Play Me (Love on Tour #2) (17 page)

“No, I don’t need money. Do you know what Sean pays me? I just bought a new condo, with cash. There’s no personal assistant in the world that gets paid what I do.”

“Well you’ll be a publicist soon and you’ll get a raise, and an additional client.”

“I’m not doing it for the money. It started because I wanted to help Baby out. Christie sees her as a liability.”

“A liability?”

“Yeah, a regular girl, no fame, and with a close personal relationship to you. And it wouldn’t matter if Sean found another publicist, they’d all see Baby that way. So that’s how it started. Now I’m taking the classes and I kinda like it.”

“Well, that’s cool I guess.”

“But lately it’s been a pain in the ass, because of you.”

“Me?”

He sighed. “There’s a couple pictures circulating of you and Baby holding hands, or with your arm around her, sometimes out on the town without Sean.”

“Is this that three-some bullshit again?”

“No, the groupies made that shit up to entertain themselves. This is in the fucking papers. They say that you and Baby are having an affair. Last week, one printed that Sean is leaving Baby over it.”

“Why didn’t I know about this?”

“I guess Sean and Baby didn’t think it was important to tell you. They think it’s a big joke. I don’t. I’m handling it. The point is, it’s not unprecedented for someone to think that, especially now.”

“Please tell me that I’m not sleeping with a woman dumb enough to believe what she reads in line at the grocery store.” I said.

“I’m not saying Bell got the idea from there. I’m just saying that’s it not the craziest thing in the world.”

“She should know better. I have fucking bled information to that girl. And she thinks me and Baby have a thing. Jesus!”

“Now wait. Did she accuse you of having a thing with Baby, or being in love with her? Because that’s two different things.”

“She didn’t actually accuse me of anything. She asked me if I was in love with Baby.”

Mike folded his hands behind his head. “I see.”

“You see what?”

“Well, it’s not that odd of a question to ask, especially from a woman who’s involved with you.”

“Again, she should know better.”

“I don’t know. She wasn’t there at the beginning. Your relationship with Baby probably looks pretty strange to someone who’s just showing up now.”

He actually had a good point. But I didn’t want to concede it. Not yet.

“Let’s get some breakfast,” I said. “I’m starving.”

“No one can sidestep a conversation like you, Hank.”

19

After breakfast Mike and I dinked around a little bit before heading to the bus. Mike made some excuse about needing to get something, so I walked onto the bus alone. It was just me and Tony.

I greeted Tony and he grunted something in response. Then I headed straight for the bed in the back. I leaned my back against the wall and stretched my legs out in front of me. I shut the curtain so I wouldn’t be disturbed. This was going to be an awkward bus ride, and I was perfectly content to sit back here, hiding, until we got to Oklahoma.

I expected to hear a stampede of feet and a few voices when they came on the bus. Instead, I heard one quiet set of feet, and nothing else. We were rolling before I had time to get alarmed. Then the curtain was thrown back, and there she was.

“Hi.”

I looked over her shoulder at the empty bus. “Where is everyone?”

“They thought we should have some alone time.”

She sat on the edge of the bed and pulled one leg up so she was facing me. “I told Sean and Baby about my suspicions.”

“And how did they react?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Sean laugh so hard. In fact, I think he had tears coming out of his eyes.”

“So I guess you could figure out that he’s not worried I’m going to try to seduce his wife.”

“I think that’s a safe bet.”

“And Baby?”

“She tried not to laugh at me.”

“So did you present your evidence to them?”

“Yes, but they wouldn’t address it. They said I should ask you.”

I took a deep breath. They were right of course. She had tried to ask me, but once again I’d walked away.

“I don’t want to fight anymore,” she said softly.

“Then let me just explain it to you. I get jealousy. That, I would have been okay with.” In fact, she was so blasé about the women that threw themselves at me, I wouldn’t mind a little more jealousy. “But being jealous of Baby, that’s just not fair.”

She looked at me and waited.

“Okay, top of the list. I let Baby call me Henry. The thing is, there are only two other people in my life who called me that, my mom and Mrs. Greenley. I had a difficult relationship with both, and very mixed feelings. When Baby first started calling me that, I was going to insist that she stop. But then she kind of turned it around for me. It made the memories not so bad.”

I ran my hand through my hair. I knew this wasn’t helping so far. “But Baby is absolutely the last person in the world I would ever have sex with… ever. So when you call me that, it kinda puts a damper on my sex drive.”

She smiled at this and lowered her head for a minute.

“I gave Baby the nickname within an hour of when we met. And yes, I thought she was hot then and I was considering trying to get into her pants. But that lasted all of a couple days. Believe me, it’s the furthest thing from my mind now.”

“As for the dates, well, you and I are only children, so it might seem weird. But did you know that when Sean’s sister comes to town Baby and I take off and give them some alone time? Same thing with Baby’s sister and her brother. It’s a sibling thing. And that’s what Baby is to me. She’s my little sister and I enjoy spending alone time with her. It’s really not a big deal.”

Bell leaned over, placing one arm on the opposite side of my legs. I liked that she was closer to me.

“As far as how I look at her. I really don’t know. But I do know that it is not the same way, at all, that I look at you.”

I pulled her onto my lap. She smiled and leaned in for a kiss.

“Shut the damn curtain!” Tony called from the front of the bus.

****

Bell and I were alone for the entire ride to Oklahoma City. We talked, we cuddled, we had sex. At some point I made an offer.

“Why don’t I take you out on a date.”

She got excited. “Yes! Please! Where should we go?”

“You name it. Anywhere you want.”

“I want to go to the symphony. We could go in Austin, we have an extra night.”

“The symphony?”

“Not your thing?”

“I appreciate all types of music. I’ve just never been to a symphony before.”

“You’ll love it,” she promised.

****

After the Oklahoma City show we headed straight to Austin on an overnight jag. We would have a free day before the show the following night. Baby loved Austin, so she and Sean were going out on the town. Bell and I had a date with strings and woodwinds.

On the bus, we were all pretty exhausted, but Mike had crashed out on the bed in the back. So Baby and Sean were cuddled up on one side of the booth, Bell and I were on the other. Both Sean and I were leaned up against the windows, the girls sprawled out in our arms.

“So I was wondering something,” Bell said, as she nestled her head deeper against my chest. “Why don’t you two play in the same band, rather than having two different bands?”

“We can’t,” Sean said.

“I don’t see why not. You collaborate on your music anyway,” Baby said.

“And,” Bell continued. “If you did team up, then you could have all kinds of different opening acts, instead of always opening for each other.”

“Opening acts are a pain in the ass,” I said.

“Oh my God!” Baby exclaimed. “I could meet so many different people.”

“We wouldn’t play with the bands you like anyway, Baby,” Sean said, clearly amused.

Baby frowned.

“It doesn’t matter,” I said. “It wouldn’t work. Sean and I are both front men.”

“There have been bands with two front men before.”

“I know what you’re thinking. Don’t even bring up the B-word, Baby. They are an exception to all things,” Sean said.

“Two singers and two front men aren’t the same anyway. Sean and I both have complete musical control. We write the music, we sing the music, and our bands play what we tell them to.”

“I know why bands only have one front man,” Bell said. “Two giant egos don’t fit on the same stage.”

Sean laughed.

“Sean doesn’t have a big ego,” Baby said. “But Henry’s is big enough for both of them.”

“Goddamn right,” I said, kissing Bell on the top of her cute little head.

“Are you doing research for your article? Is that why you’re asking?” Baby asked Bell.

“No. It’s done and sent off.”

“The version I saw?”

“Wait, what? You already wrote your article about the tour?” I asked.

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t I get to read it?”

“I didn’t either,” Sean said.

Bell shrugged.

“No, seriously,” I said. “What happened to the sharing thing?”

“I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Don’t worry Henry,” Baby said. “You’ll like it.”

****

The date in Austin was fantastic. I had no idea how relaxing the symphony could be. Not a single fan ran up to me screaming. No one asked me for my autograph. An old guy, who clearly had no idea who I was, shook my hand and told me how great it was to see young people at the symphony. I felt normal for the first time in years.

Bell looked amazing. She was wearing this tiny black dress she pulled out of one of her massive suitcases, and a pair of killer heels. Her beautiful dark hair was piled up on top of her head, little tendrils dripping down her neck. I watched her all through the performance. She was smiling and relaxed, happy. She took my breath away.

After the show we went to this fancy restaurant, ate appetizers and drank virgin mixed drinks. Bell laughed all night. I was completely caught up in her. It was confusing. I’d been with too many women to count. But I had never felt about any of them I way I felt about her.

I started to think about that relationship word. I knew Sean was right. I was already in a relationship with Bell. It was clear that I didn’t have a clue about how to do this. But despite that, Bell and I were making it happen.

It scared the shit out of me, the way I was so attached to her, the way I didn’t want anyone else. But as scared as I was about the way I felt, I was more scared to be without her.

“What are you thinking about over there?”

“You.”

She smiled. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah?”

“What are you thinking?”

“That you look amazing in that dress.”

“Thank you.”

“And how you’re going to look out of it later.”

“You are so bad, Hank.”

****

After the restaurant we went back to the hotel and had sex a few times before finally falling asleep. We woke up late and had all day until we had to be at the venue for the show. We stayed naked in bed. We were discussing ordering room service, when Bell ruined everything.

“The tour’s over in a week,” she said.

“Hmmm.” I smelled her hair.

“What are you going to do when we get back to Malibu?”

“Take some time off, relax, surf.” And with any luck have lots of sex with Bell. Which of course brought up the elephant in the room. “What about you?”

She propped herself up on her elbow and looked at me. “That’s just it. I have no home. No job. Well, I’m hoping that freelancing will take off, especially after the article is released. But I can do that from anywhere.” She paused and looked at me, serious now. “So I guess I just have to decide where to land.”

“The world is your oyster,” I said casually.

“What would you think if I stayed in Malibu for a while?”

“I would like that,” I said, without hesitation.

But it was more complicated than that. Where would she stay, with me? I hadn’t lived with another person since I left my foster family’s house at 19. I’d been on my own for almost 20 years. This thing with Bell was already pushing all of my boundaries. How much more could I take?

“I was hoping you would say that.” She snuggled closer. “Hank, can we talk about the relationship thing now?”

“Okay.” I was nervous as hell.

“I know how I feel about you. And I think I know how you feel about me.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, you’re pretty easy to read. And sometimes you say things that give you away.”

Oh shit. My whole body was in fight or flight mode. I didn’t speak.

She gazed into my eyes for a long moment, as if she were deciding something. Then she said. “I’m in love with you, Hank.”

Without any conscious thought on my part, I leapt out of the bed.

“Shit,” she said softly. She rolled over and covered her eyes with her arm.

I started pulling on my clothes. I was breathing hard, trying to regain control. I needed to calm down. I forced myself to stop my movements. I looked at her. She looked so sad, so hurt. Her eyes were hidden beneath her arm. Her body was completely still.

I sat down on the bed and leaned toward her. “I’m sorry. Let’s talk.”

“It’s too late,” she said, her voice hoarse and weak.

“No I mean it. Let’s talk about our… relationship.” I put my hand on her arm, but she jerked away.

“There’s nothing to talk about anymore. Just go. I know you want to.”

“No. I don’t want to go.”

She stayed perfectly still.

“I freaked out for a second. But I’m okay now. Let’s talk.”

She moved her arm and looked at me. I thought this was good. I was making progress.

“Hank, there was only one answer to what I said. And you didn’t say it.”

“Bell.”

“I was wrong. I was stupid. I’ve never… it’s never been like this for me before. And I never told someone I loved them first. I was always just responding to someone else. Lying really. But you wouldn’t lie to me.”

I couldn’t answer.

“So here I was, finally feeling like… like it was working the way it was supposed to. So certain that I knew how you felt. I’m a fool.”

“Bell.”

“Go Henry.”

I stayed where I was.

“Go!”

I left.