball gagged her, attached a
spreader bar to her ankles and fucked her with every dildo on the market and
any other cock-shaped device you can find. She loves it all. Life is good for
about two and a half weeks. Then one day you look down and she’s tying her
panties around your cock while you have a leather leash around your neck and
she’s making you talk to a phone sex hotline on speaker phone and you think,
maybe
I should find a twelve-step sex addicts anonymous program…naaaawwww, fuck it!

The Art of Getting Laid

Working with literally hundreds of strippers over a
twenty-year period between the two of us, we witnessed some guys with serious
skills when it came to getting laid. A former coworker of ours once said it
best: “Working as a stripper has totally killed my game!” What he meant by this
was that after he retired from the job, he found it harder to get laid. It wasn’t
so much that he couldn’t meet women or get laid, but that he no longer had the
skills to pick up a total stranger without knowing her name, and seal the deal
within an hour or two of meeting her.

The problem is the game board, not the game. When you work
as a stripper, you get to step inside a fantasy world, where the rules are much
more skewed so men have more power in the sex game. We get to pick and choose
on a good night. I once stated we get just a sample of what it must be like to
be a rock star, and let me tell you, it’s very intoxicating. I personally have
honed my skills to a razor’s edge. I can usually make a girl give me her phone
number within minutes, which will lead to a date, which will lead to sex. I
attribute half of my success to tricks I’ve learned from dancing. The other
half, I think, is because I love women so much and see the beauty in them. I
believe they have a way of sensing that. I’ve always been obsessed with women
and with gaining acceptance from them. I’m also addicted to sex. Like, really
addicted! I can’t get enough.

I often start off just winking at a girl. If she smiles,
then I’m in. Next step is to seal the deal. You never want to seem too serious
about anything. Especially her. After she smiles, I’ll go up to her and shake
her hand. As she grabs my hand, I’ll tickle her palm with my middle finger.
Nine times out of ten, she will giggle. Subconsciously, she just spent an
intimate moment with me in a room full of girls. I’ll ask her, “Hey would you
like to go on a date with me?” She always says yes, because she feels I picked
her specifically out of hundreds of other women. I’ll give her my number, tell
her to call me sometime and we will have dinner.

By the time I make it back to the dressing room, there is often
already a text on my phone (usually something like XOXO), and I’m on my way.

Bachelorettes Gone Wild

It’s a Saturday night in the middle of summer. I get called
out for a strip-o-gram at 10:30 p.m. I pull up outside the house where the
party is, get out my costume and adjust everything. I knock on the door and
when it opens, I see that the party is full of beautiful girls. All over the
walls are posters of naked guys and balloons are everywhere. On the coffee
table is an array of dildos that were given as presents to the bachelorette. I
can tell this is going to be a wild party because all the girls are wearing
mini-skirts and no panties.

I can barely finish the show without having sex with these
girls. They are all so pretty but I’m trying to be professional. They agree to
come back to the club and finish the night off there.

As soon as I leave, I text the contact girl and say that I
had a really good time. That way she has my personal cell number. She texts
back and says she can’t wait to see me at the club. They arrive just past
midnight, even more drunk and wild than they were at the party. They ask me to
do a table dance for the bachelorette. I walk over and start to dance. It’s a
packed night so girls are all around me and very close.

Halfway through the dance one of the other girls from the
party comes up and starts dancing behind me. This really gets the crowd’s
attention because of the crazy outfits that the party girls are wearing. As I
continue the dance, the girl who was behind me comes around and starts to
fondle the bachelorette. Yeah, down there! Mind you, they still haven’t put
their panties back on. Now the whole crowd around me is fixated on my table
dance so I put my hands up in the air and laugh with the crowd—like
these
girls are out of control. What the hell!
? But really I’m thinking,
Oh
yeah!!!

Then the girl who was fondling the bachelorette pulls out a
flashing strobe light dildo contraption. This thing is pretty big! Now I’m no
longer the star of the show, just a guy standing in the middle of two girls
having a crazy time. The crowd and I are just watching in amazement as the girl
starts rubbing that flashing dildo on the bachelorette’s face, forcing it into
her mouth and pinching her nipple with the other hand.

I don’t really want to stop the dance because they’re so hot
and I am getting turned on by it. But I don’t want the crowd to know that. The
girl starts to fuck the bachelorette with the dildo. Seriously! I can see the
whole thing! It’s impossible for the crowd not to see it as well, since that
the dildo is strobing and flashing like the Starship
Enterprise
.
Probably one of the craziest table dances I’ve ever done!

The Night the Lights Went Out at the Club

One Friday night, the electricity went out at the club. This
night was not particularly busy so the management told all the dancers to go
out and give free table dances to keep the women from leaving. Free dances are
generally frowned upon for many reasons. The first is to keep the guys from
spending all night dancing for just the hot chicks. Another reason is to keep the
customers used to paying for your time, rather than expecting their
entertainment for free. On this night, however, the free dances turned into
much more.

I grabbed the hottest chick I knew who was DTF (down to
fuck) and took her to the bathroom. I figured since it was almost completely
dark everywhere, it was about to turn into a freak show! We felt our way into
the stall and I pulled her panties down to her ankles and turned her back to
me, bending her over the toilet. My G-string thong (our normal dance attire)
was hanging just below my nut sac. I put on a condom and pushed my cock into
her wet pussy. It didn’t take long for me to explode! I threw away the condom,
washed up and told her to give me a couple minutes’ head start before leaving
so no one would see us leave together. Then I hightailed it out of the
bathroom. Didn’t even know her name. All I knew was her face.

After the electricity was back on, my buddy came up to me
and said, “Man! When the lights went out I grabbed this hot chick coming out of
the bathroom and danced for her. I got so hot that I stuck my finger in her
pussy! It was soooo wet, I had to fuck her right then and there. Man! She was
hot!”

By the time he finished the story and then pointed her out,
I had figured out that it was the same girl I had banged in the bathroom! I let
him know immediately and we just laughed our asses off!

Twice Is Nice

In the fantasy land of male
stripping, the dancers have a special power. This special power is very strong.
It is the power of “command”. If you dance long enough, you learn that you can
tell a girl to do something and she will do it. There were many times I told a
girl whom I just met to show me her boob and out it pops. Most girls are not
shy about their boobs. They always have a reason why their boobs are the best!
Backstage at the club, no sex is going on. Backstage at a roadshow, it’s
sometimes different. Girls backstage on a roadshow will almost always show
something. All the dancers have to do is be blunt and say, “Who’s gonna show some
skin?” Once the first girl shows hers, the rest follow suit. This leads to sex
in the bathroom or parking lot.

One dancer would always
disappear immediately after the show and then reappear fifteen minutes later.
We all knew he had done a girl somewhere and finished, and now was looking for
his second nut. We always laughed our asses off. He was like clockwork every
show. His money would not even be counted or straightened before he was off
hunting pussy.

He would lure the first girl
off somewhere and bang her while we were changing clothes. By the time we were
dressed, we’d come out and see him with the second one bent over an air
conditioner on the side of the building, going to town like a porn star.

His method was simple. He
would find a hot girl he liked then find a less attractive easy girl during the
show. When the show was over he would quickly throw his clothes on and go
straight for the easy one. Take her to a car or a private place around the club
and fuck her hard and fast until he came. He would say something charming and
make her feel good about what just happened, say his goodbyes and go in search
of the hotter, less easy one.

His reasoning was that he
liked them both and there was no way he was going to drive hours to the next
town all tense from no sex.

So just in case it fell
through with the hotter girl, he would do the easy one first. That way he got
laid at least once. Plus, it’s much easier to be sweet and less aggressive when
you just came. So this method worked to his advantage. After working off his
immediate needs with the first girl, he was ready to romance the hotter one.

He would take his time
charming her, maybe taking a nice walk somewhere away from everyone, holding
her hand. Then he would start to make out and touch her breasts, telling her
how beautiful she was and how good her tits felt. He’d pinch her nipples
through her blouse until they were hard and then open her shirt and squeeze and
suck them. He’d take his time going down on her, licking her thighs and pussy
until she was practically begging him to fuck her. Then maybe he’d pick her up
and put her against a wall and make sweet love to her with deep, slow thrusts until
he came again. Then he’d have her walk him to the tour bus and send him on his
way as relaxed as a man can possibly be after a hard day’s work, for a nice
long ride home.

Wingman’s Sacrifice

How do you know you have the
right wingman? You choose the hottest girl in the crowd, point to her and tell
your wingman to go get her and bring her to you in the dressing room. When he
arrives with her, you see that he has brought her not-so-pretty friend too. Then
he proceeds to take the ugly friend, even though he could easily have the
pretty one.

This leads to two couples
having sex in opposite ends of the bathroom. Which leads to my most awkward
orgasm.

My wingman sits his chick on
the sink and goes straight to the main event. He doesn’t bother to try to
impress her with a lot of foreplay because he is only doing her to allow me the
time to do her friend. So he just pushes her skirt up, pulls her panties off
and drives his dick in deep and hard. He is going fast trying to get it over
with before anyone catches us. I realize I need to hurry if I want to finish.

My chick is so hot I was
hoping for more time but now I’m feeling rushed. No time to enjoy those
beautiful breasts or that luscious ass. I get my hand up under her skirt and
into her panties. Luckily, she is wet already, so I pull her pants down to her
knees, and bend her over. Her ass is gorgeous and I’m practically coming just
looking at it. I slide into her fast and hard. Suddenly I hear my buddy getting
off. I’m pumping faster and faster and about to come when I look over and see
both my wingman and his chick watching us have sex. Immediately when I start to
climax, I pull out and try to jerk my cum off onto her ass. But because they’re
watching us, I am feeling a bit shy. My come face is not something I want an
audience for. I try to conceal the look on my face and my spurting cock by
turning away and facing a corner. The whole thing happened so fast and my
orgasm was cut in half by having my buddy and this woman staring at me like
they’re watching an episode of
Family Guy
.