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BOOK: October song
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She wondered how he knew. “Our par ents aren’t fools, in case you think you can pull the wool over their eyes.”

“I ain’t callin’ anyone a fool.” His voice was tense. “Just keep quiet ‘bout this.”

“Well, if this is the life you’re choosing, I suggest you keep your car very well hidden. ‘Cause sooner or later you’ll get caught.”

“How can ya know that?”

She watched him closely. A nervous twitch in his cheek revealed his uncer tainty. Hehadn’tmade the choice to go fancy. Not yet anyway. “What about your baptismal vow, your promise to God and the church?”

“You should talk!” He leaned both hands on her window, looking down and shaking his head.

“Ben… listen. The Amish life is all you know.”

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“There’s much more to this,” he barked. She eyed him, praying silently for wisdom. “I think we should spend some time together . . it’s been ever so long.” This was risky for him, she knew, but so was traipsing round with Jezebel. “Come over and have lunch with me,” she pleaded.

“Atyourplace?”

She gave him quick directions. “Drop by

tomorrow. . anytime, really.”

He didn’t say he would or wouldn’t, just

turned on his heels and left.

On the drive home from the bank, the sky was a drab gray-white, not a speck of color. The air was still, not a trace of wind. The overall mood of the day reflected her inner struggle. ‘Course, Katie had no right to admonish her brother, older than herself by nearly two years. Yet, shedidhave something to offer, far more priceless than mere good advice.

The road sloped gently down toward Hickory Hollow, toward the wooded area where she and her brothers Eli and Benjamin, and sometimes their eldest brother, Elam, had often played hidey-go-seek in summer, chased after chipmunks in autumn, and followed each other’s footprints

in the snow during wintertime. Where the pond met both the woods and the wagon roads, out behind the two-story bank barn, there was a special place-“a world set apart.” It was the only spot to row a boat, “to drift away the cares of the day,” Mary Stoltzfus sometimes liked to say, a watering hole where all three brothers — sometimes Dat, too picked up their long willow sticks and went fishing of a morning.

The whole of the village, it seemed, was beset with memories. Too many to count. She passed up making the turn toward the hollow, instead heading away from the Plain village, driving toward the cozy house she and Daniel called home. Another day she’d drop in on Mary with the frozen vegetable soup. Not this day. This gray and miserable day.

Thinking again of Benjamin and the possibility of his visit, she prayed,Lord, may it be so. Tomorrow

At supper Katie mentioned to Clan having run into Benjamin at the bank. “Sad to say, but he’s flirting with the world.” She described Ben’s ultracontemporary getup and hairstyle, his heavily made-up girlfriend, his own brash attitude.

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Clan listened, not as quick to judge. “Sounds like the Lord is at work, you running into him like that.” He paused, smiling. “Don’t forget, we’ve been praying for our families. This may be the beginning of something.”

Hearing her husband talk this way gave her even more hope. “If Ben drops by tomorrow, I’ll share the love of the Lord Jesus with him. For sure and for certain.”

Clan was in agreement and promised to be in prayer for her. They continued to eat, but Katie felt tense. She wanted to bring up her and Mam’s phone conversation just now, but she let a few more moments pass.

Then, breathing deeply, she forged ahead. “Mam tells me that Dat wouldn’t mind if I came by the house for a short visit sometime.” She chose her words carefully so as not to hurt him, though she doubted he could be further pained by Samuel Lapp excluding him from a casual visit. Not with Dan’s own parents having severely rejected him and still standing their ground. “I thought it best we talk it over,” she said.

Dan’s eyes were suddenly bright. “If the door’s truly open, why not go?”

Well, the door sure seemed to be open. “Can we pray about it?” she asked.

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He reached for her hand and held it in both of his. “You seem a bit hesitant.” His eyes searched hers. “Are you all right, Katie?”

“I just want to do the right thing.” Truth be known, she welcomed the chance to visit. More than anything, she wanted to be a witness of God’s saving grace to both her parents. All the family, really.

“I don’t view the invitation as a negative thing. Not at all.” Clan was attentive, his face more serious now as they ate their dessert at the small square table next to the kitchen window. “You decide. It’s completely up to you.”

He didn’t seem a bit put off, and she was relieved. “I only wish Mam had includedyou …that they respected our marriage that much,” she said.

He smiled tenderly, stroking her hand. “If you choose to go, make whatever connection you can for the glory of God. Don’t worry about me.”

She fought back tears. “Could be the first step to uniting our families.”

“The matter is in God’s hands,” Clan said with confidence.

Where it belongs,she thought.

When noontime came the next day, and

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no sign of Benjamin, she set the table for herself, ate a bowl of vegetable soup and a toasted cheese sandwich, then, drawing hot water into the sink, she washed the single bowl, the utensils, and her water glass. Thinking that today, being the sky blue sunny day it was, she might venture over to Hickory Hollow, at least stop in and deliver the frozen soup to Mary. Maybe wait another day to visit Mam and Dat-she just didn’t know.

Having packed up the frozen chunk of soup, she placed the cardboard box on the kitchen table and hurried out to the utility room, where she took down a woolen sweater from a wooden peg and slipped her arms into its sleeves.

She drove past the woodland area near her parents’ farmhouse, not permitting herself to dwell on the former days of childhood play. Not even turning once to glance at the red sandstone farmhouse coming up on the right. Today she would keep her thoughts in check. She had a purpose, a mission to accomplish. She was here, in the hollow, on an errand of mercy. When she dropped off the homemade soup, she would offer only a cheerful smile. “How’re you doing, Mary? ‘S’nice to see you again.” That sort of thing. Having not

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seen her friend for a full year now, the last thing Katie wanted to do was burden dear Mary.

Once she had all that worked out in her mind, things didn’t seem so bleak as yes terday. ‘Course,thisday being what it was, all sunny and warm skies blue as the blue of the ocean at the horizon line — her spirits were lifted.

Katie knocked on the back door, and when Mary came she stood in the window momentarily before opening the door. “Katie it’s you,” she said, eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and joy.

“So good to see you, Mary.” She held the cardboard box, staring down at it. “I made more vegetable soup than we can hope to eat thought you and your family might enjoy some.”

Mary’s mouth dropped open. She eyed Katie’s parcel and stepped aside. “Come in, won’tcha?” Mary beckoned.

Due to shunning practices, Katie knew better than to hand the soup directly to Mary, from her hands to a member in good standing in the Amish church. Just wasn’t done. She went no farther than the utility room and set the box down on a shelf in the small outer room.

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“Denki — thank you,” Mary said of the soup.

“Hope you enjoy it.”

“I’m sure we will.” Mary didn’t seem to know what to do with her hands. First, she folded them, then put them behind her back, swaying like a shy schoolgirl.

The house seemed awfully quiet. Was the bishop home or not? Katie wondered.

Mary must’re sensed her concern. Quickly, she explained that John was out delivering shoes for horses to several

farmers at the north end of the hollow. “How’s everybody?” Katie asked.

“Oh, we’re fine,” Mary said. “Can ya stay?”

“Only a minute.” Katie struggled with the reality of the situation.

“How are you and Clan?” asked Mary. “We’re fine . . thanks for asking.” Katie went on to inquire about the children, and Mary’s response was short and to the point. The children were in good health, it seemed, and the chores were attended to daily, as well as plenty of book learnin’ going on under the bishop’s roof. But looking at her dear friend, Katie was a bit worried. The light was gone from Mary’s eyes, the cheery-cheeked complexion sadly absent. “How

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are you,really?“Katie pressed.

Mary was silent for a moment. Then, slowly ever so slowly, it happened. The former bond of friendship took over, and they began to talk softly, best friends kept apart by a society’s rules and regulations. “I have good days and bad … like everyone

else, I ‘spect,” Mary admitted.

“Well, you aren’t sick, I hope.”

Mary’s lip quivered. “Just a bit wore out, that’s all.”

“I didn’t come to cause you pain. You must know that.”

“No… no… it was right thoughtful of you to come, Katie.”

“I wish there was more I could do. You

surely have your hands full . my dear

friend.”

Mary smiled through her tears. “Your mam offered to help. And the older children Hickory John and Nancyare gut ‘bout helping when they’re home.”

They talked a blue streak. But they were cautious, even wise, steering clear of the differences in their beliefs . . doctrines, too. Meanwhile, the vegetable soup was starting to thaw.“Is’pose we could chew the fat all day, jah?” Mary said, hurrying to put away the soup.

From where she stood, Katie could see

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into the kitchen, the long table stretching out under the windows on one side, a gas lamp hanging overhead, and the wood stove opposite the table and benches. Same layout as Mamma’s. “I best be going,” she said.

“Wish you could stay . . wish we could ” Mary’s voice trailed off, and she leaned hard against the wall.

“You sure you’re all right?” Katie asked before leaving. “You just look so tired.”

“Oh, I’m fine,” Mary said, though Katie wasn’t convinced. There were dark circles under Mary’s eyes, prob’ly from lack of sleep or from pushing herself much too hard. Maybe both.

Mary thanked her repeatedly for such a “wonderful-gut deed.”

Just as Katie was turning to go, Mary said that one of the elders had spotted a red car parked out behind the Miller’s house, “over on the west side of the hollow.”

She listened, a bit surprised that Mary would bring up such a topic, especially

considering Katie’s status among the

People. But she volunteered nothing.

“The car’s parked over at Peter and Lydia Miller’s place of a night.”

The homestead belonged to her

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mother’s second cousins churchgoing Mennonites. “Ben’s in need of prayer,” Katie said, fumbling for the right words.

“I’m afraid he’s got one foot in the world and one in the church.., ownin’ a car and all. Next thing the car will ownhim.”

Katie sighed. This was terribly awkward. “Ben’s searching, that’s whatIthink.”

“But all your brother needs is right here with the People,” Mary spoke her mind.

Amish ways had been well ingrained in Katie, yet her heart had longed for more than man-made rules and traditions could offer. She’d best be careful what she said

now.

“Surely you haven’t gone and influenced Ben … away from the church, I mean.”

Katie let it be known she’d had nothing to do with Ben’s disobedience. And with that, she opened the door to go.

“Ach … I’m awful sorry, Katie. Truly, I am.” Mary reached out her hand. “Didn’t mean to cast blame on ya.”

Katie gripped her friend’s hand.

“You are so kind to come.” Mary snif fled.

She wished she could open her heart and reveal to Mary that shedidhope to influ ence Benjamin someday, for the Lord.

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Mary too. In fact, Katie prayed daily that she might lead each and every one of the People to Jesus, just as the Wise Woman had led her.

As tempted as Katie was to stare at the long lane leading to Dat and Mam’s house, she kept going, past the old stone house where she’d grown up. Where Samuel and Rebecca Lapp had brought her home as a newborn infant to be their adopted daughter. She even nixed the urge to glimpse the Millers’ barnyard, where Ben’s shiny sports car was said to be hiding.

She drove without stopping, all the way out to the intersection that ultimately led her to the clapboard house. Past the wide meadows and the creek running through it, where she made her home with Clan. As she drove, she prayed for Mary. “Provide for her every need, dear Lord, spirit, mind, and body.” Oh, how she longed to have a spiritual connection with her lifelong friend. Sharing the Lord brought people together in a way like no other. Surely God, in His sovereign plan, wouldn’t allow them to grow up together only to drift apart as young adults. And right around the time when one, or both of them, might become expectant mothers. In fact, she

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had a feeling Mary was already expecting her first baby-hers and John’s. Was that the reason for her friend’s fatigue?

Thinking back on the visit, she recalled that Mary had offered her nothing to eat or drink. Not even a glass of water. Just as well. The bishop’s wife was abiding by the rules of the shunning. Katie couldn’t find fault in that.

The car parked in the driveway took Katie off guard, but only for a moment as she pulled in, then turned off the ignition. Getting out, she noticed Benjamin perched on the gazebo steps in the side yard.

“Have you been here long?” she asked, walking toward him.

“A quarter hour or so.”

She had hoped he might come earlier, for lunch, but seeing him now was enough to make her smile. “Come in, come in,” she said, hurrying around to the back door.

They sat together in the kitchen, occasionally looking out over the pastureland from the window, two cups of coffee and a plate of sticky buns between them. “Don’t know why I’m here, really,” he confessed between bites.

She nodded at him, this brother of hers, who looked so peculiar in his polished

BOOK: October song
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