Blood Blade Sisters Series (44 page)

Lucy looked away, clenching her jaw against the anguish burning its way up her throat. When she could speak without blubbering like a heartsick fool, she answered him, though she kept her gaze glued to the stage. “I have no intention of returning home just yet. I’ve never been to Charlotte. I should really make the most of my visit while I’m here.” Her eyes focused on Mr. Halford. “Besides, you aren’t the only dog on the prairie, Finnegan Taggart. If you don’t want me, there are other men who might.”

Mr. Halford caught her gaze and aimed a charming smile and bow in her direction before moving his attention back to his rapt audience. Lucy looked up at Finn, gratified to see he’d caught their exchange, and didn’t seem to be at all pleased about it. “Why shouldn’t I stick around and see what might come of it? There’s nothing for me in Boston.”

Finn grabbed her arm and pulled her to the side, away from any prying ears. “Lucy, Halford is not someone you should be getting involved with. You need to stay away from him.”

“Why, Finn? Tell me the real reason you don’t want me to see him.” Lucy held her breath, hoping and praying he’d just fess up and tell her he loved her and couldn’t stand to see her with another man.

Finn’s eyes drifted from hers down to her mouth, lingered. He leaned a fraction of an inch closer and Lucy held her breath. She wanted to press closer, close the distance between them. He wanted to kiss her again; she knew it. Could feel it in the sudden tension in him, the way his grip tightened slightly on her arm, the slight hitch in his breathing.

Then Finn glanced toward the stage. Lucy followed his gaze and saw Mr. Halford briefly frown between the two of them before plastering a grin back on his face. Finn let go of her arm.

“I can’t discuss it here. Suffice it to say, he’s not right for you.”

Lucy forced down the tears that threatened to erupt and straightened her backbone. “Well, by your own choice, my personal life is no longer any of your business. I’ll see whomever I wish to see. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

Lucy moved closer to the stage and watched the crowd as Mr. Halford spoke. There were a few faces, those belonging to the more affluent men, Lucy noted, who glowered menacingly at Mr. Halford as he spoke. But the majority of the crowd watched him with interest.

Lucy forced a smile to her face when Mr. Halford winked down at her. No matter what she wanted Finn to think, she’d never be able to replace him. Mr. Halford was handsome, powerful, rich, and well connected. Everything a girl should want. And Lucy didn’t feel even a spark of attraction to him.

Yet, if Finn had his way, she’d have to learn how to live without him. She didn’t know if she could. She’d managed to survive for the last several years by withdrawing into herself. Staying numb, detached. But one look at Finn had blown her carefully crafted facade to bits. It was as though her heart had finally begun beating again.

And with its reawakening came the pain shredding through it. If Finn had his way, that would be something she’d need to learn to live with as well. Because she couldn’t imagine it being whole without him.

Chapter Six

Lucy took a deep breath, enjoying the cool morning air before the heat of the late summer set in. The park across from the hotel was nearly empty this early in the morning and Lucy was happy to be able to wander unimpeded while she contemplated her predicament.

She’d been in Charlotte for two weeks now and she’d made no headway with Finn. The stubborn man still kept his distance from her, though she didn’t think he was as unaffected by her as he tried to pretend.

And a new complication was arising. Philip Halford. Since Lucy spent most of her time sticking as close to Finn as possible, and Finn was Philip’s right-hand man, she had been seeing a lot more of Philip than she’d expected. Philip, much to Lucy’s surprise, seemed delighted by her presence. Compared to Finn’s continued rejection of her, it was a bit of a balm to her spirit to have an attractive man seek her company, even if she did not return his interest.

Lucy meandered back to the hotel and was brought up short by the sight of Finn descending the steps toward a waiting carriage. He looked up and caught her gaze. For a moment, Lucy thought he’d continue on his way without a word to her, but instead, he came toward her.

Lucy watched him approach, her eyes drinking in every inch of him, the way his trousers hugged his legs, the snug fit of his vest and coat over his toned physique. She could very happily spend hours just watching him. He came to a stop in front of her and neither said anything for a moment.

Finally, Lucy nodded toward the carriage. “Are you going somewhere?”

Finn nodded. “Halford has a few tasks for me out of the city.”

Lucy tried not to show her disappointment. “How long will you be gone?”

“A week. Maybe two.”

“Oh.” She looked down at the grass beneath her feet. Lucy didn’t want him to go. She’d only just found him and the thought of him being away sent a rush of panic through her that she had a hard time controlling.

“Lucy, I—”

“Taggart?” Lucy and Finn looked toward the hotel to see Philip standing beside the carriage. When he caught sight of them, he hurried over. “There you are, man. You always seem to be disappearing on me. Quite annoying, I must say,” Philip said with a good-natured laugh.

Lucy knew how he felt, though she didn’t feel particularly jovial about it.

“I was just saying good-bye to my cousin.”

“Ah yes,” Philip said, turning his attention to Lucy. “The charming Miss Taggart. Well, never you fear. Finnegan will return shortly. In the meantime, I’d be delighted to help take charge of you. In fact, I’m attending a small musical soiree this evening. I’d be honored if you’d accompany me.”

Lucy hesitated and looked at Finn. Every line of his face was taut, his nostrils flaring slightly, though he was careful to show no real expression. A surge of irritation hit her and she made a snap decision. If Finn wanted to continue this charade, then she could too. Besides, she saw no reason why she should confine herself to her hotel room, pining over Finn while he was gone.

“I’d be delighted, Mr. Halford. Thank you.”

“It will be my pleasure, my dear. Well then, I’ll be by to fetch you at seven o’clock this evening, if that is acceptable.”

“I’ll be ready.”

“Excellent.” Philip turned his attention to Finn. “Taggart, you’d better be on your way, hadn’t you?”

Finn pinned Lucy with a glare that, far from his intention, she was sure, made Lucy bite her lip to keep from grinning. Then he smiled at her and stepped closer, grasping both her arms as he pulled her to him. “Be well,
cousin
,” he said. He kissed her cheek, letting his lips linger a fraction longer than was polite. He pulled back slowly, keeping his cheek pressed against hers for as long as possible. “I shall see you when I return.”

His eyes burned into hers and she pulled back a bit, startled by the intensity. “Take care, Lucy.”

Lucy nodded dumbly, unable to come up with a single coherent retort. Finn’s chuckle as he hopped into the carriage broke the spell and she glared after him. Then again, she’d definitely gotten a reaction out of him. One she quite enjoyed. If agreeing to a simple soiree aggravated him this much, she’d have to make it a point to attend a few more.

…

Lucy sat before her vanity table while Lilah, a maid the hotel had found for her, dressed her hair. She’d been kept busy lately as Philip had been squiring her all over town. She enjoyed his company more than she’d anticipated. He was charming, funny, and flirtatious. She found it surprisingly enjoyable. Still, she missed Finn. He’d been away nearly two weeks and Lucy was in a fever of anticipation to see him again.

Tonight, Lucy was accompanying Philip to a ball he was hosting. It was apparently one of
the
social events of the season and everyone of any note would be attending. Though Lucy only cared about Finn. Philip had mentioned that Finn had returned. If he was going to be at the ball, she wanted to make sure she looked her best.

The thought of seeing Finn again brought a blush to her cheeks. Lilah caught sight of it.

“Your young man won’t be able to take his eyes off you.”

Startled, Lucy met the maid’s eyes in the mirror. “Pardon?”

“Nothin’ puts a blush to a girl’s cheeks like the thought of her love.” Lilah winked at her and turned her attention back to the strands of hair she was braiding.

Nothing would make her happier than to see Finn’s face alight with pleasure upon seeing her. But she knew that wouldn’t happen. Even if he appreciated her appearance, he’d most likely frown and glower as always. Why did she keep torturing herself? She was growing fonder of Philip. Perhaps she should give up on Finn and try to move on with her life.

But she didn’t think she could.

“No, I don’t…I don’t have…he doesn’t…” Lucy was horrified to hear the hitch in her voice. Tears burned behind her eyes, and for the first time in weeks, they spilled over, running down her cheeks.

“Oh, Miz Lucy! I’m so sorry. I shore didn’t aim to upset you.”

“No, no, it’s not your fault.” Lucy took a deep, shuddering breath. “It’s just…oh, I’ve just bungled everything.”

Lilah listened intently as Lucy filled her in on the complexities of her relationship with Finn, and the added complication of Philip.

When Lucy had finished, Lilah pursed her lips, her deft hands weaving in and out of Lucy’s hair.

“Well I hope you pardon my say so, miss, but why are you still hankerin’ for a man who says he doesn’t want you?”

Lucy laughed, though there was no happiness in the sound. “Yes, that is the question, isn’t it?”

She didn’t answer for a moment and then finally shrugged. “I love him. I’ve always loved him. And I can’t imagine ever not loving him. When he left, he took a part of me. And now that I’ve found him again…it’s as though I’m whole once more. As melodramatic as this will sound,” she said with a wry smile, “I was merely existing when he was gone. And now that he’s here, I feel alive again. Like I’m finally myself. I can’t go back to the way things were. I can’t live like that anymore. And despite what he says, I think he still loves me, too. Whatever his reasons for not wanting me here, I don’t think a lack of love is one of them.”

“Well, then. I suppose you have yo’ answer.”

Lucy’s mouth opened to protest. But she couldn’t make the words come out. Lilah was right. There were only two options. Go back to Boston, back to her old life. Or stay, and try and talk some sense into Finn. And the first option wasn’t really an option.

She nodded. “Fight it is, then.”

Lilah placed her hands on Lucy’s shoulders and turned Lucy on the stool so she was looking full in the mirror. “I think the battle is more than half won already, miss, if’n I do say so myself. Even if the man had no feelin’s for you, he’d be sore pressed to resist you tonight.”

Lucy’s stomach somersaulted. “Well, I don’t know about that. But I’m going to do my damn level best to make Finn remember what he’s missing.”

“Finn? Finnegan Taggart?”

“Yes. Do you know him?” Lucy asked, surprised.

“Yes, miss. Very well. He’s a mighty fine man. You couldn’t do better and that’s the God’s honest truth.”

“I agree, but I hope you don’t mind my asking why you think so. How do you know him?”

Lilah looked down, her face carefully blank. “I run a school. At night. I teach folks how to read a little, write some.”

“I think that’s wonderful,” Lucy said, giving the maid a warm smile.

“You do?”

“Of course. I’m sure there’s a great need for that.”

“Oh yes, miss, there surely is. My first master let me be educated with his daughter. She never wanted to sit with her tutor, but if I was there, she’d behave all right. So I got to learn right along with her. And now, well, I thought, if’n I could help others learn, maybe that could help their circumstances. They could go up north maybe, get jobs. Somethin’ better’n what they got.”

“And Finn?”

“He helps me sometimes. Comes in and helps teach. There’s so many that want to learn and I only know a little. Don’t have room to teach many neither. So they take turns. Some come one week, some another. Mr. Taggart, he comes in a couple times a week and helps out when he can.”

Lucy’s heart warmed. That sounded like the Finn she’d known. “Well you sound like you could use some more help. I’d be happy to assist in any way that I can.”

Lilah’s mouth dropped open. “Oh, Miz Lucy, that would be wonderful. Truly. But surely you don’t have time.”

Lucy laughed. “Actually, I’ve got nothing but time. Until our dear Mr. Taggart warms to the idea of me being here, I have no intention of leaving. But the last thing I want to do is sit around the hotel all day. I’d love to do something useful with my time, and I can’t imagine anything more worthwhile than helping to educate those who need it.”

“You…you understand that the folks I teach…they…they former slaves. All of them.”

“Well yes, I assumed as much.”

“And that don’t bother you none?”

“Should it?”

Lilah’s face went carefully blank again. “There’s a lot of folks out here that want things back the way they were. They don’t take very kindly to those who tryin’ to change things up, no matter what the laws might say now.”

“Well, those people can just go kiss my great-aunt Fanny. I do what I like and there is nothing more that I’d like than to help you with your school.”

Lilah nodded with a cautious grin. “We’d sure be grateful.”

“Wonderful! Well, how about tomorrow morning we can go down to this school of yours and have a look-see.”

Lilah’s face fell. “I work at the hotel during the days. That’s why folks only come by at night.”

“You let me take care of that. I’m sure the hotel will agree to let me hire you out for the remainder of my stay. I’ll just tell them I have need of a lady’s maid. I’m sure they will be accommodating.”

“If Mr. Taggart don’t just fall at your feet, that man is a fool.”

Lucy laughed. “On that, we agree.”

She stood and took one last look in the mirror. “Well, let’s see if we can get our stubborn Mr. Taggart to see reason.”

Lilah smiled and Lucy took a deep breath.

…

Lucy spun in Philip’s arms, the room whirring by her in a kaleidoscope of colors and sounds. All the laughing women, the grinning men, the fancy dresses with their enormous hoops, flew past her vision in a blur. One face stood out. One smoldering, fuming face stood out from all the rest. Would always stand out. But his bad humor was his own fault.

It was obvious, from the way Finn had been glowering at them all night that he’d heard about her little excursions with Philip while he’d been away. She’d made sure they’d been seen together often enough. Or if that wasn’t the case, Finn was at the very least, unhappy about how comfortable she seemed with Philip. Or maybe he was just nursing the old gripe that she’d ignored his wishes and stayed in town for the single purpose of attending this ball.

Well…tough beans for him. They hadn’t had an opportunity to speak in private again since he’d returned, so she had no idea what his exact complaints against Philip were and at the moment, she didn’t care. She hadn’t seen any untoward behavior, nothing that raised any alarms. In fact, even though she’d never feel for Philip what she felt for Finn, she rather enjoyed his company. She even found it pleasant being in his arms, though the slight warmth she felt in Philip’s embrace did not come close to the smoldering burn that scorched her with a mere look from Finn.

But if Finn didn’t want her with Philip, all he had to do to was admit that he loved her. She wasn’t asking for much. She didn’t care if they married or not. She’d very happily live in sin with him for the rest of her mortal days. Burning in hell would be worth it if she could spend her life in Finn’s arms. Not that she believed they’d suffer those consequences. The worst that would befall them would be possible ostracism from society. And society, in Lucy’s humble opinion, could take a flying leap into a cactus patch. She’d gladly give up her good name if it meant being with Finn.

Whatever catastrophic issues Finn thought he had, she would deal with. Why couldn’t the stubborn man just see that if he’d let her help him, his life would be so much better?

“Stubborn mule,” Lucy muttered.

“Pardon me, my dear?” Philip asked, leaning in to better hear her.

“Oh, nothing. I think I could use a bit of air, couldn’t you?”

“Ah,” Philip said with a chuckle. “It is rather warm in here. Shall we venture out into the gardens for a moment?”

“Oh yes, let’s,” Lucy said, smiling up at him. She threw a quick glance over her shoulder at Finn, who, as usual, was right on their heels.

They stepped out onto the terrace and Lucy took a deep breath of the cool night air. Philip placed his hand on her lower back to guide her toward the steps and Lucy could have sworn she heard Finn’s jaw popping, he was clenching so hard.

Serves him right
. She stifled the twinge of guilt she felt for using Mr. Halford to make Finn jealous. Though Lucy had no illusions that Philip was truly interested in her. After all, who was she? As far as Philip knew, she was merely the cousin of his employee. Hardly a suitable companion for someone from such an old family, someone who could very likely be sitting in the White House conversing with President Johnson in the near future.