One Night In Amsterdam (19 page)

“Why can’t you?”

“Too much on my mind I guess.” I said, without admitting the real reason. How my horrible past always hunted me down in my dreams and never left me alone. The only time I was able to sleep peacefully was the night she was in my arms in Amsterdam.

She unlocked her door and was about to step inside when she turned back and brushed her lips softly on mine. “Good night Dylan. Try to empty your mind tonight.” She said, obviously ending the night.

I probably looked so hopeless and pensive that she turned back again. “Christmas Eve. I wonder…” She mumbled but then shook her head “Oh… never mind. You probably already have plans.”

“Come on, Emma. What were you going to say?”

“I was going to ask if you’d like to join us for dinner on Christmas Eve. Sydney, my aunt and uncle, and maybe my brother Steve will be there. Unless you had plans with your family, of course.”

“I’d love to.” I managed to say. My voice cracked in astonishment. She wanted me to meet her family. I couldn’t hide my enthusiasm. My face probably glowed with the excitement burning in me.

“Alright then, see you in three days …” She said, put a chaste kiss on my lips and closed the door.

On the day of Christmas Eve, in the late afternoon, I walked towards the house where Emma grew up, only a few blocks away from my apartment. I felt more nervous than I’d ever been in my life before. I was going to meet the family of the girl I loved and didn’t know what to expect.

I rang the doorbell once and waited at the door, taking deep breaths to calm myself. A beautiful middle age lady with short blonde hair, dressed in a black pencil skirt and white shirt opened the door quickly. I could immediately see the resemblance. Sydney looked just like her mother.

“You must be the famous Dylan,” she said with a big smile and invited me in. “I am so happy to finally meet you. We have been looking forward to it. I’m Helen. Emma’s aunt.”

“Nice to meet you, Mrs. Watson. I am very happy and honored to be here today.”

“Oh please, call me Helen.” She said and laughed. “You are as handsome and charming as I’ve been told.”

I blushed as I stepped inside and could feel my cheeks burning. I then saw Sydney, pointing towards Emma, holding a drink in her hand.  “Welcome Dylan. It was me of course, telling everyone all about you. They couldn’t get a word out of my secretive cousin… Ms. ‘I don’t’ want to talk about it’ over there.” Soon, a tall, grey haired man dressed in a colorful Christmas sweater joined the conversation.

“Oh, here is the man, the one sweeping our doctor off her feet. Nice to meet you, young fellow.” He said and extended his hand.

“Nice to meet you too. Mr. Watson.” I replied.

“You make us sound too old Dylan… Calling us Mrs. Watson, Mr. Watson. It’s George and Helen. Alright?”

“Okay, George.” I nodded and said hesitatingly.

“Now, tell us how you convinced our stubborn doctor Emma to be your girlfriend.”

“Soon to be a doctor.” Emma corrected him grinning. “George, Helen, and of course you too Sydney, please give him a break. He just got here. I am sure you will have your chance to interrogate him later, but let’s get him a drink first.” She winked.

“So, Dylan, what would you like? Wine, Beer, Scotch… or Eggnog maybe?” Helen asked.

“I am not so fond of eggnog. I’d go with red wine if you have a bottle open already. Otherwise, I can have a beer.”

“Anything for our special guest…” Helen said, holding a glass of red wine in her hand. “Pinot Noir okay for you? We can open a Merlot or Cabernet if you prefer.  You can also check the cellar yourself to find something you like.”

“Pinot Noir sounds good.” I said appreciative of her kindness.

“Here you go Dylan,” Sydney poured me a glass and under the curious gazes of everybody around me, I reached for it and took a sip.

“Come, sit by me and tell us everything.” Helen commented and then added, “Start with how you two met, what you do and where you work.”

I inhaled deeply. My eyes met Emma’s and she was smiling mischievously, as if she was telling me that I was in trouble and this interrogation would continue all night. But then, suddenly, she turned towards her aunt and said. “Come on auntie, I already told you all about it. We met during our Amsterdam city tour and then we found each other again by chance in New York.”

I nodded eagerly, agreeing to her condensed version of our story, and grateful that she skipped the uncomfortable and unpleasant details, like how I came out of a brothel, totally stoned.

While I sat next to Helen quietly, I felt the power of her inquisitive eyes on me and I was compelled to continue where Emma left off. I answered her rather easy questions. “I work in an investment business. I started my own company with a good friend of mine after college. It’s a hedge fund and asset management company called Phliant.”

“You own Phliant!” Both Helen and George exclaimed at the same time.

“Part owner.” I said without dwelling into more details. For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel like talking about my company nor how we started with almost nothing and turned it into a huge successful business.

Helen raised her eyes and was about make a comment when Sydney interrupted. “It’s time to eat. I don’t want to listen to the usual boring Wall Street talk and then eat cold turkey. Can we start?”

“Aren’t we going to wait for Steve?” I asked while I wondered what Helen was about the say. I was still curious about Helen’s and George’s earlier reaction.

“Unfortunately, my stubborn brother is still mad at me. He is not coming.” Emma answered. “As a last minute decision, he decided to spend this Christmas with my father. My dear father is in London with his girlfriend who Steve hates. So… he is spending the Christmas with him just to piss me off.” She sounded really upset.  I sensed, although she told me that she didn’t blame her father for leaving them, she was not very close with him either.

“I’m sure he will come around.” Helen said, trying to calm her down. “Now, let’s all go to the dining room and get started.” She ordered and led us to a big room where a festively prepared table, adorned with elegant place settings, poinsettias, tall candles and awesome smelling food was waiting for us.

“I will carve the turkey.” George said enthusiastically.

“I will bring the casserole.” Helen added.

The next three hours passed quickly as we ate the delicious food, all homemade by Aunt Helen.  We talked, laughed, drank wine and simply enjoyed ourselves. Emma’s family, or at least the ones I met, were as amazing as her. Although they were so different, I understood why Emma was so fond of Sydney. They were like sisters and it was obvious how much they loved each other. Indeed, it was so easy to see how everybody in her family was so fond of each other.   A pang of envy surrounded me and for the first time in maybe over twenty years, I wished I had a family like hers.  The only person I was close to in my family was Rachel and she was the only one I wished was here with me tonight.

Emma, obviously aware of my sudden reticence, asked. “Are you alright Dylan?” Her eyes were quizzical.

“Yes, I’m fine.” I answered succinctly.

“Why the pensive look then?”

“It’s just… I just wish Rachel could have been with us tonight.” I answered dejectedly. “She would have enjoyed being with you and your family as much as I have.”

“I’d love to meet your sister.” She replied. “Why don’t you invite her over, it’s not too late?”

“She is in Florence with her friends for the winter break but I definitely would like you to meet her when she comes back.” I said, and I really meant it. The two important girls in my life: Rachel, my quiet, timid sister and Emma, the love of my life. I wanted them to know each other. I just knew that they would connect right away.

After dinner, the night continued with Sydney playing Sinatra songs on the piano. George asked Helen to dance with him and despite Emma’s objections, he forced us to join them too. We flew to the moon and reached for the stars. We danced until we completely exhausted Sydney’s song repertoire. When we finally sat down by the fireplace to rest our feet, Sydney brought out her childhood favorite board game: ‘Hedbanz’. I was having so much fun that I felt like a little kid in a carnival. I didn’t want to leave but it was getting close to midnight and I knew Emma was going to work on Christmas day. I wished a Merry Christmas to Helen, George and Sydney and then I took Emma’s hand and asked her to follow me to the entrance of the house by the tall Christmas tree where I left my Chesterfield coat. I wanted to be alone with her for a few minutes before I left.

“You are not supposed to open it until morning but since I won’t get to see you tomorrow, I guess it would be okay to open it now.” I said, and took out the black Cartier box that I hid in my coat.

“Oh, Dylan, you shouldn’t have!” Emma shook her head with disbelief.

“Read the card first.” I said with a complacent grin.

She opened my card. I could see the gleam in her eyes and broadening smile on her face as she read it slowly. “I wish I could give you time and make the days longer, but I can’t. I hope you think of me every time you wear this watch.”

“Dylan, it’s beautiful, but it’s too much. I feel so bad. I was working all week and I couldn’t get you anything.”

“Nothing is too much for you Emma, and you gave me the greatest gift; this wonderful night. I don’t remember enjoying a family dinner this much. But then… any day, any night, any event with you is wonderful.”  I said and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

Just the touch of her lips was enough to start the fire in me. It was impossible to control myself and my insurmountable feelings when I was this close to her.  Slowly my lips trailed down her neck, I cupped her face with my hands and started kissing her more fiercely.  I grabbed her thin waist and pulled her to myself.  Lost in feelings, I broke away slowly and whispered in her ear. Almost imperceptible. “I love you”.

Her gaze lingered on my eyes a second too long before she looked away, probably contemplating her response.  Trying to look nonchalant, as if it wasn’t a big deal for me to say those words, I put on my coat avoiding her eyes. I reached for the door. I grabbed my umbrella and was about to leave. Then suddenly, Emma pulled my arm and made me stop. She turned me around swiftly and held the collar of my coat as she pulled me to herself unexpectedly. Her hands on my face, caressing gently my day-old stubble with her finger tips, she kissed me again. It was a long, tender kiss. Although my heart longed to hear her say those words back, her kiss felt like she was trying to show me what she couldn’t say in words. She loved me too.

During the days following that Christmas Eve, I could only see Emma a few minutes here and there. She was either working at the hospital or working on her dissertation and I, Dylan Hamilton, who couldn’t stand waiting, spent my days waiting for Emma to call. I cancelled my meetings and cleared my days just to spend a few precious minutes with her that I stole during her breaks. Even on New Year’s Eve, instead of partying with Max and guys from work as I would have done any other year, I spent the night at the hospital, chatting with nurses and Emma in between her patient visits. I managed to have a few minutes with her alone before midnight and I kissed her as the ball dropped and the clock showed twelve o’clock.

A new year… a promise of a new life for me. I wanted it to start with Emma in my arms, our lips sealed together, but I wanted more than a just a few hours that she could spare.  I was fighting with an invisible enemy that I had no chance of beating: time. Emma didn’t have time for me, for us, for our relationship. I understood it was her last year and she was about to graduate, become an MD and get her PhD at the same time. I couldn’t expect her to spend less time at the hospital or at the university, but I had to do something.

Being away from her and not seeing her enough was too hard to endure. Without her, my days were dull, my life boring and unpleasant. So, I thought about my options and discerned that there was only one way we could spend more time together… we should live together. There was only one problem…How would I convince her to say yes?

CHAPTER 15

EMMA

I was in the lab again, discussing with Amy how to remove the skin from the anterior thoracic wall on the supine cadaver. We were working on our dissection and identification exercise for hours, going over transverse incisions on soft tissues versus sagittal incisions. With more clinics and labs added to my schedule, it seemed like I was living on campus almost all the time. In the last month, I didn’t sleep at my house more than two days in row. Many nights, I either stayed at the university working on a lab assignment or I was at the hospital for my clinics. I was relieved a bit after my ER rotation was over but the hardest one, my surgical rotation, had just started and it was nothing like the others. Our attendings were more demanding, the hours were longer and since I was planning to specialize in neurosurgery, this rotation was far more important for me than any other. With my caffeine intake shooting through the roof, I was tired, exhausted and sleep deprived, but I wasn’t complaining. The operating room was where I wanted to be. I wanted to be a surgeon. Five months away from my degree, I was willing to do anything, even if it meant having to sacrifice living a normal life.