Beautiful Lover (5 page)

Royce’s house hasn’t changed much since I was last here. It still looks like a frat house, but that’s mostly because he shares it with assholes one and two. Royce has the master bedroom with the private bath because it is his house. His friends and I use the term loosely, rent from him. Thankfully they aren’t home. The asshole duo could have been at the fights for all I know, not that I care to know.

“I’ll leave you to freshen up.” Royce looks at me longingly.

I’m so pumped up right now. I’d love to be able to feel the love I used to for him. Maybe with time I will. I inhale his scent in the bathroom. Royce has always smelled of sandalwood and soap. The smell is comforting to me. I sit my bag on top of the commode and strip of my dress, I hope it isn’t ruined. I take a wash rag from the linen closet and wash my face and my arms. I probably should have taken a shower, but I am pressed for time if I don’t want to be late for work. I’m cutting it close as it is.

I shimmy into my yoga pants and tank top. At least my hair has held up. Sug should work in a salon. I apply some mascara and lip gloss. I don’t bother with anything more.

Royce is waiting patiently for me downstairs.

“It’s a good feeling to see you back here with me. I wish things were different Kings. If I hadn’t been such a prick we could be married right now.” He looks sad, and I can’t withstand that expression he is showing me right now.

“Royce, let’s not go there tonight. You don’t— you can’t know that. Besides you know I don’t want to get married until after I finish school. We will talk I promise, but I really need you to drive me to work.”

“Promises, promises.” He winks at me in an attempt to lighten the mood. The thought of being married terrifies me. Especially after watching my mom and Charlie all these years, if what they have is considered a happy marriage and love, I want no part of it.

The drive to work is quiet. Royce is in deep thought and I allow myself to get lost in the scenery as we pass by all the flashing lights and neon signs. I take in the people walking the strip and find myself wondering what some of their stories are and how they ended up here.

Royce stops near the parking garage entrance. “Do you want me to give you a lift home later?”

“I’ll be okay. I will text you when I get home.” I lean across the console and give him a feather light peck on the lips.

**

I fucked up tonight. I pushed too hard and now she is backing off. I love her so much. Doesn’t she realize she is it for me? I can’t wait for this to be over, for Parker to get what’s been coming to him… Kingsley will see he’s no good. She will see that she loves me just as much as I love her. I just have to be patient and wait for Parker to screw up.

**

Saturdays at the club are usually pretty busy with people here for a weekend getaway or men in town for a convention. With the hectic day I have experienced I could use a busy night of working it to distract my mind from wandering to thoughts of Parker. Glancing at the clock on my phone I only have five minutes to get in the club, get changed and ready to take the stage. I quickly rush through the employee entrance and almost take out Tony on my way.

“Where’s the fire?” He chuckles as he grabs hold of my arm and steadies me.

“Sorry Tony. No time. I’m late,” I adjust my heavy bag and bring it back to a rest on my shoulder instead of letting it continue to weigh down my forearm.

I nearly topple over Sasha as I rush in to the dancers lounge. “Baby, if you want me all you have to do is say the word. You don’t have to jump my bones.”

“Just NO!” Sasha is merely joking but tonight is not the night for her lame come-ons. Without a second thought I sling my bag down in my chair and start getting into costume. Smoothly I guide my mask over my face and finish getting dressed with seconds to spare before I take the stage. Tonight is exciting because it’s theme night. I get the pleasure of dressing up like a masked doll and swinging across the stage. Not to mention I get an oversized lollipop. They are cherry flavored, my favorite. Sug gets the finest prop, the giant martini glass.

**

I’m at the end of my shift and have just changed from my costume. I call for Tony to walk me to my car when I remember that I didn’t drive. “I’m sorry Tony. I forgot I didn’t drive myself. Can you call me a cab?”

“Yeah, sure thing. I’ll let you know when it’s here.”

“Thanks,” I slide down into the sofa by the back entrance of the club to uncomplainingly wait for my ride. To pass the time I whip my phone out and check my messages. I already have a text from Royce. I told him I’d text him when I make it home.

Royce: I wish you were lying next to me.

He is being sweet. I’ll give him that, maybe I should surprise him and slip in bed beside him. The spare key he gave me still rests on my key ring. I never returned it when we broke-up. I’m fiddling with the key when Tony comes to let me know that there is a car waiting for me just outside the back door.

Outside of the club there is only Parker Garrett and a black Mercedes waiting for me. “Can I give you a ride?” Like I have a choice, I don’t suppose telling him no would suffice. Having the man you’ve been sleeping with drive you to your ex-boyfriends would be all kinds of wrong. Seeing Royce will have to wait. I know I need to end things with Parker now before I get in too deep. If I am going to really give Royce a fair chance there is no time like the present to end things with Parker.

He opens the passenger door for me and I reluctantly get in.

“You’re date doesn’t keep good company.”

“My date is none of your business and I am sure you know nothing of him. You are just upset that I didn’t cancel my plans for you. I’m not your beck and call girl.” Once we are in the parking lot of my building Parker pulls me across the console and takes me in his arms, holding me against his heavy hearted chest.

“I’ve wanted you since the first night I saw you up on stage. Why do you think I keep coming back? I’m an important man Kingsley. I don’t have to come to the club on business ever. I needed to get close to you…to touch you… to have you.”

“And now that you’ve had me?”

“I want you Kingsley, but there are things about me that I haven’t told you.”

“So tell me. I’m a big girl Parker. Whatever it is I can handle it.”

“I can’t, not yet…I just I don’t know, you make me crazy Kingsley. All day I think about you and ways to get close to you. But my life it’s not one I’d wish on anyone. You are so beautiful, if anything ever happened to you…”

“Parker I’m not sure I follow where you are going with this.”

“I’ve done things…bad things to get what I want. I’ve hurt people…”

“I’m sure it can’t be that bad Parker. But you aren’t ready to tell me and that’s okay. I understand. I need to tell you something…” I start to tell him about Royce but he looks so tortured I have to let him down easy. I can see that he is fighting with himself over something. He looks at me with sad eyes and now I just want to be with him— to take his pain away. I want to suck him off and make him forget whatever is hurting him, but then Royce flashes across my mind.

I can give myself to Parker one more time can’t I? Does it make me bad to want him again? No I should end it now. I steady my hand over the beating of his heart. I will never forget the way it feels against the palm of my hand. Forcefully I tear myself from his arms and I stop at the door. Looking back at him I say, “You deserve to be with a classy woman Parker.”

“Maybe, but those classy girls don’t taste as good on my lips as you do.” Parker reaches across the car and tangles his fingers in my hair before pulling me in for the kiss of all kisses. His tongue swipes across the bottom of my lip, he moans an Mmm against my mouth before pushing his tongue into my mouth and claiming me as his. I answer his claim and our tongues dance in a tango.

“Stop,” I pant and sag against the door as I fumble for the door handle. “I can’t Parker. I’m not a friend with benefits type of girl. I don’t go around sleeping with a different man every night.”

“Who said anything about being friends Kingsley; I want you as my lover and mine only. I don’t like to share. I assumed you understood that after our fun in the bathroom. It’s different with you. I don’t go around fucking my friends. I tell you what, when you are ready to grow up, come see me.”

Come see him when I grow up…Who does he think he is dismissing me like a child? I’ll show him a child… After collecting myself and my emotions I remove myself from his car and he speeds off in to the distance.

**

“Damn it,” I beat my hands against the dash of my car. I could have had her tonight I could see it, she was ready to say she’d be mine, but then she hesitated and she looked at me the way that Elizabeth looked at me when she told me she slept with Royce, my best friend… My head hurts… I miss her… I know what needs to be done. Last time I fucked up but this time will be different.

Kline’s truck is here and the lights are on inside the apartment. I really hope he is alone but the sound of numerous voices tells me he is celebrating his win. Is it wrong that I don’t want to join in on the celebration? Maybe I would be more in the celebrating mood if I knew Kline was finished taking on Charlie’s troubles. A good sister would suck it up and join the party, but tonight I am feeling selfish. Instead of celebrating I opt out of joining Kline and his buddies for beer and jello shots. Driving myself straight into Royce’s arms.

Just as I thought my key still works and the security alarm pin is the same. I enter the six digit code in and walk upstairs to slip in bed with Royce. When I reach the top of the stairs I am just in time to hear the faint moans of a woman crying out with an, “oh yes.”
This isn’t my night
. I turn too quickly on my heel and take a roll down the stairs. “Fuck,” escapes my lips a little too loudly. My plan to make a quiet escape without Royce knowing I caught him and leaving with my dignity is an epic failure. That quick turn has cost me greatly; I can only hope I haven’t injured myself too greatly.

Karma must be paying me back for all the times I have ever done wrong in my life, because my right ankle can not bear my weight right now and to add to my humiliation Brad is standing at the top of the stairs in his boxers.

He turns the light on that is centered over the middle of the stairway. “Kingsley is that you?”

“Yeah,” I hobble to the couch in the living room.

Royce comes running down the stairs wiping sleep from his eyes. It comforts me to no end to know that the moan I was hearing wasn’t coming from his room. I am a perfect example of what happens when you assume things. “Kings, not that I’m not glad to see you, but what are you doing?”

“I changed my mind. I was going to surprise you and I heard a woman, and I…”

“You thought I had someone over?” Royce is kneeling in front of me and he takes my hands. “I told you I want us to work. I need you to trust me. Brad’s girlfriend Kelsey is staying over.”

“I know. I’m sorry it was wrong of me to assume.” I twist my ankle it is feeling uncomfortable and the strap of my shoe is feeling tight, it’s pinching my skin. A hiss of discomfort leaves my lips as Royce turns his attention to my swelling ankle.

He turns on the side table lamp and inspects my aching foot. “I think you just twisted it really well, but if you want me to take you to the emergency room I will.”

“I just want to lie next to you. Can we just go to bed?”

“Yeah but you better let me get some ice on that ankle.”

**

“I really like waking up with you in my bed. I may not let you out of it.” Royce has his head lying on my breasts. It does feel right being here with him. Nothing happened last night other than him giving me a rough time for suspecting the worst of him.

“Well I do have the next three days off.”

“Don’t tempt me to hold you here. Trust me I want to but I have training all week. You could stay here though, if Kline is still throwing a rager. Or you could stay because you want to. It would be really nice to come home to you waiting for me.”

My ankle feels so stiff, it hurts to stretch. I let out a low whimper. “That’s it. I’m taking today off so I can take care of you.”

“I’ll be fine really. But I appreciate the offer. It is tempting, but I don’t want you missing out on your workouts because I am a big baby.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” He rolls over on top of me supporting his weight with his knees planted on each side of me.

“At least let me treat you to breakfast and a shower.” He kisses up my throat to the corner of my mouth rubbing his stubble against my jaw.

“Deal.”

**

Royce is standing behind me in the shower. I can tell he is trying so hard to restrain himself by being on his best behavior. I agreed to allow him to help me shower only if we stay in our underwear. The heat from the shower isn’t the only thing making it hot in here, the heat radiating off his body is making it hard for me not to turn around and delve my tongue in his mouth. The temptation to run my fingers through his hair and let him do all the things he used to is hard to resist.

Royce closes the gap between us and the touch of his flesh to mine sets me ablaze with want. The flame is flickering between my thighs as he kisses the back of my neck so lightly it is barely a whisper. His hands skillfully wash my arms in such a way I am about to crack and let him have me. The water runs over me, each drop is like needles, my skin is so sensitive. My breasts have grown heavy and his muscles are hard —tense. Yet he remains calm and resistant of what he wants.

“How’s your foot,” I nearly jump at his deep husky voice laced with desire. My head is swimming with images of him pressing me against the cool tile of the shower wall, his smell envelopes me in a blanket. The steam is blinding me. I can’t fight the urge to have him any longer. I’m so hungry for his love.

“Royce,” I whisper his name hoarsely. “Please Royce, I want you.”

“What happened to slow?” He wraps his muscular arms around my waist. My head falls back against his chest, his mouth closes over mine. Royce reaches behind him without stopping our kiss to turn the water off. He lets me go only to sweep me off my feet. Carrying me dripping wet to his bed. Looking down at me with a warm smile he says,” you are so beautiful it almost hurts to look at you. To think I ever let you go. I can’t walk away from you again Kings.”

Part of me knows I should stop this now before I lead him any further but I want him too badly to stop. “Make love to me Royce.”

My fingers trace the intricate pattern of the star tattoos that cover his upper torso. I never noticed before but on the inside of the first is my name. A tear slips from my eye as I wonder when he did such a thing. He inches down closer to me on the bed and lies down next to me. He takes over guiding my fingers to the next star, “one day these will bear our children’s names.” My fingers are brought to his mouth and the promise of his words is sealed with a kiss.

Royce really does love me? Doesn’t he? I know now that I want him. What girl could walk away when he puts it into words that tell his intentions and show his true devotion? Slow and sweet he takes his time showing me just how deeply he loves me. Royce worships my body with his hands and his greedy tongue. My heart will always treasure the unspoken moment that we just shared. Now it’s my turn to show my love and devotion. My muscles quake and tremble as my body sinks down onto his length. Roaming hands travel to my hips as they buck and roll milking him inside of me.

Royce making love to me was nothing by way of comparison primal like Parker fucking me. Where everything about Parker is cold and hard, Royce is warm and tender. I can’t help but wonder if Parker would or could ever care for me in the way that Royce has and does.

“I hate to kiss and run, but I have to get to the gym if I’m going to make my training session before I work tonight.”

Royce works as a freelance security escort. He has always been very secretive about who he works for. We only have ever talked about it once the whole time we have known each other; he had to sign a non-disclosure agreement. The only information he could divulge was that he is paid extremely well. It is my understanding that Brad and Jake works for the same client as well.

I asked Kline once if he knew anything about the people Royce worked for and he said the less I knew the better and warned me not to go looking for answers I wasn’t prepared to handle—whatever that means. I over heard an argument between my brother and Royce a few years ago that was something along the lines of Royce had better not ever let his job touch me or he would look funny trying to walk without legs. I was promised that his job has nothing to do with drugs so that’s something I suppose.

Royce leaves me to myself with the promise that I will stay here until he comes home. I want to stay here but I need to get up with Tiffany to make sure Kline hasn’t deterred her from being my friend completely. Also I need to check in on my mom and the bastard Charlie. And I hope Kline didn’t party too hard and burn our place down last night. Royce doesn’t get off until around midnight so that gives me plenty of time to run my errands and be here waiting when he returns. I throw his bedding into the wash and make my way to the kitchen for the breakfast that I was promised.