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Authors: Ann Redisch Stampler

Tags: #Juvenile Fiction, #Social Themes, #Physical & Emotional Abuse, #Dating & Relationships, #Thrillers & Suspense

How to Disappear (32 page)

BOOK: How to Disappear
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He keeps telling me he’s going to reform. He’s going to be a stand-up guy I can count on.

I tell him he has nothing to reform from. He’s the most stand-up guy I’ve ever met. Plus, I already count on him.

He doesn’t buy it.

Jack judges himself so hard.

As for me not having self-control: wrong. I’ll never tell him what actually happened. Him or anyone else.

What good would it do? Alex would still be dead, and Jack would still have gunshot residue all over him. He’d just hate himself that much more.

Plus, he’d leave me.

When I told him how Connie Marino ended up dead by Green Lake (what I did, what I shouldn’t have done, what I knew I shouldn’t have done but did anyway), he said the right words.
Not your fault. There, there. So not your fault.

But his eyes.

Different story.

The way he saw me. The way there was an
anyway
in the middle of his liking me. He liked me
anyway
.

This time he wouldn’t like me.

I swear to God, if I could think of some way I could tell him and not crush him and not lose him, I’d do it. This guy
so
deserves not to suffer.

But it beats being dead.

I saved him.

I saved his life. I got rid of the asshat who tried to make him kill me and threatened his mother and would have killed him, too.

But he’d still blame me. And he’d blame himself worse. If he knew.

He’ll never know.

I saved us.

Ask me if I’m sorry.

Or not.

You know the answer.

Acknowledgments

First, thanks to my agent, Brenda Bowen, without whom this book (not to mention my life as a novelist) would not exist.

The team at Simon Pulse has been stellar. Thanks to editors Patrick Price, who acquired
How to Disappear
; Sara Sargent, who inherited it, but embraced, nurtured, and shaped it as her own; and Sarah McCabe, who has run with it, energetically and brilliantly, toward release. Thanks also to Mara Anastas, Jodie Hockensmith, Carolyn Swerdloff, Tara Grieco, Mary Marotta, Lucille Rettino, Kayley Hoffman, Sara Berko, Michael Rosamilia, Michelle Leo and her team, my sales rep Kelly Stidham and the entire S&S sales force, and jacket artist Regina Flath.

As for the team at JKS—Marissa DeCuir, Chelsea Apple, Caroline Davidson, Jenna Smith, and Angelle Barbazon—magic!!!

To my primary beta reader, Rick, who goes through every word of every draft; to Laura, whose close reading and notes have been spectacular; and to Michael, who gets story structure so well it’s scary, more thanks than can fit in this space.

I am so fortunate to have Alexis O’Neill, Carolyn Arnold, Gretchen Woelfle, and Nina Kidd as my critique group, not only because of their expertise and their constant encouragement, but because it’s a pleasure to know them.

I came close to fan-girling when Sarah Aronson offered to trade manuscripts. Her strong, fresh perspective moved me forward when I was stuck. And having writers whose work I so admire—Carrie Mesrobian, Gretchen McNeil, and Martina Boone—take time from their own work and deadlines to blurb this book put me on the giddy side of grateful.

As for the generous and incisive April Henry, who started off as a blurber and ended up as a forensic expert/plot wrangler/editor/hand holder/and general thriller writer’s best friend and resource, thank you!

The experts who’ve helped me with this book have been extraordinary in the depth of their knowledge and their ability to convey it to a novice in their fields. Special thanks to Robin Burcell in equal measures for her forensic expertise and creativity, and to Jason Scott, whose insights into technology and privacy (or lack thereof) on electronic devices was indispensible. Any technical errors in this book are entirely my fault, not theirs.

Alethea Allarey has made it possible for me to hold my head up online, and Lissa Price has been my voice of sanity throughout this process. (And to the secret FB group that’s been so enlightening, helpful, and just generally wonderful . . . you know who you are, and thanks!)

Finally, thanks Mom!!! You started cheerleading for my writing when I could barely hold a pencil, and you’re still going strong.

ANN REDISCH STAMPLER
is the author of the young adult novels
Afterparty
and
Where It Began
as well as half a dozen picture books. Her work has garnered an Aesop accolade, the National Jewish Book Award, Sydney Taylor honors, the Middle East Book Award, and Bank Street Best Books of the Year mentions. She lives in Los Angeles, California, with her husband, Rick.

Simon Pulse

Simon & Schuster, New York

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simonandschuster.com/teen

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Also by

ANN REDISCH STAMPLER

Afterparty

Where It Began

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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are the product of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

SIMON PULSE
An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division | 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020 |
www.SimonandSchuster.com
| First Simon Pulse hardcover edition June 2016 | Text copyright © 2016 by Ann Redisch Stampler | All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. | SIMON PULSE, logo, and colophon are registered trademarks of Simon & Schuster, Inc. | For information about special discounts for bulk purchases, please contact Simon & Schuster Special Sales at 1-866-506-1949 or
[email protected]
. | The Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau can bring authors to your live event. For more information or to book an event contact the Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau at 1-866-248-3049 or visit our website at
www.simonspeakers.com
. | Designed by Gail Ghezzi | Jacket design by Regina Flath | Jacket photograph copyright © 2016 by Thinkstock | Author photograph by Sonya Sones | Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Name: Stampler, Ann Redisch, author. | Title: How to disappear / by Ann Stampler. | Description: First Simon Pulse hardcover edition. | New York : Simon Pulse, 2016. | Summary: “A sexy road trip thriller, told from alternate perspectives, following a girl on the run after witnessing or committing a murder and the boy who has been sent to kill her”—Provided by publisher. Identifiers: LCCN 2015027340  | ISBN 9781481443937 (hc) | ISBN 9781481443951 (ebook) | Subjects: | CYAC: Mystery and detective stories. | Love—Fiction. | Murder—Fiction. | Organized crime—Fiction. | BISAC: JUVENILE FICTION / Social Issues / Physical & Emotional Abuse (see also Social Issues / Sexual Abuse). | JUVENILE FICTION / Social Issues / Dating & Sex. | Classification: LCC PZ7.S78614 Ho 2016 | DDC [Fic]—dc23

CONTENTS

Prologue

Part 1

Chapter 1: Cat

Chapter 2: Jack

Chapter 3: Cat

Chapter 4: Jack

Chapter 5: Cat

Chapter 6: Jack

Chapter 7: Cat

Chapter 8: Jack

Chapter 9: Cat

Chapter 10: Jack

Chapter 11: Cat

Chapter 12: Jack

Chapter 13: Cat

Chapter 14: Jack

Chapter 15: Cat

Chapter 16: Jack

Part 2

Chapter 17: Jack

Chapter 18: Cat

Chapter 19: Jack

Chapter 20: Cat

Chapter 21: Jack

Chapter 22: Cat

Chapter 23: Jack

Chapter 24: Cat

Chapter 25: Jack

Chapter 26: Cat

Part 3

Chapter 27: Jack

Chapter 28: Cat

Chapter 29: Jack

Chapter 30: Cat

Chapter 31: Jack

Chapter 32: Cat

Chapter 33: Jack

Chapter 34: Cat

Chapter 35: Jack

Chapter 36: Cat

Chapter 37: Jack

Chapter 38: Cat

Chapter 39: Jack

Chapter 40: Cat

Chapter 41: Jack

Chapter 42: Cat

Chapter 43: Jack

Chapter 44: Cat

Chapter 45: Jack

Chapter 46: Cat

Chapter 47: Jack

Part 4

Chapter 48: Jack

Chapter 49: Cat

Chapter 50: Jack

Chapter 51: Cat

Chapter 52: Jack

Chapter 53: Cat

Chapter 54: Jack

Chapter 55: Cat

Chapter 56: Jack

Chapter 57: Nicolette

Chapter 58: Jack

Chapter 59: Nicolette

Chapter 60: Jack

Chapter 61: Nicolette

Chapter 62: Jack

Chapter 63: Nicolette

Chapter 64: Jack

Part 5

Chapter 65: Nicolette

Chapter 66: Jack

Chapter 67: Nicolette

Chapter 68: Jack

Chapter 69: Nicolette

Chapter 70: Jack

Chapter 71: Nicolette

Chapter 72: Jack

Chapter 73: Nicolette

Chapter 74: Jack

Chapter 75: Nicolette

Chapter 76: Jack

Chapter 77: Nicolette

Chapter 78: Jack

Chapter 79: Nicolette

Chapter 80: Jack

Chapter 81: Nicolette

Chapter 82: Jack

Chapter 83: Nicolette

Chapter 84: Jack

Chapter 85: Nicolette

Chapter 86: Jack

Chapter 87: Nicolette

Chapter 88: Jack

Chapter 89: Nicolette

Chapter 90: Jack

Jack Says

Nicolette Says

Acknowledgments

About Ann Redisch Stampler

BOOK: How to Disappear
5.84Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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