Ask Adam (23 page)

Who was he kidding? His little swimmers could be hastily making their way to her fertile ovaries right this minute. Who the hell knew? One of them might have struck it lucky already.

She blanched at the thought.

Adam stalked out of the bathroom and into the living room. She darted after him. He snatched his clothes up from the floor, shoved his legs into his pants and pulled them up.

“Wait, what are you doing?”

“What do you think I’m doing?” He shot her a scathing look. “I have to go.”

“You’re leaving?” she squeaked. “Now?” In the middle of everything? Okay, he was angry, but they needed to discuss this. Leaving wouldn’t resolve anything.

“Another thing you forgot?” he asked acidly. “I’m going overseas tomorrow.”

Forgot? Hardly. She dreaded tomorrow, dreaded the thought of two weeks without him. “Adam, you can’t go yet.” Panic clawed at her chest. “We should talk, work this out before you leave.”

“Talk?” he roared. “You think talking will stop you falling pregnant?” He did up his belt. “I have to pack.”

Oh, and packing was a more effective means of prophylactics? She gawked at him in disbelief. It would be so easy to throw her sarcasm in his face, to haul insults back at him, but one of them had to remain level-headed and Adam wasn’t exactly volunteering for the job. “Please, think calmly for a minute. We can’t just assume this…mistake will result in a pregnancy. In fact, it’s most unlikely.” At least she prayed it was unlikely. “But just in case, we have to work out how we’d deal with it if I were.”

Adam froze, but just for a second, then he pushed his arm into a shirt sleeve. “This is all I need. Two weeks overseas wondering whether the hell you’re pregnant or not.” He pushed his other arm into his shirt. “Goddamn it. How could I be such an ass? So hot to get into your pants, I couldn’t think logically for one minute. Couldn’t act like a man and put a condom on.”

Lexi couldn’t repress her snort. Oh, he’d acted like a man earlier. Now he acted like a boy.

He shot her a nasty look. “Think this is funny? You’re as much to blame as I am. You could also have used your head a little.”

She bristled at the cruelty in his tone, tried unsuccessfully to ignore it. Their discussion had brought down his defenses
¾
she mustn’t forget that. She’d pushed him on issues he might not have been ready to tackle. He was vulnerable and hurting.

Still, it didn’t give him the right to act like an animal
¾
or to treat her like one, no matter what the circumstances. “Are you saying it’s alright for you to get carried away by the heat of the moment, but not me?” Her spine bristled. Shit, remaining even-tempered wasn’t so easy. At the best of times, Lexi had trouble controlling her tongue. A potentially explosive dilemma like this one didn’t help at all.

“No. I think we both made a huge mistake tonight.” He grimaced. “You knew my thoughts about babies. What the fuck do you think we just discussed? I told you I don’t want to have more kids.” His voice turned hoarse but no less angry. “I told you about Timmy and you didn’t remind me to use protection.”

Timmy. Her breath caught in her throat. That was a low blow. It was bloody unfair of him to use his son to make his point. A point she already knew and understood all too well. How could she defend herself against a dead child?

She didn’t want to try.

“Don’t do it,” she warned, her own temper seconds away from erupting. “Don’t try and use your son against me. Yes, you told me about him and about your refusal to have more kids.” Pain flashed across his face but was quickly masked by fury and loathing. “Timmy has nothing to do with what happened between us tonight.”

“What happened tonight was the action of two careless, stupid adults…” Adam’s eyes narrowed to dangerous slits and his lips thinned in fury. “Unless…”

Prickles of apprehension tapped on her spine. “Unless what?”

A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Unless only I was careless, and you did this on purpose.”

“Pardon?” She
had not
heard him correctly.

“You did, didn’t you?”

“I did what?” she asked, aghast. No way could he think that.

“You did this on purpose.”

Lexi’s jaw dropped open. He did. He honestly believed she’d tried to get pregnant. The prickles of apprehension turned to stabbings of rage.

“What did you want, Lexi?” he seethed. “To trap me? You knew I couldn’t make a commitment to you. Did you think you’d just try and get one anyway?”

Lexi stared at him, too stricken to answer. The very thought had bile rising in her throat. Was he out of his mind? Was the man deranged?

“You think it would be that simple? You’d get pregnant and I’d suddenly want to be with you forever? Is that what all the talk was about? I should get over Timmy so I could accept another child into my life. A child that was a mistake? A set-up?”

Her chin hit the floor as the impact of his accusation hit home.

How dare he? They’d shared too much for him to believe that of her. Sure, he was angry and vulnerable, but even in that state he couldn’t think so little of her. Could he?

“Sorry, lady, it doesn’t work that way. You don’t stoop so low and get away with it.”

Lexi pulled back her hand to slap him, then stopped herself. Fury bubbled in her belly. She’d likely break his nose if she hit him now. As enticing as the thought was, it was not very practical. It would just compound the whole screwed-up situation. Not only would he think she’d tricked and deceived him, he’d probably sue her for damages too.

“I expected more from you, Lexi.” He tackled the buttons on his shirt. “Way more.”

She curled her hand into a fist next to her leg and reminded herself that blood was hard as the devil to clean up.

“I never thought you’d stoop to such levels,” he ranted. “I told you how much I could give. You didn’t listen.”

Why, the arrogant son of a bitch. Lawsuits and bloodstains be damned.

Her hand landed with a resounding crack on his cheek. She kept it well clear of his nose and watched in satisfaction as a dark red impression of her hand formed just below his cheekbone.

For once, Adam was speechless. He looked from her hand to her face and did not say a word. For a couple of seconds, astonished disbelief replaced the anger in his eyes.

“You think I planned this?” Lexi took advantage of his silence to have her say. “You think I want to get pregnant
¾
or open myself up to the prospect of a sexually transmitted disease?”

His face was ice cold. “I assure you, you won’t get a sexually transmitted disease from me. Can you give me the same assurances? Can you assure me you won’t get pregnant?”

“Fuck you, Riley.” She couldn’t possibly give him that guarantee and he knew it. “You know what? I was right about you from the beginning. You’re a cold, callous bastard. A heartless, cruel, vindictive bastard.” She glared at him. “How dare you make such unfair assumptions about my behavior? How dare you take our night of beautiful lovemaking and turn it into some cheap scam on my part?”

His glared back at her, but before he could speak, she beat him to it. “Yes, we’re facing a crisis. Yes, I may well be pregnant, but accusing me of such treachery is not a solution to our predicament.” Goddamn it. They had to face it together, come up with a plan that suited both of them. “I know you don’t want children, Adam. I get that. It doesn’t reduce my risk of pregnancy now.”

They’d come so far together. They’d made real progress. Why did he have to cut it all short? Push her away again? Damn, he didn’t just push, he picked her up and threw her. Was she too close? Had she scared him? Made him see how lonely he really was? Was his only means of defense to attack?

Logic told her it wasn’t personal. Adam was angry and hurt and he took it out on her. Her clients did it all the time. Only Adam wasn’t her client. He
was
personal. He’d hurt her. Pissed her off. No one pissed her off and got away with it. No one. Not even the man she loved, and not even under dire circumstances like these.

“You know what?” she asked, her voice a venomous whisper. “I tried. I really tried to like you. For a while there, I did. I started to care, even fell a little in love with you.” A little? That was a laugh. There wasn’t a cell in her body that didn’t love him completely—even if she detested him right now. “And what did it get me? Nothing, apart from your contempt and your accusations. Well, guess what? I’m through trying. I’ve had enough. I will not stand here and allow you to abuse me like this.” She stalked to the front door, pausing only to pick up his shoes and socks. Then she yanked the door open and threw them out.

“Leave, please,” she told him dispassionately, though her stomach and heart yelled for him to stay. To top it all, her head reeled at the prospect of facing a possible pregnancy alone. “Get out of my home and out of my life, and this time—don’t come back.”

He stared at her for a minute, his face grim and set. Then he gave a short, sharp nod, fastened his pants and walked out the door. He didn’t even give her a backward glance as he leaned down and picked up his shoes.

Lexi’s temper ignited. The asshole could at least have tried one more time. Could have turned around and apologized. Could have begged her forgiveness. Could have promised he’d stick by her if she was pregnant. Could just have said goodbye. He could have, but he didn’t. He just walked out, and she lost it.

Before she could stop herself, she called after his retreating form, “How does it feel, Riley? To think that I may be pregnant with your child, and to know that you will never find out—one way or the other?”

Lexi collapsed against the front door, aghast. Had that really just happened? Had Adam accused her of trying to trap him with an unwanted pregnancy?

She didn’t know which was worse—the prospect that she may be pregnant or the weight of his accusation. Nausea, which had threatened to engulf her for the last ten minutes, seized control.

She made it to the bathroom in the nick of time. The contents of her stomach emptied themselves into the toilet bowl. She threw up twice before the bile began to settle.

This was not how she’d perceived her future. This was not the white-picket-fence happy ending she’d always dreamed about. She existed in a nightmarish world of bad mistakes. The first bad mistake had been Adam. The second had been forgetting the condom.

Now she faced her third bad mistake alone—the possibility of a pregnancy with a child whose father despised her.

Chapter Fifteen

Adam was in hell. No two ways about it.

He swore and rubbed his hands over his eyes as he sat up in bed. His shoulders ached and his neck was in spasm. Every time he tried to turn it to the left, sharp jabs of heat tore through his shoulder, straight up to his chin. Christ, he was barely awake and he had a tension headache. Another one.

The hotel bed was not to blame. It was perfectly comfortable. No, the headache had nothing to do with the current five star accommodations and everything to do with the hellcat whose home he had stalked out of the previous night. Or was it the night before? He’d lost track of time.

He checked his watch. Six forty-five in the morning. Which meant it was eight forty-five back home. He reached for the phone and for the umpteenth time since he’d landed in Hong Kong, punched in the code for Australia, and then Lexi’s mobile number. For the umpteenth time, he got her voice mail. He swore, not bothering to leave a message.

Next, he dialed the hospital.

“Department of Social Work, this is Penny speaking.”

“Lexi Tanner, please.” If he couldn’t get her at home, he’d get her at the office.

“One moment please and I’ll connect you. Whom may I say is calling?”

“Adam Riley.”

“Oh, um. AJ Riley?”

“Yes, AJ Riley.”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Riley, Lexi is not taking calls at the moment.”

“You just said you’d connect me.”

“I know, but Lexi’s signaling to me that she’s not accepting calls.”