Finding Home (5 page)

With a deep sigh, she left the safety of the car and headed to the porch steps. Her mother would find something to say about today’s clothing choice as well. Andy had pulled on a tight pair of jeans and a knit top that was snug with a v cut in the bust line. Her worn boots were on her feet, and her hair was pulled into a high ponytail. She’d traded the big hoops for a pair of topaz gemstones. All in all, she looked like she felt, comfortable.

“Nice of you to decide to join us, Andrea,” her mother said from just inside the front door. Andy could see the condemnation in her eyes as her mother took her in from head to toe. “And you dressed for the occasion as well.”

“I dressed like I always do when I’m at home, mother. And this is my home, isn’t it?” Andy forced the smile to her lips.

Her mother didn’t utter a word, just held the door open for her. But the look on her face and in her eyes spoke loud and clear. Andy had no idea what she had ever done to make her mother feel the way that she did about her, but somewhere along the line, love and affection ceased to exist. She used to think “if only” or “what if” but those days were long behind her as well. She was who she was, and she was finally okay with that.

Just to irritate her mother some more, she leant in and gave her a smacking kiss on the cheek as she passed through the door. She thought she heard her mother sigh but wasn’t sure. She could see her father sitting through the doorway at the kitchen table and hurried to him.

“Hey, Daddy.” She bent low and gave him a warm and affectionate kiss on the cheek and a brief squeeze. “How are you feeling today?”

His cheeks were a little grey, and he looked like he was coming off a long night of drinking, but he smiled at her and reached up to stroke his fingers down her cheek. “I’m fine, Andy. I’m glad that you came home.”

“I’ll always be here when you need me, Daddy. You should know that,” Andy assured her father and ignored the snort from her mother as she entered the room.

“Sit down, Andrea, and please try not to scuff the floor with your choice of shoe ware.” That was her mother, all business.

“Yes ma’am.” Andy saluted and almost gasped when her father smacked her on the hand.

“Don’t sass your mother, young lady,” he informed her in his gruff voice, but there was a twinkle in his eye, as if he had missed these moments.

She grinned at him unrepentantly and took a seat next to him. Her mother brought two cups of coffee over to the table and sat down on the other side of her husband, across the table from Andy.

“We asked you to come home for a reason, Andrea. There are some things that we need to discuss with you and, with your father’s health, we thought that now would be the best time.” Claire was all business as she sat at the table, and Andy wondered if her mother ever showed emotion. And she wondered, not for the first time, just how her father could stay married to such a woman.

“What is going on with your health, Daddy?” Andy asked looking at him instead of her mother.

She startled when her mother reached across the table and took her father’s hand in hers, squeezing his fingers tight. But it was the look of love in her father’s eyes that threw Andy the most. There was no doubt in her mind that her father loved her mother just as much today as he must have when he married her.

Once again it was Claire who answered. “Your father has been diagnosed with stage three cancer. We’re fighting it, but it was pretty far gone before your father went to have it checked, and they aren’t very optimistic about it. He’s been taking radiation and will be starting a round of chemo next, but there are no guarantees that any of it will do any good.” Claire was matter of fact and if Andy hadn’t noticed the slight tremor in her mother’s hand she would have wondered if she even cared.

“Cancer?” was all that Andy could get out of her suddenly constricted throat.

“Breast cancer to be precise,” Claire continued. “But it has already spread to his bones at this point.”

“Breast cancer,” Andy felt like a parrot.

“Yes, men can develop breast cancer as well as women, but we didn’t realise that and never once thought that he was developing cancer.” Claire’s knuckles were white where she was gripping her coffee cup and for once, for the first time in a long time, Andy felt a rush of admiration for her mother.

“What can I do?” Andy looked at her father and didn’t even try to stop the tears that were flowing freely down her face.

“Be here,” was all he said but they both knew what he wasn’t saying. He wanted her here in case the worst happened and he didn’t make it.

“For as long as you need me, for as long as it takes,” Andy promised.

“Good,” Claire said and rose from the table, walking over to the sink before she continued talking. “There are things that we need you to take care of. The horses have always been your father’s life, and the only person that he trusts to see to them while he can’t is you.” Claire turned around and gave Andy another look from head to toe. “You’re certainly dressed for it.”

And just like that Andy was back to wishing her mother was anyone else other than the perfect Claire Ebans. She turned back to her father and took both of his hands in hers. “Of course I’ll take care of them Dad, but what about Leroy? Doesn’t he still work here?”

“Sure he does, Andy girl, but I need someone with my fire and blood out there. I need someone who loves the horses as much as I do. I need you to be my eyes, my ears, and my heart.” He brought her fingers to his face and held them close for a moment. The sadness and defeat in his eyes were almost more than Andy could take.

“I’ll do anything that I can, Daddy.” She promised once more. “Until you’re back on your feet again you can count on me.”

Claire dropped a cup in the sink, and Andy caught the lingering sadness in her father’s eyes as he stood and went to Claire. Andy stood from the table as well and headed to the back door on the other side of the kitchen.

 
“I’ll just go check on them now and maybe take a ride while I’m here,” she said to no one in particular as she slipped out the door. She needed to feel the wind in her face, needed to disappear for a few moments in time and pretend that her parents hadn’t just told her that her father was dying.

Chapter Four

Andy rode hard and fast, but this time she just couldn’t outrun the demons on her heels. Tears washed her face and the wind was cool as it dried them to her cheeks. Cancer. Never had a word possessed such power and conveyed such fear straight to her heart. And the fact that her father had breast cancer just floored her. She would have never thought that a man could get that. It just went to show how uneducated she was in some areas.

She finally shook her head and pulled back on the reins. She’d given her horse Sunfire his head and he’d taken off. She was glad that he was still in the barn, that her father had kept him and not sold him off. Sunfire had always been hers, rarely letting anyone else ride him. He just seemed to know how she felt and exactly how she wanted to fly on his back. She leant down and hugged him tight around the neck being careful of the pommel that dug into her side. She’d missed him.

She was close to the edge of her dad’s property, and it looked like whoever had bought the place next to it had been busy. She could see the roof of a very large house from where she rode the fence line. Plus there were several other buildings on the premises, and she had no idea what they held. But they looked new.

She was so lost in her perusal that she flinched when she heard the gallop of hooves and turned to see the rider approach from the other side. She wasn’t even surprised when she saw that it was Jackson. He’d said he was fifteen minutes away and that would be about right if taking the roads from one ranch to the other.

“So you live next door, huh?” she queried, though she was sure of the answer.

“Yes, for about a year and a half now. My brother and business partner live here as well.” He seemed to be checking her for ticks, his gaze was so intense.

“You all live together?” she asked. “I guess that would explain why the house looks so big.”

Jackson
laughed. “It’s huge. We all have our own areas but share the more common rooms like the kitchen, den and all that. Makes it nice for all of us.”

“I’m sure it does,” she replied thinking how that would give them privacy when they brought women home.

“You’ve been crying,” Jackson stated. “What happened, Andy?”

“Nothing,” she said automatically. She had no idea who knew about her father’s cancer, and she wasn’t sure that she could talk about it just yet.

“Not regretting last night, are you?” he asked with just a touch of nervousness.
 
Andy smiled and shook her head. “No. I enjoyed it as much as you did. I was sorry to see you rush off so soon.
 
Was I a little bit too much for you to handle?”

He laughed, but she could see the faint blush that stained his cheeks.
 
For some reason he had felt the urge to run.
 
Wasn’t that an interesting discovery.
 
She should be pissed, should ride away from him and not look back.
 
The last thing she needed in her life was another man to confuse her, no matter how much he excited her as well.
 
God, she needed help.
 
Her father might be dying and she was lusting after not one, but two men.

“No big deal,” she assured him instead.
 
“It turned out for the best.”

”Why is that?” he asked and sounded a little miffed that she didn’t mind his early departure. Men and their egos.
 
If she didn’t know better, she would swear that he and Jordan were related. Lord knew they were both full of themselves and their own importance.
 
They both walked away from her and yet still managed to show back up when she was thinking of other things.
 
Of course, what did that say for her taste in men?

“Well, it seems that my ex boyfriend followed me here,” she said wanting Jackson to know for some reason. “And he doesn’t plan to leave any time soon.”

“Want me to tell him otherwise?” Jackson asked her and there was a steel edge to his voice.

Though the thought of seeing the two go at it was indeed thrilling, she wouldn’t do that to either one of them. Jackson didn’t deserve it and though Jordan did, he would get his ass kicking from her. “No thanks, Jackson, but I appreciate the offer.”

“Is he the one that made you cry?” Jackson asked softly.

“No, not really,” she answered honestly. “He left me over a year ago and suddenly just turned back up in my life like no time had passed.” She sighed and looked off into the distance.
                                          

“And how do you feel about that?” he questioned her.

She smiled and laughed softly. “Confused, since he showed up just minutes after we had sex.”

“Ouch, not exactly good timing on his part,” Jackson smiled. “Want me to help you forget about him again?”

“I’d love nothing more than to forget about everything for a while,” she answered honestly.

“Follow me,” he told her and started off at a slow trot along the fence line. She kept pace easily and soon found herself at a gate that she didn’t remember being there before.

“When did this get here?” she asked as he reached down to open it from his side.

“Your dad and I decided to put it in when we started breeding our horses. My partner Cole is one of the best horse trainers around as well. So this gate just made sense to us all. We do a lot of work together now.” Jackson shut the gate behind her and then, before she could move away, he leant in and took her mouth in a hard kiss.

“What was that for?” she finally breathed out.

“Just because I wanted to,” he told her and then set off at a slow trot towards one of the buildings she had noticed.

“Where are we headed?” she asked.

“To get you relaxed,” he answered with a grin. “Nervous?”

“Never,” she answered tartly and grinned when he threw his head back and laughed.

“I like your style, Andy,” he assured her. “I like it a lot.”

“Why, thank you,” she replied.

She followed him until they came to a stop in front of one of the buildings. Up close, she could see that it was done in a Mexican stucco design. Seeing that most houses favoured the wooden ranch house frame that her parents’ lived in, this was a nice contrast.

He pulled the doors open for her, and she caught her breath at the oasis that was revealed. This particular building housed a huge indoor pool complete with a waterfall at one end.

“I hope that means you like it,” Jackson said. “I designed it, and Cole decided on the best building to house it in. My brother helped us find the best supplies and still keep costs within our budget.”
  

“It’s heaven,” she sighed as she tried to take it all in.

“Those doors to your right lead to changing rooms, both his and hers,” he pointed things out to her. “And to your left along that wall are several different massage rooms. When we open this up to the public there will be at least four masseuses here at all times during operating hours. Then the entire wall along the back behind the falls is a steam room, both his and hers and a universal room for everyone.”