Not Second Best (7 page)

“I was patient all day.”

“All day?” Her fingers raised trails of goose bumps as she dipped into the hollow of his collarbone.

“Since Saturday, even.”

“Really?”

“I was here Saturday night, and then you got me all wound up with no place to go this afternoon.”

“I’m cruel that way.” She placed a kiss on his shoulder. “But you know, you could have had me all weekend and you decided to stand me up.”

“So this is punishment?”

“Mmm, no, just teasing.” She smiled, peering up at him through her eyelashes. “The waiting hurts me as much as it hurts you.”

“Then let’s end both our pain.” He scooped her off the floor and carried her up the three steps and down the hall.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing?”

“Ending your pain.” He leaned into the first room.

“This is my home office. Unless you need me to draw up a contract—”

Brett swung around and looked at the next room.

“Bathroom,” Tessa said.

He growled. “You could just tell me which door it is.”

“You never asked.”

Brett stopped in the middle of the hall and glared at her. Then he lowered himself to his knees and laid her on the floor.

“What are you doing?” she asked. He hadn’t dumped her on her feet, but why was he laying her on the floor in the hall?

“I just remembered that I don’t need a bed.” He pulled her t-shirt over her head.

“What if I do?” Tessa tried to be casual about smoothing down her hair. It crackled, betraying her.

“I’ll make it up to you.” Brett bent over her, kissing her belly as he opened her jeans. “Just for the record, I liked the skirt today. You know, without the pantyhose.”

Tessa arched. The pulse of his tongue across her skin matched the electric snap of her hair. “I’ll make a note.”

He straightened, reaching into his back pocket. “You want to do the honors? You looked great today.”

“Thanks.” She put the foil between her teeth and ripped it open.

He pulled her jeans off. “You look great now, too.”

“Naked?” Tessa swallowed. That first weekend she hadn’t thought much about her body. What did it matter? It was a weekend fling. Who cared if she jiggled in some places and sagged in others? She wasn’t eighteen anymore. But all Brett’s recent girls were young, or were close, and the light in the hall was good enough he could see every imperfection.

“Hell, yeah. You”—he kissed her calf—“are a fine”—he kissed her hip— “looking woman.” He took her nipple between his lips.

Tessa stroked her hands across his back, blinking back tears. He was only saying that because she was available. Right now with her naked under him and holding an open condom, he was not going to say
you’re an old hag, but I’ll take you
. Tomorrow he might start wondering what he was even doing chasing after her. He didn’t need her anymore. He had his dream producer and the contracts were signed. All was right in his world. He could go back to the hot little things he normally fucked.

Shifting to her mouth, he kissed her with a satisfied sigh. “I have been thinking about you all afternoon. Dreaming about the sounds you make.” He got himself up on his knees so she could get the condom on. “You probably didn’t think of me at all. You were probably thinking about lawyer stuff. Rights and contracts and fun shit like that.”

“Yes, I was. All afternoon.” After she fixed the condom on, she stroked his length. “Copyright law is a huge turn on for me.”

“I bet it is. You gonna let me in, or do you wanna keep playing with me?”

Gaze locked on his, she stroked him again.

He caught her hand and lifted it over her head. “You know, I had all afternoon with Rosy Palm. If that’s what I wanted, I could have had it.” He slid into her. “This is what I wanted. Oh Jesus, woman. You really are fine.”

“Thank you.” The weight of his body pinned her to the floor. She gasped.

Brett opened his mouth over her ear, pouring heat into her. She clung to him, helpless in his riptide. The sweet thrill being with him tore at her. Cracked her open like an oyster. The desire to let him in, let him have her whole, almost swamped her.

But he wanted Suzi. Bright, pretty little Suzi who was what every man wanted. Sweet, innocent.

Young.

“Tessa,” Brett groaned.

She arched her hips, trying to meet his thrust, but the momentum was gone. So she faked it. She made the right noises and clenched the right muscles and made him believe she was satisfied. It wasn’t his fault she wasn’t. It was her own. She’d tried to pretend she could just continue as she had been. Having fun like a kid—with a kid. The boundary she really needed to set was a wall. With him on the other side.

Brett rested his head on her sweaty breast, catching his breath, and she ruffled his hair with her fingers. The only fair thing to do was end this. He was going to be gone recording for who knew how long with Jason. As much as six months. In that time, this little non-relationship would die a time-honored rock and roll death by distance.

Brett rolled over and groped for her. Nothing. He opened one eye. Too early. Last night they had been all over this house, and he had the rug burns to prove it. She’d allowed him to stay the night, and he hadn’t stupidly left, which was a major victory. They’d lain in bed like a fucking married couple watching TV, which was on a timer and shut off on him about midnight. Didn’t matter. He’d just been using the glow to watch Tessa sleep. When the TV went off, he’d curled up around her. Normally, he didn’t fall asleep before four and woke up half a dozen times before he gave up and got out of bed at noon. Last night he’d slept straight through from the time he’d cuddled her close until she’d dropped something in the bathroom and swore.

“Tessa?” he called.

“Go back to sleep,” she said.

He climbed out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom where she was putting on makeup. She was wearing a tan skirt and a yellow top that made her hot and cool and completely in control at the same time. “Mornin’ baby.” He wrapped his arms around her waist.

“G’morning.” She kissed his cheek and turned back to applying mascara.

“This is nice.”

“What’s nice?” She made that weird face women make when they’re putting on mascara, and on her, it didn’t look stupid.

“Waking up together.” He nuzzled her neck. She still smelled faintly of sex and sweat.

“It would be better if I wasn’t running late.”

That had to be good, didn’t it? She hadn’t wanted to get out of bed with him. “You want me to get you some breakfast? I can cook.”

“I don’t. There’s nothing to cook. I’ll just run through Starbucks and grab coffee.” She screwed the mascara wand back into its bottle and tossed it into a basket beside the mirror.

Brett teased his fingers under the hem of her skirt. “How late are you?”

“Too late for that.”

“So, be late.” He kissed the curve of her jaw right where it ran under her earlobe.

“No.” She slipped away from him.

“I’ll take a rain check for tonight then.” He followed her to the bedroom and watched her step into a pair of boring brown pumps. She worked boring brown pumps better than most chicks worked stilettos.

“I can’t tonight. I have plans.”

“All night?”

“Until late.” Picking up a jacket that matched her skirt, she slipped it on. “Lock up when you leave.”

Something ugly and hard formed in his stomach. “Well, what about tomorrow?”

“I don’t know. I’ll have to call you.” At the top of the stairs, she scooped up a briefcase and her purse and kissed his cheek. “Don’t forget to lock up when you leave.”

“Yeah,” he said to the closing door. It was like being patted on the head.

His shirt was on the dining room floor, and his jeans were still in the hall with his underwear. She had a nice house. Comfortable, except for the living room and dining room she never used. The bathroom off her bedroom had blue and green tiles staggered across the wall and a shower curtain with palm trees printed on it. He stood under the water, trying to banish the uneasy sensation she’d left him with.

She’d left him alone in her house but had kissed him on the cheek on her way out.

She’d let him stay the night last night.

But she’d rushed out the door this morning.

Yesterday, she’d screwed him in every square inch of her house.

But… Shit.

He turned off the water and toweled himself dry then dressed in yesterday’s clothes and walked around the house. On the dresser and bedroom walls, she had a few family pictures, all recent. Her sisters and mother, her brother and sister-in-law, her nephews and nieces. Her sisters and brother all had kids, and she had none. Why?

He supposed the answer to that was in the pictures hanging in the living room. She had snaps of herself with some major players. Rock stars, movie stars, athletes. And then there was the framed portrait of her graduation. While her sisters had been settling down and having families, Tessa had been getting a law degree and running with the big dogs.

He loaded their plates into the dishwasher and threw out the leftovers. In the bedroom, he made the bed and checked to see if he’d left anything behind. How could he have? He hadn’t brought anything with him. On a walk through the rest of the house, he fixed the couch cushions in her downstairs rec room. The room she really lived in. Deep, soft couch, big TV. Everything lush and comfortable and relaxing.

Shooting a glare at the big blue velvety couch where they had made love last night before going to bed, Brett reached into his pocket for his car keys. When had he become such a pussy? Moping around like she’d broken up with him. She was late for work. They’d had too much fun last night and she’d overslept. The fact she wouldn’t call off work or cancel her plans for him didn’t mean anything.

He left by the front door and checked to make sure it was locked. Recording didn’t start for a week yet. He’d see her before then. While he was recording, he’d have time to get tight with her brother and sister-in-law, provided he could keep a leash on his bandmates. That would give him another edge with her. Everything was going according to plan.

If that was the case, why was he standing outside her house, holding on to her locked doorknob, wishing he could get back in?

* * * *

Tessa put her head down on her desk. She’d had insomnia since Brett left for WVA three weeks ago. Make that four. She hadn’t slept for a week before he left either. A solid month of lying awake, remembering what it felt like to snuggle up to him. Every evening she’d walked into the house and remembered what it was like to come home and find he’d tidied up before he’d left. She’d dodged two of every three times he called. Death by distance wasn’t happening. He seemed happy with the idea she was just a really busy person.

Really busy going to the gym to swim in the pool every night because it gave her a good reason to not have her phone on her. All her friends thought she’d just started a New Year’s resolution at a really odd time. Except Candy, who thought she was trying to tone up while her much younger playmate was out of town. Now she had a whole weekend to fill in front of her. Made her wish the guys were gearing up for a tour because she would have a lot more work to do then.

“Hi, you okay?”

Tessa pulled herself together as she stood up to greet her visitor. “Brian, you’re home! How was the honeymoon?” She rounded her desk and hugged him, wondering why she didn’t feel any loss at the fact that he was married, tanned, and happy.

“Great. The kids had a blast.”

“I can’t believe Suzi let you take the kids on your honeymoon.” Tessa stepped back and surveyed him. He didn’t look anxious anymore. For about the past decade, worry had lurked at the corners of his eyes. He had covered it pretty well, but now that it was gone, she realized how bad it had been.

“She wouldn’t go without them.”

“That’s good.” She took his hand. “Come sit down.”

“I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Oh?” She settled on the end of the couch in front of the windows so he could sit at the other end. “What about?”

“I’m thinking about getting the custody arrangement changed.”

Tessa leaned her head on her hand. “That’s not my area of expertise. I really can’t advise you.”

“I know, but you know all the players. I just want to go into this with my eyes open for once.”

“What is it you want?”

Brian leaned forward and tapped the couch cushion as if he needed to argue his point with her. “I want to have the kids with me more. Suzi and I have talked about it, and she’s all for it. The only reason I’ve let them stay with Bonnie is because I had to travel so much, and I couldn’t leave them alone or jerk them around based on my schedule. But now with Suzi, they wouldn’t have to. They could stay with us, and she’d be there all the time.”

“And she really understands what she’d be getting into? Instant family at twenty-five.”

“Yeah, she does. And I’m not going anywhere for months anyway. We don’t start work on the next album for five more months so we won’t be on tour for over a year.”

“It could take that long to hammer out the new agreement. Remember what Bonnie was like during the divorce?”

“But that was years ago.”

“And has she changed at all?”

Brian made a face.

“Plus now she’s jealous because you’re remarried and she’s still single.” Tessa put her wrist to her forehead and whipped up her most melodramatic tone. “And she wasted the best years of her life on you.”

Brian grabbed her hand off her head, laughing. “Cut it out.”

Tessa laughed with him, amazed at how easy it was. He was a friend. An old friend who was happy for the first time in a long time.

“So what do you think my chances are?”

Tessa glanced down. He hadn’t released her hand, but the way he cradled it was more about keeping her focus on the conversation, not about an insatiable need to touch her. Not anymore. Not with Suzi at home. “You know what she wants is the child support, not the kids. At least that’s what I read from my dealings with her over the past however many years.”